‘Lift This Cloud’ — Lyrics To An Anti-Trump Country-Pop Ballad

In my imagination, these lyrics would go with music similar to something like “Girl Crush” or “Million Reasons.” Something slow and melodic. Of course, you’d have to be kind of sly about how the lyrics are anti-Trump given that your typical country music listen probably would proudly consider themselves in the “basket of deplorables.”

Lift This Cloud
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
please give credit if you producer or perform

lift this cloud over our love
lift this cloud over our home
lift this cloud that I so bemoan
please lift this cloud
please lift this cloud
please lift this cloud

the rain seems on its way
it’s going to pour and pour
drive you away from me
the one I love and adore
please lift this cloud
please lift this cloud
for me

looking up at the sky
it seems though the cloud is here to stay
so lift that cloud as only you can
lift the cloud I say out loud
hoping you may listen to my plea

wish you’d call off this pain
with you’d call of this rain
lift this cloud
that’s giving me pain
without a doubt

let’s come together and hope
we’ll lift the cloud together
together so I don’t feel like a dope
we’re all going to find love again one day
this, at least, I pray

The Fire Next Time: How To Prevent The Russians From Hacking The Next Election

by Shelton Bumgarner

I have already proposed some fanciful Constitutional fixes when it comes to how to prevent a foreign power, namely the Russians, from hacking into our election system. But is there any more practical manner to do that? One issue is that our system is so open that it’s difficult to come up with any fix that wouldn’t cause more harm than good.

In other words, just like building a wall is applying a sledge hammer to a social issue unnecessarily, so, too, the most obvious way to fix the issue of the Russians hacking into our election system: significant increase in regulation of the Internet would too easily be abused or other purposes. And that doesn’t even begin to address the issue of how it probably wouldn’t stand up to Constitutional scrutiny.

So, it seems like we’re fucked.

In desperation, if there was real political willpower to fix this problem, we might get the government to work in tandem with Twitter to lightly regulate bots and trolls from, say, six months out from election day. Something whereby we at least made it more difficult for Russian bots to fuck with people’s minds. But given that the Republicans are so completely Vichy when it comes to Donald Trump and the Russians, there simply is no willpower to do anything at all.

I honestly can’t think of any scenario where the issue of how to prevent Russians from hacking into our election cycle will be fixed anytime soon for any reason. It’s only going to get worse. It seems as though for the foreseeable future something we take for granted — free and fair elections — are, in fact, in danger and for once the problem isn’t even self-inflicted.

It’s all deep. It’s all very deep.

‘Honest Loyalty’ — Lyrics To Anti-Trump Ballad

One thing about Trumplandia is it constantly churns out song titles and lyrics. So, this would be a slow Radiohead type ballad of the OK Computer era. That’s the type of music I would like for this song, though the title does suggest something more akin to a mid-80s pop ballad or even a Bernie Taupin – Elton John type song. Anyway, I need to vent about Trumplandia in verse and you get this. This would be a romantic duet, the more I think about it. The whole Trump – Comey thing would be kind of a subtext.

Honest Loyalty
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

you want me to kiss your ring
make me only sing your tune
I refuse to give you want you want
nothing will change I’m afraid
though you ask for my loyalty

[chorus – both]
I’m only prepared to give you
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
take it or leave it

I vow to give you the world
if you give me your loyalty
give me what I crave
make it clear
you’ll always be mine
the rest will be divine

[bridge — both]
we thought we’d always be together
thought things would always break out way
but it seems as though only dismay
will hold sway

[chorus – both]
I’m only prepared to give you
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
take it or leave it

‘Covfefe’ — Lyrics To An Anti-Trump Pop-Rock Protest Song

I have been reluctant to use this blog to write lyrics, but I enjoy writing lyrics too much, so even though for obvious legal reasons none of the lyrics I write will obviously ever be produced — the whole system of song writing is designed to prevent people like me from breaking into it — I have decided to write lyrics again anyway. The music for these lyrics in my imagination would be a peppy pop song. You would be so busy dancing that you wouldn’t really notice the lyric were kind of serious.

lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

walking down the street
smiling from my head to my feet
there’s a word that comes to mind
whenever I think of the blue wave
that will come crashing down on
our heads on election night my friend

covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
don’t let me waste your time
covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
what it means only we two know
late at night when love flows

but the people all around
think with my smile I’m a clown
I know, though, the cold hard truth
that only victory in November will do

covfefe means everything and nothing
as you can tell
it’s the word to wish someone well
when the blue wave reaches our shores
we’ll scream and shout and ask for more

covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
don’t let me waste your time
covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
what it means only we two know
late at night when love flows

what more can I do
what more can I say
but covfefe, covfefe, covfefe

things will soon be done
we’ll have our day in the sun
here’s what I want to exclaim
covfefe, covfefe, covfefe

While We’re All Distracted By Comey, Rome Is Burning

by Shelton Bumgarner

While we’re all eating our popcorn at the flaming dumpster fire that is the Trump Administration, the traditional social safety net that we’ve come to enjoy is being attacked in unprecedented ways. The issue for me is, regardless of whatever else is going on with Trump, his mere continued political presence is doing real harm to the American Republic.

An there is no reprieve in sight.

I say this because really, Trump is not going anywhere. The Vichy Republicans are so prostrate, so callow, so complicit in their support of someone — Donald J. Trump — who could be, in fact, effectively a foreign asset, that they are using whatever they can get to destroy important aspects of our government.

Or, put another way, it was inevitable that Republicans would again, at some point, be in power again by winning a presidential election and because of technology and the bullshit mountain known as FOX News, so the victory of Trump only, in a sense, sped the process up.

There is a more fundamental issue at work. That issue is because of tribal politics, we are, for the foreseeable future, going to swing back and forth in extremes. This all goes back to the question of, what exactly is the source of this. Why is the right so hysterical? Does it only have to do with the changing demographics of the United States?

The rise of Trumplandia is truly a nightmare scenario. That a major liberal democracy would fall under the sway of someone like Trump, for whatever reason, is pretty mind boggling. I am trying my best to avoid invoking Hitler’s name, but I can’t get around it. There is nothing else I can think of to compare it to.

Or put another way, the only thing that’s stopping Trump from being an American Hitler is he’s so completely incompetent that he can’t effectively impliment is more fascist, autocratic desires. That’s it, folk. That’s all that stands between America and fascism — Trump isn’t up to the job.

So, really, we are just going to have to wait until the mythical “Blue Wave” flips Congress before the pendulum swing back to sanity. It is to be seen how much damage Trumplandia will be able to wreak on the Republic. Probably significantly more than we ever imaged.

But I still have hope that once we finally do flip Congress that things will sort themselves out. But we have a long, long, long time to wait. We really need to just keep our powder dry and try to stay engaged. Don’t allow yourself to get burnt out from all the drama. That’s what Trumplandia wants. They want us to succumb to a “managed democracy.”

America has the strongest civil society in the world, so the cancer, the infection that is Trumplandia is being fought off as hard as possible by its antibodies. But there is only so much those antibodies can do. We’re just screwed.

At least in the near term, we’re screwed. Just try to stay engaged with people who disagree with you. That’s pretty much all we can do at this point. Trump’s sway over the nation is complete giving how Vichy the Republicans are and so for the time being he effectively has no check, no balance.

So try to keep focused on the real issues at hand. Keep an eye on what the Vichy Republicans are doing when it comes to Dodd-Frank and Obamacare. Once Trumplandia is finally vanquished, we’re going to have a lot of work to do to make America great like it was before Trump became president.

A Hot Take On James Comey’s Testimony

by Shelton Bumgarer

While in some ways today lived up to the hype, in other, more fundamental ways I found it rather underwhelming. I found it underwhelming because the thing I had hoped for — some sort of iconic statement that would prove the final death knell of the Trumplandia experience simply did not happen.

And, alas, it seems as though it just isn’t going to happen.

What is really beginning to sink in — yet again — is how difficult it is to get rid of an American president once he’s in office. So, as long as there are no tapes — be they of a pee nature or otherwise — I have a growing fear that Trumplandia will be a fixture of the American political landscape for at least two years, if not much, much longer.

It seems to me that we’re in for a chronic case of Constitutional Crisis that will flair up every once in a while for the forseeable future. We’ve entered the age of tribal politics and the Republicans are so Vichy, so callow, so complicit in the rise of Trumplandia that they simply won’t do anything to ameliorate the situation until they are absolutely forced. It will nearly take the hand of God himself for Vichy Republicans to look past the base and put country over party.

It’s a sad fact, but given how it seems as though the GOP is hellbent on dragging James Comey’s reputation through the mud that that is exactly what is going to happen. There just aren’t any easy answers to how to fix the problems associated with Trumplandia. We’re stuck with it.

So, while the Comey hearing was dramatic and riveting, it did not really give me the political release that I was looking for. I didn’t get that perfect moment that could be used to end the cancer that is the Trump Administration.

If anything, it reminded me that we’re barely at the end of the beginning when it comes to this scandal. And, remember, to date, most of the damage inflicted on the Trump Administration has been self-inflicted. So, even though a fish rots from its head, it is almost inevitable that Trump will eventually untangle this clusterfuck of a presidency enough to survive, if not prosper.

Really, all we need is a war with the DPRK or Iran and suddenly everything will have worked itself out and the Tsar-a-Largo problem will be put on the backburner to such an extent that we won’t even remember it. And, remember, if a hayseed rube like me out in the sticks and see that possible out, then definitely Steve Bannon sitting in the White House can see it.

Thus anyone who is getting all excited about the prospect of getting Trump anytime soon should chill out. It’s just not going to happen for at least two years. That is the bare minimum. He could be around a lot longer than that. Much longer.

Therefore, all I can say is if you really want to end the Trumplandia Era, you need to engage, not rage against people who disagree with you politically. That’s it. That’s the only way it’s going to happen. It will be tough and you’ll be called a cuck and much worse by members of Trumplandia, but in the end it will be worth it. I swear.

Trumplandia As The Singularity’s Political ‘Event Horizon’

By Shelton Bumgarner

It seems very possible that the source of all the fear and “social anxiety” that has allowed an unstable racist, misogynist, bigot demagogue to rise to power in the United States might be laid at the feet of some sort of slow-moving technological singularity.

The reason why I suggest this is there must be some sort of reason for people being so afraid of the changes taking place in society. Those changes are happening so fast, in part, because of technology. So, maybe things are going to hell in a hand basket so quickly because, well, things are moving too fast for normal civil society to process it.

One could make the case that both Communism and Nazism came about by the fast pace of change that took place in the early 20ths Century. A lot happened technologically in the 1910-1940 period of time and since, say, about 1990 things have really begun to speed up again.

I have given it some thought, and the modern era really began with wide-spread adoption of the smartphone. And, really that’s the thing that allowed modern social media to take off. And this, of course, doesn’t even address the secondary effects of this slow moving technological Singularity that I suggest is taking place. I mean, self-driving semi-trucks haven’t hit the road yet, but we all know they’re coming.

Additionally, things like 3-D printing and nanotechnology will bring even more political change in the coming years. It isn’t too difficult for someone to wrap these technological changes up in an ideology and use them as a blunt force against the traditional post-war neo-liberal capitalist system.

The only thing that has saved us from that potentially destructive thing happening right now is Donald Trump and by extension Trumplandia doesn’t have an ideology.It’s just a rage against all change and it would make sense that the change it’s raging against is, in fact of a Singularity-like change.

So not only are people raging against the fast pace of social change caused by us approaching the Singularity, their rage, in a sense, is being channeled by the very technology that’s causing the trouble in the first place. Social media is not only causing great social change, it is also causing a Darwinian battle in the market place of ideas whereby only the strongest, most extreme ideas thrive.

Thus, the tribal politics that has infected American civil society could best be described as tech-tribal politics. In a way, one could say that while we’ve not reached the Singularity by any means, we have reached its Event Horizon. We’re now finally eternally locked in its gravitational field. Or put another way, we might, in a 100 years, look back and say the election of Donald Trump was the moment when the soon-to-come Singularity started to warp civil society in a demonstrative manner.

To go back to the issue of how this might be used in an ideological manner, it would make a lot of sense if today’s Trumplandia turned into something even more destructive, even more corrosive and even more dangerous to the world order. The barbaric populism and nationalism of Trumplandia might eventually evolve as we grow ever-closer to the Singularity into something more akin to technologically Maoism or Trotskyism. That these long-dead and horrible ideologies might pop back up is shocking to thin about, of course, but I doubt any of us have really given the political power of the Singularity a lot of thought.

We’re so busy daydreaming out how we’re going to upload our minds into computers and live forever, that we totally miss the idea that a demagogue like Donald Trump might lead a nation like the United States down a dark and scary path once the Even Horizon of the Singularity has been reached. You can tall about a Universal Basic Income all you like, but given the tribal politics of the United States, it’s highly unlikely to ever happen, even once automation and robotics take all the jobs.

That is, of course, when we all look at each other and ask, “Now what?”

Answer that question will be the biggest problem faced by modern liberal democracies in the years and decades to come. There just isn’t an easy answer and into that void someone like Trump — or hell, even Trump himself given how fast things are moving now — will come crashing in and lead us all into a dark, scary time not seen since the 1930s.

Interestingly enough, once this process is over, the very idea of the nation-state may fade and the world will be divided into ethno-spheres. But the process of cracking the existing order to do that might involve huge numbers of people dying.

Hopefully the process will be significantly less destructive than what brought about today’s existing order, but there are no assurances. Trumplandia has sped up our political hurdling towards the technological Singularity and we all have to be prepared for the shake up that is to come.

We live in extraordinary times and Trump isn’t going anywhere. By the time the system finally gets unglued, no sooner than two years from now, some truly momentous things may have happened. Weirdly enough, for a movement build on rejecting the fast pace of change during the Obama years, Trumplandia itself is now set to really shaking things up in a manner that may take decades for us to process.

Shelton Bumgarner is the editor and publisher of The Trumplandia Report. He may be reached at migukin (at) gmail.com.

Testimony or Trump Speech? That Is The Question

By Christian Howard

I like many other Americans are facing quite the predicament in my schedule on Thursday. For weeks I had been anticipating James Comey’s testimony, but it seems our dear president will be delivering a speech at the Faith and Freedom event. Isn’t that rather coincidental?

Comey will begin testifying at 10:30 A.M. and Trump’s speech should commence at 12:30 P.M. Now I’m going to put a rather bold prediction out that Comey will still be testifying against Trump in court long after Trump’s little speech. It can’t be too long that Trump rattles on before running out of words. Hey, maybe I’ll even be able to tune into both.

In all seriousness however, I’m anxious to hear what the former FBI director has to say. Scattered comments and stories have come out across the news from Comey, but now he will speak on a direct platform in a court of law. Did Trump really attempt to obstruct justice? Probably. But the real question is if Trump will face the consequences for his actions. This election and administration has drained my optimism and I doubt Trump will be charged despite any amount of evidence.

Besides what actually happens if Trump is charged, more evidence is uncovered, and an impeachment hearing proceeds? If Trump does face impeachment the national will gain a much more competent president and one that can effectively push their destructive agenda. Our president is currently making a mockery of democracy, defacing our ties with other countries, and has ultimately made us an international embarrassment, but without really achieving anything he set out too.

The wall isn’t constructed, the travel ban is locked up in legality, and ISIS is still running wild after his ingenious 30 day plan. Really the area he has been most effective in is simply just blocking and negating progress. As seen from his refusal to sign the Paris Accord, work with other leaders, and a possible NAFTA withdrawal. I guess I have to give Trump credit where it’s due and also declare him a Twitter master.

Speaking of Twitter, if you aren’t able to make Donnie’s speech because of the Comey hearing, he may have set up a nice, interactive activity for the viewers. Insiders from the White House have informed the press that Donald is planning to be live tweeting during the Comey testimony. I’m assuming this is just in case Comey attempts to spread any fake news and old Donald has to set him straight.

Trump’s lawyers are urging him not to take to Twitter, though he seems pretty adamant on doing just that. I for one hope Trump rightfully defends himself on social media and is able to expose the truth behind the investigation. Honestly though, I just can’t wait for the goldmine that is Trump’s Twitter tomorrow if he does follow through with this and seeing if Trump can actually get himself into trouble while actively trying to avoid it.

America has finally fully embraced its celebrity and reality television culture to the whole to the point where Donald Trump is my president. Well now I guess I sit back and watch and see what spicy drama stirs up after tomorrow. I urge all to watch Comey’s testimony and have a look for themselves at what our president is hiding.

Fanciful Constitutional Fixes To A Hacked Election

by Shelton Bumgarner

We have no idea right now, for sure, if the Russians successfully hacked the American election through the Internet. We just don’t know. And we probably never will. But, for the sake of argument, what would be the proper reaction to this revelation.

Well, first of all, you can talk about how there should be reforms until you’re blue in the face, but the Vichy Republicans, because both control the government and benefited from the hacking, it’s not like they have any reason to effectively fix the problem.

But let’s suppose something happened and they finally cracked, they finally were absolutely forced to do something, what could they — and we — do? Because we’re dealing with some really serious stuff — Constitutional stuff — fixing the problem would be doubly difficult.

Really, the fixes I can think of are Constitutional in nature.

The one big fix I could see maybe being done is passing a Constitutional amendment making the process of electing a president a Federal issue. This will never happen, of course, but it’s something to think about. But only by removing the electing of the president from 50 individual states can we make it less likely that someone could attack the weaknesses of the weakest one.

But, like I said, this will never happen. There just isn’t the political will for such a huge change to the way we elect presidents. If I had the power, though, I would also get rid of the Electoral College as well. It’s a horrible method of electing a president in modern times and it needs to go. But that, too, will never happen.

One thing people really need to chill out about is the notion of “nullifying” the 2016 election. To call such a proposal a delusional daydream is giving it too much credit. We just have to wait until 2018 to have an effective “do over.” That’s the way the system works and it’s just too bad that the Vichy Republicans are so callow and prostrate before King Trump that the system isn’t working right now.

The whole thing is enough to make one a little sad.

Trumplandia’s Motto: ‘Malevolence Tempered by Incompetence’

by Shelton Bumgarner

I have been searching for the origin of the concept that Trumplandia is “malevolence tempered by incompetence” and I think it came from Lawfare Blog. Regardless, it’s perfect. It sums up the world we live in today. If Donald Trump was, say, in any way qualified to be president, the damage he could inflict on all of us would be truly dystpian.

Yet, he’s so bad at his job that he can’t do any of the things he’s threatened to do. So, while he can still inflict some serious harm to democratic norms and the Republic in general, he is a really, really bad leader and may, in fact, be daft.

That incompetence is all that stands between us and all-out fascism is something to worry about a great deal. It’s something very troubling and it will be a minor miracle. I mean, imagine the history of Nazi German if Hitler simply was so incompetent that he couldn’t muster the government to actually inflict harm on anyone, much less Jews.

But that is the world we live in. It really is.

That was the part that we totally missed during the election when rhetoric was running high and people like me were really scared that the worst would happen. We simply had no idea how bad at governing Trump would be. He’s really bad, really, really bad. You have to look no farther than his incessant tweeting to see how bad he is. He tweets about things in ways that not only give us painful insight into his thinking in real-time, it also does a huge amount of damage to his drive to turn the American Republic in a “managed democracy” run via executive orders.

Regardless, only time will tell if any of this will change. Only time will tell if Trump will get his act together and begin to use the levers of power to enact the darker aspects of the Trumplandian vision.