Month: February 2018

‘Mueller’s Coming’ — #Lyrics To A Woke Pop Song

Let me state for the record that I know none of these lyrics I’m writing will ever be performed. I don’t know anything about music, I just like writing stories in verse. These lyrics are just so obvious that I’m sure they may have already been done by a late night show and I just don’t know about it. But these aren’t meant to be funny, though they probably will come off as that simply because they’re riffing off a similar song by Three Dog Night.

Mueller’s Coming
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

Mueller’s coming Trump
Mueller’s coming Jared
Mueller’s coming Ivanka
you better hide your documents

Trump you better hide your documents
Mueller’s coming
Mueller’s coming
Trump you better hide your documents
Trump you better hide your docuents

Mueller’s coming
hide, hide, hide, hide
hide your documents Trump
Mueller’s coming
you better hide those documents

you’re never going to get away
get away from the long arm of the law
Mueller has your number Trump
he’s on your trail
he’s going to track down your crimes

Mueller’s coming Trump
Mueller’s coming Jared
Mueller’s coming Ivanka
you better hide your documents

[bridge]
Trump the big house is coming for you
Mueller’s on his way
you’ll soon be through

Mueller’s coming Trump
Mueller’s coming Jared
Mueller’s coming Ivanka
you better hide your documents

‘Tick Tick Tick’ — #Lyrics To A Woke Pop-HipHop Song

This would be an extremely dancable pop song with some meaning to it. I’m gravely disappointed with how meh pop music is these days when it comes to politics. I’m so frustrated I’m writing lyrics to pop songs that will never be performed.

Tick Tick Tick
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

we’re waiting
waiting, waiting, waiting
tick tick tick
bom
tick tick tick
boom
tick tick tick
boom

what the next big scoop
we’re going to read
when will the cannon go off
we wait in front of our screens
when we read the tweet that states
tick tick tick tick
tick tick tick tick
tick tick tick tick

we’re waiting
waiting, waiting, waiting
tick tick tick
bom
tick tick tick
boom
tick tick tick
boom

when will the final boom
strike this adminstration
that’s what we want to know
meanwhile we wait, wait, wait
tick tick tick
tick tick tick
tick tick tick
tick tick boom, boom, boom

[bridge]
things seem dire
but we’re reaching higher
we’re going to touch the sky
once Trump waves goodbye

we’re waiting
waiting, waiting, waiting
tick tick tick
bom
tick tick tick
boom
tick tick tick
boom

‘Dear Melania’ — #Lyrics To A Woke Pop Song

This is meant to be a peppy pop song you might hear on the radio. At least, that’s my vision for the music associated with it.

Dear Melania
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

dear Melania
he’s using you it’s obvious to see
dump him quick as can be please
your friends are all moochers
using you, using him
I’ve got some advice for you

tell them please
you’re more than they bargained for
you’re more than they bargained for
you’re more than they bargained for

imagine the look on his face
when you tell him with all your grace
that it’s over and you’re taking Barron forthwith
you’ve got it in you I know
to end this charade once and for all

it might be the last straw
if he lost his fire lady once and for all
things have been stormy between you two
he treats you like a dog
why are you still with him we all want to know
drop him like a hot brick
real quick, real quick

tell the powers that be
tell them please
you’re more than they bargained for
you’re more than they bargained for
you’re more than they bargained for

[bridge]
we’re all waiting to see
if you’ve got the guts to break free
he’ll beg and plead for you to stay
but you’ve got to ditch him now

dear Melania
hear my plea
dear Melania
listen to me
listen to me
listen to me

‘Enjoy’ — #Lyrics To Woke Pop-Rock Song

This would be a really hard rocking pop song. Something that, say, The White Stripes might perform. That’s my vision for it at least.

Enjoy
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

enjoy the humming economy they tell me
enjoy the wasted youth shot down with a gun
enjoy the dismay that the powers that be
are out to get you and me
just sit back and get laid
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy

enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy

enjoy the rape of the environment
enjoy the misogyny in the name of God
enjoy the racism in the White House
that’s what we got right now
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy

enjoy the lack of leadership
enjoy your vote and voice not meaning shit
enjoy the NRA calling for violence on your TV
enjoy the Russians having us by the throat
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy

enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy

[bridge]
we’re all in this together
we need to act like it I fret
nothing will change if we just enjoy
the humming economy

we have to take a stand
we have to fight in the rain
I’m going to enjoy when the era is over
and freedom is won
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy
enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy

‘Russian Collusion’ — #Lyrics To A Pop-Rock Ballad

This is meant to be a pop-rock ballad like Pulp’s Common People. That’s the goal, at least. Something rocking that tells a story, in this instance something political.

Russian Collusion
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

the year was 2016 and we thought
that Hillary Clinton was a sure shot
then things began to go haywire
with emails, emails, emails, emails
Trump told us all with great gaul
that he wanted the Russians to release
all of Clinton’s lost emails
but the evidence shows much more
Trump wanted to win no matter what
so he broke the law

I’m talking about
Russian collusion
Russian collusion
Russian collusion
we all it’s real
we all see it happened

it’s all something we know is true
how else do you explain how Trump divides us so
by now we all know it by rote
we need to see the truth
the facts are a big discrace
the sooner we see the facts
the sooner we can fix this problem
we can scream and shout all we want
but the Russian are complicit in this mess
so it all makes me want to hiss

I’m talking about
Russian collusion
Russian collusion
Russian collusion
we all it’s real
we all see it happened

[bridge]
we’re all going to have to fight
fight for what is right
we can let’em get us down
things will get better if we vote, vote, vote

we need to lace up our shoes
get ready to protest in the streets
when Mueller releases the deets
when Mueller releases the deets
when Mueller releases the deets

‘Woke Girl’ — #Lyrics To A Pop-R&B Song

I’m just annoyed that pop culture isn’t responding to Trump’s affects on our daily life and so occasionally a song concept pops into my head.

Woke Girl
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

she’s the one I need by my side
when we go for a revolutionary ride
tells me what I need to hear
makes it clear we’re in for trouble
she’s not to be trifled with
wears her beret with great flare
tells me things no one else dares

she’s my woke girl
woke girl
woke girl
woke girl
she’s my woke girl
she’s my woke girl

we’re dealing with a madman in the White House
a tyrant it’s clear
but I got a woke girl in my bed
one who gives good mind it’s clear
we’re all in this together dear
she says late at night while we plan

I’m ready to take to the streets
while we rumble between the sheets
I love her with all heart
her beauty makes the secret police dart
she’s as smart as they come
give Yoko a run for her money

she’s my woke girl
woke girl
woke girl
woke girl
she’s my woke girl
she’s my woke girl

[bridge]
we’re going to fight
fight until daylight
nothing will be the same
when we overthrow the pain

woke girl I love you so
want you to know
you’re the best thing I have
with you by my side
revolution will be had

woke girl
I love you so
woke girl
I love you so
woke girl
woke girl

‘Big Man On Campus’ — #Lyrics To An Anti-Gun Pop-Rock Song

I’m frustrated by how meh pop music is these days and I enjoy writing lyrics for no other reason than it’s relaxing, so you get this. It’s just me trying to tell a story in verse. You can be the judge as to how well I do. I have no beats, but I do like pop-rock songs.

Big Man On Campus
Lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

he hold his gun
thinks it’ll change everything
he’s going to rule the roost
the voices in his head said it was so
quietly walking to school
he can hear the bells ring
everything will change once it’s done
he’ll be on the top rung
he’ll be

big man on campus
at last, at last
big man on campus
at last, at last

he gets on campus
finds the spot he knows so well
things are going to endup swell
he begins to shoot with his gun
chuckling as the students begin to run
he’s got the power that he craves
people will respect him now
that’s a fact
because there’s no doubt
he’s

big man on campus
at last, at last
big man on campus
at last, at last

[bridge]
we’re all worried
as we hide in our classroom
when is he going to leave
will we end up dead
our we get to live
to tell the tale

thoughts and prayers
don’t mean shit
I’m afraid
we have to address the facts
make sure this can’t happen again
again, again, again, again again
when will there be no more

big men on campus
big men on campus
big men on campus

V-Log: Mulling #Writing A Gen. X Homage To The Big Chill #screenwriting

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I have talked enough. It’s time to put up or shut up. I am going to try to sketch out some scenes tonight of a Gen. X homage to The Big Chill. I have vowed to myself that I’m not going to buy Final Draft until I have finished a novella — or something — that proves to me that I am serious about all of this.

But only time will tell. Talking and not doing is so much fun that I worry that I’ll just bounce to another concept or project and never get this one finished. But I really hope that isn’t the case.

Some Mulling Of A ‘Big Chill’ Screenplay For Gen X #screenwriting

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I am saving up money to buy a high end digital camera, but in the meantime, I’m interested in writing a screenplay. I’ve vowed to myself I’m not going to buy Final Draft until I’ve sketched out a novella. The screenplay concept I’ve come up with is pretty strong.

It’s meant to be a “Big Chill” type movie for Gen X people. That’s the vision, at least. And it would have a lot of Trump talk in it as well. I guess I what I really want is someone to talk about it with for a little while to figure out in my head if the concept is as strong as I think it is.

But no one seems willing to do so.

The key thing is, I have to produce the copy. I have to actually put in the hard work. That’s the tough part. But it’s not impossible.

‘Parkland’ — #Lyrics To An Angry Pop-Rap Song

I have no beats, but I’m angry enough about the events in Florida that I’m going to try my hand at an anti-gun pop-rap that one might find coming from Kanye West. I’m not claiming I’m any good, but it’s cathartic, if nothing else.

Parkland
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

thoughts and prayers
thoughts and prayers
thoughts and prayers

here we are yet again
watching kids run this and that
this is fucked up and that’s a fact
dear listen close I’m going to explain
how much pain we’re in within the frame
guns are on the street locked and ready
our luck keeps running out I’m afraid
I want to leer when you say
that God will find a way

parkland
parkland
is on my screen
makes me want to scream
parkland
parkland
makes me want to scream
makes me want to scream
makes me want to scream

what is wrong with us all
that this is acceptable
when are we going to fight back
we need to take back our nation
we’re better than this
we’ve got to believe
things can’t stay this way
children are dying and lamed
when will we make change
why do we have to live in pain
we’re arguing over taxes
and PBS
when we should be addressing
our need for gun control

parkland
parkland
is on my screen
makes me want to scream
parkland
parkland
makes me want to scream
makes me want to scream
makes me want to scream

[bridge]
we’re going to have to fix this
our children depend on us
they shouldn’t have to run
why are there so many guns

we have to depend on our own fate
why are we fighting over this
at such a late date
things are only going to get worse
we have to fight the good fight
the NRA can just suck it

parkland
makes me want to scream
makes me want to scream
makes me want to scream