Talk To Me Internet: We’re In A Crisis #TrumpRussia #Resist

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Talk to Me Internet
We’re in a crisis when it comes to #TrumpRussia and the next few days will be significant. There’s not much we can do about it. It will be interesting to see what #Mueller does on Monday. #Trump may freak out and do something crazy. I am also worried that Hillary Clinton is in real danger because of Trump’s insane behavior.

Talk To Me Internet: Of #Gab & #UraniumOne

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I am really concerned that something tragic is going to happen because of the insane Uranium One rhetoric coming out of places like Gab. It’s simply completely bonkers and there’s nothing we can do about it. It’s all leading us down a slippery slope that could endup with some truly horrible consequences that we can’t anticipate at this point.

Twitter & The End Of The American Republic

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Something really needs to be done about Twitter. Twitter is horrible. What makes it so bad is seems to aid and abet the most extreme voices being heard at the cost of more moderate ones. It’s all very sad. And, at least in the near term, there doesn’t seem to be anything we can do about it.

America suffered a terrorist attack of sorts last year during the 2016 election cycle and we’ve done, in real terms, to address it. This is so because of a complex assortment of problems in the American political system which in historical context can leave one aghast.

The key take away is that in the short term we’re screwed. Because of gerrymandering and a continuing meme war on the part of Russian trolls and bots, not to mention Donald Trump’s unhinged yet oddly effective divide and conquer government style there simply is nothing we can do for the next few years. It could be a decade before anything is done, in real terms, to fix these systemic problems.

Really, if we wanted to fix one of the problems associated with our bizarre political system right now, we would get Google — or the US Government for that matter — to buy Twitter. Have the Federal government buy Twitter and implement some basic, much needed reforms to the service. Or, really, shut it down. Maybe if we shut Twitter down something much better would pop up to replace it.

It’s obvious that we need something like Twitter. It’s just that Twitter does such a bad job of service it’s technological and media space that it’s doing real damage to our politics and civil society. Given the stakes, I don’t think it would be too much to ask for it to be a lot harder to make a Twitter account. Maybe everyone on Twitter should have to be verified?

I still like the idea I’ve long proposed where you might have “Groups” in a hypothetical replacement service that could only be created by verified accounts. Within these Groups you’d have threaded “Discussions” that anyone could participate in. It would be kind like a mish-mash Reddit and Twitter, but really simply an update of the old Usenet concept. But, really, the point is to make it more difficult for bots and paid trolls to attack the United States political system during a campaign cycle.

But there just doesn’t seem to be anything, in the short term, that we can do about the problem. Nothing at all. We’re screwed. Nothing is going to happen because no one wants to do anything about it. If we don’t do something about it, however, we run a real risk irrevocable damaging being inflicted on the American Republic. Now that it’s been established that the Russians can screw around with our election system, what’s to stop some other nation from following in their footsteps?

Really, at this point, nothing. The American Right is so callow, Vichy and power hungry while the American Left is so busy imploding that in real terms there is nothing that can or will happen in the short term. We’re stuck with what we got for two, four, even eight more years at the least. We need some leadership and I don’t see that happening anytime soon, sorry to say.

‘I Wanna See Trump’s Pee-Pee Tape’ — #Lyrics To A Novelty Song

These are just bonkers lyrics I feel like writing. They will never be produced, but I feel like telling this story. The music to this would be something like Shelia E’s Bell Of St. Mark. But you would probably with the proper composer not make it so obvious.

I Wanna See Trump’s Pee-Pee Tape
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

Trump was in Moscow doing his thing
it was the Miss Universe Pageant as I recall
he was in his hotel room when a thought occurred
he wanted to besmirch the sheets that Obama had slept on
so he brought some women in to do the job

I wanna see, I wanna see, I wanna see
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape

Trump says he’d never do such a thing
that nothing like this would ever cross his mind
but we all know he’s a liar and this is all true
I wanna see, I wanna see, I wanna see
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape

so we all know in our hearts
know it be true
that the Russians have dirt on Trump
that they’re hanging over his head
telling him what to do from behind the scenes
all because he wanted hookers to piss on Obama’s bed

I wanna see, I wanna see, I wanna see
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape

[bridge]
one day, one day soon we all know
that tape will be released by the Russians
and we’ll see it in all its glory
but until then let me sing with all my heart

I wanna see, I wanna see, I wanna see
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape
I wanna see Trump’s pee-pee tape

‘Mr. Wittes’ Baby Cannon’ — #Lyrics To A Woke Pop-Rock Song

Benjamin Wittes has a “baby cannon” he shoots whenever there’s some big news in the whole Trump Russia imbroglio. So, with that in mind, here are some lyrics to a “woke” pop-rock song about it. As usual, this is just a first draft and I don’t really have a beat so, it’s more of a poem intended to, at some point, to be sung.

Mr. Wittes’ Baby Cannon
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

it may be very small
but it has a powerful shot
tells us when the next revelation has arrived
whenever it goes boom
you know Trump is rushing around the room
not knowing what to do

Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon
tells you the time of day
Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon
it’s time for the Post or Times
to drop some news into our lap
and that’s a fact

what will it be today
all we know is there is a drip, drip, drip
that needs to be released in a powerful way
each day seems as though we’re going to be blown away
Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon let’s us know
we’re growing closer to the truth
soon enough it will go boom with one last gasp

we’re not going to have to wait long
soon enough the cannon will be all grown up
and Trump will feel the cannon’s roar in his rump
but until that day
we have to feel the pain of Trump’s reign

Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon
tells you the time of day
Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon
it’s time for the Post or Times
to drop some news into our lap
and that’s a fact

[bridge]
one day this cannon will go off
for the very last time
history will turn on a dime
return us back to when things were fine

until then we wait
debate the meaning of it all
trying to figure out
where these cannon balls will fall
I would try to tell you
but I don’t have the gaul

Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon
tells you the time of day
Mr. Wittes’ baby cannon
it’s time for the Post or Times
to drop some news into our lap
and that’s a fact

Apocalypse 9/11 Redux: The Moment War Starts In Korea, Everything Changes

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

For those of us who were alive and politically active on that Tuesday, Sept. 11, 2001, we remember what was going on when we opened our eyes that morning before the towers were struck. The Bush Administration was coasting on fumes as was the economy. It seemed as though we were about to enter a recession and Bush would get blamed for it.

Then everything changed.

We woke up eight years later and realized we had been in a waking dream, a nightmare we couldn’t escape.

Now, about 20 years later, we find ourselves on the cusp of a horrific war with the DPRK (North Korea.) Estimates are that 500,000 people would die the first month of such a war and who know how many could die if the war became protracted. And that’s working on the assumption that WMD aren’t used at some point. The DPRK has made it clear that they don’t even consider chemical and biological weapons WMD in the first place, so if they felt cornered they probably would use both gratuitously not just on South Korea but on Japan as well.

What makes all of this really scary is the United States has an unhinged president looking for an opportunity to fire Bob Muller, who may finally get to Trump’s tax returns. So, given how batshit insane the political calculus of the Trump Administration is, it wouldn’t take a lot to think they wouldn’t blink an eye at a cost of life and property needed to have the cover to fire Mueller and assure not only keeping Congress Republican, but come within shouting distance of winning re-election in 2020.

But, really, who knows.

It could go either way. But Trump’s behavior is sufficiently unhinged that it’s enough worry about. It’s enough to think seriously about a monumental wag the dog situation that would be a tragedy of unprecedented levels.

Korean War 2.0: DPRK, TrumpRussia, Ukraine & A Possible WWIII

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Something’s up. My spidy senses are tingling. I have grown very jaded and cynical about anything having to do with North Korea, but the curious statements coming out of the Trump Administration the last few days about the DPRK make me scratch my head a little bit.

I see the North Korea situation as a major gimme for Trump. It’s his huge backup fail safe should the TrumpRussia problem finally go China Syndrome and look like it’s going to end his administration. It may very well be that nothing happens. It could be that Trump will leave office in four to eight years and the DPRK will still be there and this long-term problem we have with them will be kicked down the road for another long bit.

Or…the Trump Administration is singling that they’re going to strike the DPRK in some way and let the chips fall where they will. Now, remember, the DPRK is very unpredictable and they very much want to survive, so the States might do some limited bombing and, well, nothing might happen.

Or, all hell will break loose and 500,000 people in Seoul and beyond might die in the first month of the conflict. Such an enormous regional war would have a dynamic all its own and some pretty amazing things might happen. It doesn’t take too much to think maybe Trump might use the DPRK to wag the dog. He might attack the North Koreans, sit back for them to freak out and in the ensuing chaos use pardon the hell out of people left and right and maybe even fire Bob Mueller along the way. There simply would be so much going on in Washington D.C. and beyond that the press wouldn’t be able to keep up. Add to this the possibility that Trump doing this might be seen by Russia as a green light to attack Ukraine in a big way — not to mention whatever Iran might cook up — and you have the makings of something that would be marketed by the American press as WWIII.

Or not. I am so jaded that I have a feeling the whole kick-the-can-down-the-alley option is what is going to happen with the DPRK. It would be so callus, so transparent if Trump wagged the dog with the DPRK at this point that, well, I don’t quite know what to think of that prospect. That Trump would use the potential death of half a million people — at least — as political cover to save his own presidency kind of blows my mind. But it would make a lot of sense. By the time the States finally got around to winning the war in three to six months, TrumpRussia would be a forgotten scandal and Trump would be in a strong position to win the mid-terms and potentially a second term.

But so much could go wrong with a war with the DPRK that I just don’t know. I just don’t know if I’m reading too much into all of this or what. I can’t get a handle on it. I think everything is going to work itself out and nothing is going to happen. The alternative is to horrible and bloody to brood on for too long. I mean, the Chinese and the Russians could get involved, the DPRK could attempt to bomb Japan. Or they could attempt to nuke Seoul in some sort of blackmail situation. Wars are easily started and difficult to end as the old adage goes and Korean War 2.0 would be no different.

Only time will tell, I guess.

Ok, Intelligence Community: You Say, ‘Time To Buy Popcorn’….But Why?

By Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

So, all these people seemingly in the know are atwitter on Twitter about Something Big about to come out. Something big enough that we should all buy some popcorn to enjoy it with. It seems a lot of people know about it from a wide spectrum of types of people because people on both the Left and the Right are kinda beginning to freak out.

That makes me believe that either there’s something floating around in secret that’s about to pop out, the intelligence community knows something we don’t, or some reporters are about to break a big, big story. What this super-secret information could be, however, remains a mystery.

I’m thinking it has something to do with TrumpRussia. If I got way too excited, I would go so far as to say it was the notorious “pee tape.” But, more likely it’s something that can easily be rationalized out of existence by the Sean Hannnity’s of the world. Or not even rationalized out of existence, just spun so hard that they will collectively shrug their shoulders and tell us it’s both fake news and no big deal even if it was true.

Regardless, it seems as though both sides know about it and are prepping their respective audiences for it to drop and drop soon. I have no idea how “soon” it is or how big it is. But it’s coming. It will be interesting to see how entertaining and important it actually turns out to be.

Let’s Talk Trump, Collusion & What Happens Next For The Resistance

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

It pains me to say this, but the Right is, in real time and right in front of our eyes, processing the fact that Trump probably really did collude with the Russians and by the time the process is over they will say they’re cool with it and we should just move on.

Let that sink in for a moment.

So, if you think that when and if collusion on the part of Trump and or his “satellites” is proven that we’re all going to hold hands and collectively get rid of Trump, you got another thing coming. There won’t even be a moment of silence on the part of assholes like Sean Hannity. They won’t even skip a beat. They will have their talking points prepared, they will rationalize it out of existence and for them, at least, there won’t even be a hiccup.

Let that get through your haze of fury when it is one day — maybe sooner than you think! — proven that Trump is, relative to previous standards of such things a fucking traitor. The Vichy Republicans are going to suck Trump’s treasonous cock so hard that they’re going to gag. All they care about is power. All they care about is winning the argument of the moment. They don’t care about the country, they don’t care about you and your patriotic feelings. They just care about keeping Trump president for as long as possible.

I used to think that there would be the Pence Pivot if Trump was proven to be a traitor. But given what’s going on with the Right right now, that won’t even happen. They’re going to stick with Trump until the sun burns out. And, given the evils of gerrymandering, it’s possible nothing will ever happen to Trump. He will not only survive, but prosper.

He will prosper because people like me will waste months of our time being furious about Trump’s collusion as he pushes through insane Federal judges, even more insane legislation and executive orders. So, really, we’re fucked. The only fucking thing that’s going to save our sorry asses is some sort of magical Blue Wave in 2018. Think of all the horrific damage Trump and his ilk can do to the nation between now and — at the earliest 2019. That’s only if we’re able, as The Resistance, to overcome some big hurdles.

And it’s very possible that should we manage to get anywhere close to impeaching and convicting Trump that the real crazies will pop out of the woodwork, go mainstream and demand a few states leave the Union. I’m being completely serious. It’s possible that, like President James Buchanan, Trump’s the only thing stopping a real secessionist movement from happening now instead of later. In hindsight, just like the late 1850s, we will say that the late 2010s were obviously the moment in time when the nation was about to tear itself apart, it was just a matter of the conditions being right.

So, for the duration we are stuck with Trumplandia. We live in a dystopian present. Nothing is going to happen. And it’s very likely possible that it could be four or six or maybe never before Trump is impeached and convicted. And if he is, there could be consquences far beyond what we ever imagined.

I don’t have much hope in the short term. We’re fucked. Even if there is proof that Trump colluded in some way, the Right will have already processed it and moved on to something else. This is not fiction, this is reality. This is what’s really going on in America right now and there doesn’t seem to be much we can do about it for the time being. I would thus suggest we all take a deep breath and figure out ways to engage, not rage.

There doesn’t seem to be much other course of action for the time being.

‘Tick Tick Tick Tick Tick Tick….?’ What Gives, Benjamin Wittes?

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Is something big about to drop today, or nah? Benjamin Wittes, someone in the know, as they say, is being rather coy with a ticking tweet. It’s all very frustrating. What could that possibly mean? Is it something big-good like Jim Comey has tapes that back him up or something big-bad like Justice Kennedy retiring?

It’s all very frustrating.

I want answers, I need answer.

Maybe it’ll happen today, maybe it won’t.

We’ll see, I guess.