Author: Shelton Bumgarner

I am the Editor & Publisher of The Trumplandia Report

Is 2023 a New 1788?

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

As I grow more and more alarmed about what is going to happen in late 2024, early 2025, I think I’m going to add more books about the French Revolution to books that I buy then wait years to read.

It seems to me that because of income inequality, the United States may burst into civil war and revolution as part of the 2024 presidential cycle. And, honestly, sometimes I think it’s just a matter if its Blues or Reds who are going to be the ones who get fed up and bolt the Union. (Spoiler Alert: it will probably be Blues.)

But the United States is so huge, diverse and powerful that if we collapse into civil war and or revolution, it will one of the biggest events not just in American history — but human history. The only thing I can compare it to would be the 1789 – 1799 French Revolution combined with the American Civil War.

The world really will be turned upside down if the United States should buckle – it probably would prompted WW3. The entire global order would be thrown up in the air until everything was sorted out one way or another. And just because Blues might leave the Union to start their own center-Left nation doesn’t mean that there wouldn’t be mission creep and, ultimately, there would be a global conflagration that would totally re-arrange the entire global framework.

But, before I go down that hysterical path TOO much, remember — I’m always wrong. I think, in the end, that DeSantis will be elected and initially, any changes in the United States will be rather subtle. It won’t be until 20 years of DeSantis consolidating power that we’ll endup invading Canada to overthrow the “woke cancel culture mob” there.

Or, put another way — I’m probably full of shit and why are you even listening to me at all? Wink.

I Know More About Internet History Than Scott Galloway, Apparently

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I lived through the rise of the Internet and one thing I was obsessed with was micropayments. So, when I listened to the latest Pivot podcast and Scott Galloway ranted about how everything would be better now on the Internet if we had used micropayments instead of advertising, I started.

Now, I’m too lazy to give you specific names, but here, in general, what happened.

In short, the reason why we didn’t use micropayments as the basis for supporting the digital economy is Visa bought up all the micropayment companies then smothered them. So, there you go. With that done, the digital economy, out of desperation, turned to advertising instead with all the problems that entails.

I love the idea of micropayments, but Visa saw their widespread use as a direct threat to their bottomline, so they killed the technology to protect themselves. It’s all under the digital bridge now.

My Latest Attempt To Explain The Battle Royale Over ‘Wokeness’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Ok. Here goes. I think, at its heart, “wokeness” is really about white Christians flipping out that America is careening towards a majority minority nation and, as such, “wokeness” is a debate about that transition.

As such, the white Christian “powers that be” scream about “wokeness” as an effort to rally other white (angry) Christian (men) in an effort to establish permanent white Christian minority rule. It’s a dog whistle for their broader fears about not being in the majority anymore.

So, ANYTHING they don’t like is considered “woke” because they need some sort of catch-all for the bad vibes that white Christians feel as a majority of the country becomes brown, secular and feminist.

That’s all I got, at least.

I Have To Admit, Seeing The Petite Singularity Make Woke People Squirm Is Delicious

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I was listening to, I think, a Slate podcast about the Ozempic diet pill and I was struck by how they began to squirm at the consequences of it. I mean, if there comes a day when everyone can afford to just take a pill not to be fat….then all the woke ranting about “fat shaming” people will become moot.

You could hear, in real time, their natural woke tendency about how great and wonderful it is to be fat collide with the realization that growing numbers of people think it’s ok for OTHER people to be fat. But they, themselves, are willing to risk even cancer to be 10 or 20 pounds lighter.

Let me be clear — I have a beer gut and I need to lose 30 pounds. And I have no intention of doing anything other than eating better and / or exercising to lose that gut. And I’m indifferent to overweight people — you do you.

But there is a part of me that wistfully regrets that the olden days of us having places like the Victoria Secret Runway Show as a “safe space” for traditionally attractive people before all the fucking woke people decided to burn everything ground.

Now, with the Petite Singularity, it’s possible that in the near future, there really won’t be any excuse or reason for you to be fat. And then maybe we can have “normal” Victoria Secret Runway shows again.

The Sides Are Set

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

No amount of “owning the libs” or rhetorically “destroying” this or that MAGA person means jack shit. This is it, the two sides are set — and they’re hardening their positions.

There are just 100,000 people in four or five swing states who will ultimately decide if we have a civil war with Red States leaving the Union or a civil war with Blue States leaving the Union. Or, even more likely, we won’t have a civil war at all, but rather, we’ll just slip peacefully into autocracy.

America is in a serious, lingering rolling political crisis with no obvious endgame in sight. In short, the one thing we all want — to remain in a traditional Western democracy — is the one thing that is the absolute least likely to happen.

The United States is careening towards a very dark future, one way or another. I just can’t figure out which one. A lot is going to depend on Trump. If he is the Republican nominee, the likelihood of a civil war grows exponentially. If he is not the Republican nominee, then either he splits the vote and maybe — just maybe — Biden wins a second term and we punt our problems down the road again.

Or, Trump folds and supports DeSantis and we become an illiberal democracy like Hungary.

Anyway, I hope to wrap up my novel in time to flee the country with all the smug liberals. Wish me luck.

Finally Actually Watching Fleabag Instead of Just YouTube Clips

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Because of some dubious business practices by Amazon, I find myself with an Amazon Prime subscription AGAIN and, as such, I’m finally actually watching Fleabag instead of just YouTube clips.

Phoebe Waller-Bridge, “Fleabag”

Even from just watching clips, I’ve long loved the show and to actually watch it end to end proves that it really does live up its reputation. It’s really, really good. It’s probably in my top 5 TV shows of the last 20 or so years. And this is coming from someone who hates most TV with a passion.

I have repeatedly noted how interesting is to me that the British press focused on how feminist the show is, while the American press just sees it for what it is — a great TV show.

In the back of my mind, I find myself thinking about how I might crib from Fleabag as I continue to develop the female characters of my first novel. The thing about Fleabag is how thought-provoking and honest it is — sometimes to a fault.

The appear of Fleabag is a lot of people — both men and women — see themselves as a Fleabag character, even when we aren’t. It’s too bad there won’t be a third season of it.

It would be interesting to see the character in NYC or LA.

The Conundrum That Is America’s Immediate Future

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Something Big Is looming in America’s future — but what?

I honestly don’t know. It could go either way and by either way autocracy or civil war. I fear the nation is far more fragile politically than we’re willing to admit to ourselves.

I keep thinking about different scenarios for the future between now and, say, spring 2025 and the least likely is we’ll have a 2020 situation again where we somehow punt the problems that are tearing the country apart down the road one more election cycle.

At the moment, at least, it seems, Ron DeSantis (or some other non-Trump Republican figure) will become POTUS and we’ll slip peacefully into autocracy. That will be that.

We’ll wake up in 20 years and wonder why not only have we had the same POTUS for 20 years but why we’re invading Canada to save it from “wokeness.”

It’s all very curious. I have no ready answers as to what is going to happen to America. But I do have a lot of fears.

This Week’s ‘People Who Searched My Name On LinkedIn’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Here’s this week’s list of the types of people who searched for me on LinkedIn. Nothing really o f note, I don’t think, even though, in general, some of them are at least intriguing.

Top companies your searchers work at
WJW Architects
This seems pretty random. Why would someone working at an architect agency be searching for my name on Linkedin?

Dell EMC
I’m assuming this search comes from one of my technology-related posts.

Harvard Business Publishing Corporate Learning
Again, this probably has something to do with me ranting about AI here and there across the Internet

KYOBO BOOK CENTRE(교보문고)
Given what an unusual character I was in Seoul, this one makes my heart skip a beat. The idea that people in South Korea might STILL be talking about me is rather alarming.

Top job titles of your searchers

Administrative Employee  25%
I dunno.

Illustrator  25%
Cool, but I dunno.

Founder  12.5%
Intriguing.

Project Manager  12.5%
Really interesting, but why they would be interested in me is pretty much a mystery.

Service Delivery Specialist  12.5%
I dunno. Seems pretty random.

I’m Wading Into Dangerous Territory As A Male Author By Making My Heroine A Feminist

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m finally, finally, FINALLY, beginning to do some of the long-delayed reading I’ve been aiming to do to make my novel better. At the moment, I’m reading some feminist literature in hopes of credibly having my heroine be a feminist. It’s a lot of fun because if I do it right, women in the audience will dig it.

Look at me (on the right) a budding feminist literature reader.

Of course, if I do it WRONG, they wrong the book across the room in disgust at how presumptuous a smelly boy was to think he could not only write from a female POV — but write about feminism, as well.

But that’s part of the fun of writing a novel to begin with. Seeing if you can go outside your comfort zone by writing about things you don’t know first hand is a real challenge — and also really fun.

I’m well aware that, by definition, there will be women or (wymxn) who will get REALLY ANGRY that a boy is attempting to do what I want to do. But, lulz, I’m not afraid of the devil as my late mother often said of me.

If nothing else, this particular challenge makes me feel like I’m growing into the role of being an actual professional author, not just a notice who dreams of being a novelist.

2025: Am I Going To Be Antifa In A MAGA Fascist State?

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Unlike most fucking keyboard warriors on Twitter, I have enough strength in my convictions that should the worst happen and we turn into a MAGA fascist state in 2025, I’m prepared to risk my life and sacred honor in the real fucking world.

I only say this because I’m something of a loudmouth crank and it’s inevitable that if things get as bad as I fear that I’ll round afoul of either autocrat Trump or autocrat DeSantis

So, there you go. Whatever that means in real terms, I’m prepared to live that new, scary existence. I’m just never, ever going to be a “Good German,” whatever that means for me once the United States is an autocracy. HOPEFULLY, I will have written a breakout first novel by that point and maybe that will give me the funds the get the fuck out of the country.

I will be able to a guest on all the Left-leaning podcasts that will be produced in the south of France once all the fucking smug liberals have left the country. In fact, I’m looking forward to being a smug liberal expat. That would be kind of fun, if late in life.

And, again, I could still be wrong — no fate but what we make and all that. It could be that, just like with 2020, the hand of God will step in and somehow allow us to punt all these existential problems we have down the road one more election cycle.

I have my doubts, but you never know.