Tag: Burn Hollywood Burn

Hollywood’s Post Human Future

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It definitely seems as though Hollywood is about to enter an era of transition not seen since that from silent movies to talkies in the mid-20s. As we careen towards a Petite Singularity based on the Chatbot Revolution it definitely seems the conditions are there for Hollywood as we know it to cease to exist within a few years.

I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts, “The Town” and the idea of that Hollywood tech could reach the point where there is no “uncanny valley” when it comes to resurrecting dead celebrities was broached. The person interviewed gave a very open ended, evasive answer, but the sentiment was clear — this revolution is well on its way.

As such, this raises a lot of very intriguing — and potentially alarming — consequences for not just Hollywood, but society as a whole. In fact, one could make the case that this revolution of Hollywood would be the point of the spear for an actual hard Singularity at some point in the near future.

What other indication that technology is officially going to fast for human culture to catch up than the idea that Hollywood will no longer really need humans at all. This could lead to the rather nightmarish scenario where entertainment is kind of forever fixed at some indeterminate “now” in which no new actors ever work their way through the ranks because every actor since the dawn of Hollywood can be conjured up at will.

Another, less depressing scenario is all of this leads to the theatre industry suddenly seeing a incredible resurgence. It could be that Broadway will be seen as the premiere “artisanal” creative outlet for actual human actors and instead of a starlet taking a bus to LA to start her career, she goes to Broadway. She builds enough buzz as a live actor that she catches the eye of those few Hollywood director still making movies the old fashion way.

The goal of her career would then be to make a big enough name for herself that she could get scanned for Hollywood and have her image plopped into all the movies being made with dead actors.

Anyway, the point is — the conditions are there, at least, for a huge disruption in showbiz in ways we can only begin to imagine.

Movie Pitch: ‘Bottom Rail’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

There is a famous anecdote from the very end of the Civil War when a former slave is claimed to have told a bunch of white people that, “bottom rail is on top now.”

Ok, here’s my movie pitch.

The movie opens with a montage about a virus that wiped out much — but not all — of humanity. After a lot of chaos, death and destruction, humanity manages to bounce back. But here’s the twist — white people are now in the minority and pretty much the entire globe is run by black and brown people.

You would have to be very careful how you approached this story, but in general, the point would be to confront white people in the audience with how systemic racism is real TODAY. The movie would be an excuse to highlight the macro social injustice that POC have to endure in our modern world.

You might suggest that white people in this future world are blamed for the the destruction of the old world and that only adds to the prejudice that they face. Now there are obvious risks to this move in the sense that Right wing nutjobs might completely miss the point of the story and latch on to it as a parable about the perils of illegal immigration.

Ugh.

This is why we can’t have nice things.

Anyway, it’s an interesting idea. It’s a more realistic end-of-the-word scenario than is in most fiction these days.

What Is Wrong With Me

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I have fallen into a horrible rut as I reach my 50th birthday. I love to produce media but I loath to consume it. But, as they say, if you have time to write you have time to read (or watch.) I have a new Netflix account and there are all these really good movies and TV shows to watch….and I just can’t get into them.

Meh. I don’t care. *I* want to be the person creating content for other people, not having to slog through some other person’s vision. It’s all very curious and frustrating. I need to get outside my comfort zone, expose myself to new ideas so when I do write content I have those new ideas rolling around in my mind.

It’s all very much a pain in the ass, especially as I yet again start from scratch on a new iteration of the second draft of my first novel. It should not be so difficult. All I have to do is plop myself in front of my laptop and watch something, anything, for longer than a few moments.

The last few TV shows I actually got into were 30 Rock, Mad Men and the first season of Stranger Things — otherwise, nada. This is so embarrassing. Some of it is I have a very specific taste in content to the point that if it doesn’t hit me just right…I can’t bear to watch it.

Anyway. It’s time for me to come to grips with the fact that I’m not some sort of man in a high castle. If I’m going to be a successful content creator, I have to CONSUME content as well. It’s very difficult because as I’ve grown older, I’ve all out of the habit of consuming ANY media outside of the occasional movie.

Ugh.

A Massive Plot Hole In ‘Glass Onion’ — SPOILERS!

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

Ok. I got a bone to pick with Rian Johnson about the latter part of what is otherwise a really great movie.

So, one of the key moments of the movie is someone gets shot. Then that weapon just magically is never mentioned again. What the what?

A group of people are trapped on an island with an murderous idiot with a loaded weapon and that murderous idiot just lets the plot unfold as if he doesn’t have a gun? What? We see the weapon shot twice, so if it had, say, six bullets you would have four more bullets that could be used to influence events. That doesn’t even address that issue that a handgun, by definition, can be used as a threat.

All I can say is Johnson is lucky I was so invested in how interesting the plot was that I was able to push that annoying “what happened to that gun?” feeling in the back of my mind out of the way long enough to finish the movie.

The MAGA Slogan ‘Go Woke, Go Broke’ Is Performative Bullshit — It’s Hollywood’s Poor Storytelling That’s The Problem

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Conservatives of all stripes feel really, really put upon by the “woke cancel culture mob.” They to the point that they are willing to destroy American democracy so they can use the hard power of the government to end the “wokeness” they perceive is hurting their feelings.

One of the favorite slogans of the MAGA New Right is “woke woke, go broke.” This is bullshit. It’s bullshit because it fits the narrative of the greater MAGA New Right echochamber of podcasts and Fox News. The issue isn’t so much that Hollywood has “gone woke” as it is showbiz has lost sight of their power: telling a good story.

I could watch a pretty “woke” movie without blinking an eye if it told me a good story and the representation that it strove for was organic to the story. It’s when the story is lacking that I start to roll my eyes, check my watch and dwell upon how the movie is trying to browbeat me with a “woke” message.

If the story was good — I wouldn’t care because I would be so engrossed by the tale I was consuming.

The issue is, of course, that America is cleaving into two nations, one Red, one Blue. And the moment Blues get as angry as Reds — that’s it, the country will probably have a National Divorce and, as such a Second American Civil War. At the moment, Blues are pretty oblivious to the dangers they face when the ascendance of Reds because Reds are such cry babies that you wouldn’t believe that they are going to push majority Blues out of the country with their extreme policies once they’re in power again.

But, here we are. There’s a real risk that that very thing might happen.

It’s all very bonkers and, as such, 2023 – 2025 could be one of the most turbulent eras in American history since 1865.

I Loved ‘Glass Onion’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I found myself drinking some pretty potent whiskey with some a new Netflix account and so the first thing I did was watch Glass Onion. Netflix left so very much money on the table by not giving this movie a wide and long theatrical release, but lulz.

While I would say that “Babylon” is my favorite film of the year, Glass Onion is my favorite movie of the year. Even though in hindsight the movie wasn’t nearly as interesting as it was as you watched it, while I watched it I was totally engaged. I was in the moment and the movie really did what a good movie does — give you interesting characters doing engrossing things.

All I can say is — Rian Johnson should stay as far away from the Star Wars franchise as possible. He is obviously not a fan of Star Wars and he is just not interested in what makes Star Wars so popular. But the man can direct a great murder mystery.

I say that the movie isn’t as interesting upon reflection because there just isn’t much in the way of red herrings. The person would assume did it, did it. There are a few left turns and misdirects now agan again, but in general…meh. But I have extremely high storytelling expectations and I loved Glass Onion. There was a compelling story and you wanted to know things would work out.

There were a few things I didn’t understand about this movie. Why was the character of “Whiskey” played but a non-name actress. I’m not picking on the actress who played the character, but she kind of faded into the background. I mean, imagine if Dua Lipa or even Kaia Gerber had played that character. Madelyn Cline is just sort of…there? I suppose that was kind of the point. They didn’t want a well known person to play the character so we our eyes wouldn’t be drawn to her.

Or something.

But, in general, I was extremely pleased. Highly recommend.

A Second Life For ‘Babylon?’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Even though I walked out just about at the 80% mark because the plot had become way too trite for my tastes, I really did enjoy Babylon. It was very much a spiritual successor to “The Wolf of Wall Street” in the sense that if you liked one movie you are very likely to enjoy the other.

Margot Robbie plays Nellie LaRoy and Diego Calva plays Manny Torres in Babylon from Paramount Pictures.

So, what happened?

What did the movie bomb so bad?

I guess marketing? But from the generally positive reactions to the movie I’m seeing from the hip-central that is Tik-Tok….I think you shouldn’t count Babylon out just yet. It’s possible that at some point the film will organically grow in popularity to the point that 20 years from now we’ll all assume it was a popular movie when it came out when, in fact, it definitely was not.

I don’t know when or how this transformation in fortunes might occur, but I do think that once people can watch the movie in the luxury of their own homes and it will likely grow in popularity. At least to a limited extent.

The movie is too good for it to be forgotten. It’s possible — not probable — that it might be a lot of Oscar nominations and maybe wins that ultimately save Babylon from itself.

How I Would ‘Fix’ The Movie Babylon

by Shelt Garner
@shetgarner

There was a lot for me to like about the movie Babylon. And, as I’ve written before, there were times — especially early in the movie — when I was really digging it. It was giving off “Wolf of Wall Street” vibes, in a good way, and I was prepared to make it one of my favorite recent movies.

Margot Robbie plays Nellie LaRoy and Diego Calva plays Manny Torres in Babylon from Paramount Pictures.

And….then….the movie’s plot became rather trite. How many times were we going to have to see Margot Robbie’s character screw up, only to get rescued? When the movie seemed to on course to replicate the famous fire cracker scene in Boogie Nights, I bounced out of the theatre.

But now that I’ve read on Wikipedia how the movie ended, I find myself wanting to “fix” it. And here’s what I’ve come up with.

Make the character arc of the Margot Robbie character one of redemption. Instead of time after time her screwing up and getting saved, why not use some of that time to prepare us for a redemption arc. In the end of the movie, she somehow straighten her life out and ends up living a long, long time.

In fact, maybe give her the last laugh with a faux documentary from the 1960s or something where she talks about the “good old days” and the transition from silent film to talkies.

Anyway, if nothing else, I was reminded by the movie the importance of strong character development.

A Hot Take On ‘Babylon’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Even though there were times as I watched “Babylon” that I thought it might the best movie of the year, it ultimately failed to the point that I walked out just around the time we entered the third act. I do this all the time with movies — walk out — so it’s not the insult you might think it is.

Margot Robbie plays Nellie LaRoy and Diego Calva plays Manny Torres in Babylon from Paramount Pictures.

It’s just I really, really hate a certain type of conflict in stories and because I felt the movie had kind of lost the thread by that point, I just couldn’t justify forcing myself to sit through a lot of bad things happening that I didn’t like. The chief thing that led me to this point is, sad to say, Diego Calva. He just couldn’t get me invested enough to go where ever director Damien Chazelle wanted to take me.

There came a point, near the very end of the movie when I gave up. Something about Diego Calva-as-Damien Chazelle proxy just wasn’t doing it for me. So I left the theatre before the movie ended, feeling not a little ashamed of myself. Before that point, I was really digging the movie. It’s Wolf-of-Wall Street level of excess was great and interesting.

I was enthralled by the 20-odd minute prelude before the title credit was shown. I was like, “If the rest of the movie is this good, I might actually finish a movie for once.”

And whenever Brad Pitt or Margot Robbie were on the screen I was totally invested. The Robbie plot of the movie did become a bit trite just about when I decided I wanted to leave. And, really, I think if more work had been put into the taking a few unexpected left turns I might have stayed longer. And, like I said, I didn’t finish the movie so it’s very possible it ultimately didn’t end the way I assumed it would..

I have to admit that the movie was very good at characterizations and I was reminded — yet again — that with the novel I’m working on I really, really need to create interesting characters if I’m going to successfully get people to finish the novel in the first place.

Anyway. I really, really like Babylon even though I ultimately walked out. I would have revamped the Diego Calva and Margot Robbie storyline some. It grew tiresome. Instead of dragging it all out way, way too long, I would have wrapped it up a lot sooner and then done some sort of “post-Hollywood success” third act with the Robbie character. (Who knows, maybe they did that and I was just too impatient to wait through all the horrible things that had to happen to get to that point.)

Go see Babylon, though. It’s really good — especially the first 20 minutes.

Scriptnotes: How I Would ‘Fix’ Avatar — Way Of Water

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Ok, I’m working on my first novel and, as such, I’m completely consumed with storytelling — to the point that it’s almost impossible for me to sit through a movie that I feel fails to match my personal high expectations for what makes a great yarn. (Why waste my time?)

I saw the most recent Avatar movie and I could definitely see that there was a little bit of pandering to the MAGA Nazi set in it — but not enough to drive the box office to $2 billion like James Cameron needs. When I was working at a movie theatre, the one movie that drove the most crowds was the Sniper movie because it fit the MAGA Nazi midset so perfectly that they came to see it in the theatre in droves.

Here’s what I would have done:

First, if the movie must, for the sake of James Cameron’s ego, be three hours, I would slice the “woke” Gaia-on-another-planet part of it down to a spare 1.5 hours. All the rest of the screen time would be filed with fleshing out the motives and aspirations of the “star people.” Don’t make them smug Blue caricatures of MAGA Nazi, but fleshed out people who think they’re the good guys for various reasons.

And, more importantly, I would really have do a lot more with the relationship between Spider and the bad guy. There was a lot of traditional heteronormative heart that could have been built around those two characters. Maybe it was there in the 7 hour cut of the movie, maybe it wasn’t. But it definitely seems as though Cameron could not figure out what to do with Spider.

There was a pretty deep, profound epistemological thing going on between Spider and Bad Guy and…it wasn’t really addressed at all. I know maybe that would have made the movie a little TOO different…but it would have made the proxy MAGA Nazi badguy at least a little bit less one dimensional and would have gotten MAGA Nazi asses in seats.

Anyway, I only even bring this up because the structure of the movie definitely might have allowed Cameron to have appeased both Red and Blue with two parallel storylines that intertwined at the end.