Tag: Pom Klementieff

This Pop Novel That Is Meant To Be An Old Brown Shoe For Stieg Larsson Fans Is Getting Really, Really Good

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m a storytelling snob. So much so, that it’s now nearly impossible for me to consume anyone else’s story. But, at last, I believe I may — may — have at last stumble upon a beginning to my novel that actually pleases even me.

Now, remember, I’m not nearly as dark as my hero Stieg Larsson. And it can be a real struggle for me to play it straight — I like to plop in some humor every now and again. I just can’t help myself.

Anyway. It is at least possible that things will zoom along at a pretty fast clip now. I’ve had to grit my teeth and break or bend some of the dumb arbitrary rules I’ve been using to write this novel simply so I can actually finish something, anything.

I am embarrassed by how long it’s taken me to get to this point. I now hope to finish the third draft in the February – March timeframe. Then I will have to figure out how to pay a manuscript consultant to help me take the thing to the next level.

The case could be made that my heroine looks kind of like Pom Klementieff.

What’s more all of this will be happening in the context of the United States careening towards autocracy or civil war / revolution starting in late 2024, early 2025 — just as I plan on querying the novel!

But I have hope. I hope that if I can sell this first novel, I will somehow be given the opportunity to not only write the other five planned novels, but also a few scifi novels I want to write. And maybe, if I’m EXTREMELY LUCKY, a few screenplays too.

But I’m old and they shoot writers, don’t they?

It’s At Least Possible That I May Have A Stable First Act

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

At LAST, it’s possible that I MAY have something akin to a stable first act. A lot of my problems with the first act are bullshit and arbitrary. From what my Beta Readers have told me, the issue for most people is they just want the story to flow and make sense.

My heroine KINDA looks like this.

All this futzing around with the specifics of scene sequence is not something that most readers notice or care about. They just want to be able to read the novel all the way through.

Now, issue that I’ve found myself worrying about is the number of spicy scenes in the first act. Too often, I’ve leaned into the nature of my heroine’s personal life to show some sexual activity and I just don’t know how much people will tolerate it — especially in the first act.

But I’m doing all of this in a vacuum. I just can’t keep spinning my wheels. I have to, at some point, realize that the point is to get this third draft done so I can go through and edit it.

So. As such, I’m trying to write as much as possible as quickly as possible now so I can get out of the first act by the end of October, 2023.

Pom Klementieff Is Such A Babe

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Only because of the latest Mission: Impossible movie have I come to realize what a babe Pom Klementieff is. I only knew her from the Guardians of the Galaxy movies but without all the green alien makeup — holy shit is she a babe.

Pom Klementieff

In fact, I THINK she’s probably about the right age to play the heroine of my first novel if, somehow, magically, it should one day be popular enough to be adapted into a movie. But I’m being extremely delusional at this point to even suggest such a thing.

And, yet Ms. Klementieff is kinda sort the right phenotype play the character. Of course, in reality in my mind my heroine is a younger version of Nicole Scherzinger. But, lulz. It’s not like anyone is ever going to care one way or another about it.

Nicole Scherzinger

I’m delusional enough, of course, think that’s possible.