The Cultural Heatsink That Is Taylor Swift’s Album ‘Cardigan’

by Shelt Garner

Where to begin on this one. Taylor Swift is an excellent lyricist and among the most influential performers of her generation. And, yet, her latest album seems to be fan service.

There was all this buzz among the faithful, but I haven’t seen any buzz about it beyond that. I had to go out of my way to listen to it on Spotify. What I’ve heard of it so far is pretty good. Nothing unexpected. Pretty much what you would expect from someone like Taylor Swift at this point in her career.

It makes you wonder what this means. It seems like the lack of buzz for the album says more about the modern state of pop culture than it does her. And, really, what I might be noticing is she didn’t drop a video for any of the songs. Typically, a video would get some press over and above what one might expect from the usual Taylor Swift places.

I have to note that Taylor Swift sent Cara Delevingne and Kaia Gerber a two person cardigan to wear in honor of the album’s release. What the what? It’s surreal that no one has pointed out the obvious implications of this. Sounds a lot like if there is a romantic relationship between Ms. Delevingne and Ms. Gerber it’s obviously well known enough that Swift sent the two women such a gift. And, again, maybe I’m drawing a conclusion that isn’t supported by the facts. I’m more than willing to admit that possibility. But, let’s be honest, folks. Is it really credible to believe that someone like Ms. Delevingne would shoot a platonic selfie with a catch like Ms. Gerber? REALLY? In a two person cardigan of all things? REALLY?

Anyway. No one listens to me and they probably shouldn’t.

Back to Swift. I still wish she would assemble a female super group and go straight rock with it. But apparently, rock is dead and gone, never to return. Lulz?

Wait, What? Are Kaia Gerber & Cara Delevingne Dating?

by Shelt Garner

I’m simply a rando nobody in the rural portion of a purple flyover state. I don’t know anything about anything. Please actively ignore me. And maybe this speculation is a big “duh” to people who are more clued in than me, but it definitely seems as though Kaia Gerber and Cara Delevingne are dating.

The reason why I think this is there’s “normal world” and then there’s the tight little bubble of “showbiz world.” Or, in this particular situation, its subset “fashion world.” Both women are bombshells and Ms. Delevingne seems to bounce around a lot (no hating, she’s just doing what men do all the time — I’m looking at YOU Pete Davidson.)

But from Ms. Gerber’s side, it makes a huge amount of sense. She’s only 18 and she probably simply wants to sow her wild oats as quickly as possible — hence her brief relationship with — you guessed it — Pete Davidson. I guess because I’m ancient as all get out the fact that Cindy Crawford’s daughter may be dating female Lothario Cara Delevingne makes my eyebrows rise just a little bit. It takes a moment to process not because there’s anything wrong with it, just Ms. Crawford is such an icon that it takes my old brain a moment to fit into the new reality.

As an aside, I will note a picture exists of Cara Delevingne with BOTH Kaia Gerber AND Margaret Qualley. The latter two women both had brief relationships with Pete Davidson so it comes off as a little surreal. And in the picture Ms. Delevingne is making Ms. Qualley laugh for some reason.

Make of that what you will.

So, it seems as though it’s EXTREMELY LIKELY that Ms. Delevingne has beded both Ms. Gerber AND Ms. Qualley recently. It makes one’s head spin. But, remember, in the upper reaches of showbiz — especially fashion — same sex relationships are completely accepted (as they should be.) And let me stress — I’m simply making an informed observation. Maybe I’m pulling all of this out of my butt. I’m notorious for coming to the wrong conclusions, so this time is probably wrong, too.

The only reason why I even mention any of this is how showbiz news simply states things factually about Ms. Gerber and Ms. Delevingne as if it’s “Oh, you know, just two friends doing friends stuff. Nothing to see here.”

Maybe I’m wrong. I probably am. I wish both women well, regardless.