Ugh. Am I Going To Have to Watch Saltburn?

by Shelt Garner

My Tik-Tok FYP is ablaze with people talking about Emerald Fennell’s super weird and kinky movie Saltburn. I’m all for such things in art, but…ugh…it took me forever to see Pulp Fiction — which I now love — because of some of the scenes I heard about.

As I’ve grown older, I’ve become even more squeamish about uncomfortable fiction. I really hate conflict to the point that the only way I can deal with it is if I’m the one creating it for an audience. Otherwise, ugh, leave me out of it. But, here I am, seriously thinking about watching Saltburn.

Let me note that it is hard to deny that it’s movies like Saltburn that really aggravate the culture wars. I can’t even broach the subject of the movie with my conservative relatives because I can’t even begin to describe to them what it’s even about.

So. I dunno. There’s room enough in this world for all God’s chillens is all I can say. Watch Saltburn or don’t, I don’t care. But I am going to take a DEEEEP BREATH — and maybe get drunk — then I’m going sit down and watch Saltburn.

I have a feeling I’m not going to get very far.

Author: Shelton Bumgarner

I am the Editor & Publisher of The Trumplandia Report

Leave a Reply