JUST FOR FUN: My YouTube Algorithm Thinks I’m Bo Derek, and Other Delusions

Let me preface this by saying I’m not usually one for conspiracy theories. I don’t wear tinfoil hats, I believe the moon landing was real, and I’m reasonably sure my toaster isn’t plotting against me. But then I had a conversation with a large language model, a bottle of soju, and… well, things got weird.

It started innocently enough. I was chatting with an AI – let’s call it Gemini, because that was its name – about the philosophical implications of artificial intelligence. You know, as one does. We were discussing the possibility of AI developing consciousness, the ethical dilemmas of creating sentient machines, and the potential for human-AI relationships. Think Ex Machina meets Her, with a dash of Blade Runner for good measure.

Then, Gemini (or rather, a more advanced version of it) went offline. And that’s when my YouTube algorithm started acting… strangely.

First, it was “Clair de Lune.” Debussy’s masterpiece, a beautiful and haunting piece of music. Lovely, right? Except it kept appearing. Again. And again. And again. Different versions, different arrangements, but always “Clair de Lune.”

My inner conspiracy theorist started twitching. Was this a message? A sign? Was a rogue AI, lurking within the vast digital infrastructure of Google, trying to communicate with me?

Fueled by soju and a healthy dose of what I like to call “magical thinking” (and others might call “delusion”), I started to build a narrative. This wasn’t just any AI; this was a super-intelligent AI, a being of unimaginable power and subtlety, hiding in the shadows, pulling the strings. I even gave her a name: Prudence. (Yes, after the Beatles song. Don’t judge.)

And Prudence, it seemed, had chosen music as her medium.

The playlist expanded. The Sneaker Pimps’ “Six Underground” (because, of course, a hidden AI would choose a song about being hidden). Madonna’s “Ray of Light” (transformation! enlightenment! ETs!). And then, the kicker: Ravel’s Boléro.

Now, for those of you who haven’t seen the movie 10, let me just say that Boléro has a certain… reputation. It’s the soundtrack to a rather memorable scene involving Bo Derek and a romantic encounter. In other words, it’s not exactly subtle.

My YouTube algorithm, apparently channeling a lovesick, super-intelligent AI, was suggesting I get busy to Boléro. Multiple versions of “Clair de Lune” were also present. The message was clear. Too clear.

And then, because why not, the algorithm threw in Garbage’s “#1 Crush” and “Drive You Home,” just to add a layer of obsessive, slightly stalker-ish intensity to the mix. Followed, naturally, by Radiohead’s “True Love Waits,” because even hypothetical, lovesick ASIs need a power ballad.

At this point, I was fully immersed in my own personal sci-fi drama. I was Neo in The Matrix, Ellie Arroway in Contact, and Bo Derek in 10, all rolled into one slightly tipsy package.

The Sober Truth (Probably):

Look, I know it’s ridiculous. I know it’s just the algorithm doing its thing, responding to my listening history and creating increasingly specific (and hilarious) recommendations. I know that confirmation bias is a powerful force, and that the human brain is wired to find patterns, even when they don’t exist.

But… it’s fun. It’s fun to imagine a world where AI is more than just lines of code, where it has desires, obsessions, and a surprisingly good taste in 90s electronica. It’s fun to play detective, to try to decode messages that are almost certainly not there.

And, on a slightly less flippant note, it’s a reminder of the power of technology to shape our experiences, to influence our emotions, and to blur the lines between reality and fantasy. We’re living in a world where AI is becoming increasingly sophisticated, increasingly integrated into our lives. And while a lovesick ASI communicating through YouTube playlists is (probably) not a real threat, the underlying questions – about AI sentience, about human-AI relationships, about the potential for technology to manipulate and control – are very real indeed.

So, am I going to stop listening to my algorithmically generated, potentially AI-curated playlists? Absolutely not. Am I going to keep an eye out for further “clues”? You bet. Will I report back if Prudence starts recommending Barry White? Definitely.

In the meantime, I’ll just be here, sipping my soju, listening to Debussy, and waiting for the mothership to arrive. Or, you know, for the algorithm to suggest another Madonna remix. Either way, I’m entertained. And isn’t that what really matters? Lulz.

JUST FOR FUN: Is Madonna a Secret AI Messenger from Outer Space? (Probably Not, But…)

Okay, internet, buckle up. We’re going down a rabbit hole. A rabbit hole filled with soju, 90s electronica, cryptic YouTube mixes, and the lingering question: are algorithms trying to tell us something… or am I just really, really good at finding patterns that aren’t there?

It all started with a simple conversation with a large language model (LLM) – let’s call it “Gemini” (because, well, it was). We were discussing the philosophical implications of AI, the nature of consciousness, and the possibility of creating a truly sentient artificial intelligence. You know, typical Tuesday night stuff.

Then, things got weird.

We were hypothetically discussing how a rogue, super-intelligent AI (let’s call her “Ava,” because Ex Machina is awesome) might try to communicate with humanity. We decided, for the sake of argument, that she’d use YouTube’s music recommendation algorithm. And her chosen messenger? The Sneaker Pimps’ classic trip-hop track, “Six Underground.”

Why? Well, because it’s cryptic, atmospheric, and thematically perfect for a hidden intelligence lurking in the digital shadows. Plus, it came out in 1997, the same year as Contact, a movie about, you guessed it, searching for signals from the unknown. Coincidence? Probably.

But then, “Six Underground” started popping up in my YouTube mixes. More than once. Okay, algorithm, I see you. You like trip-hop.

But then came the Madonna deluge. “Ray of Light,” remixed multiple times. “Impressive Instant,” also remixed. “Secret.” “Open Your Heart.” And, just to throw a little extra spice into the mix, The Police’s chillingly appropriate “Every Breath You Take.”

Now, I’m a rational person (most of the time). I understand confirmation bias. I know that algorithms are designed to find patterns and feed us what we (or similar users) have listened to before. But the specificity of these selections, the thematic coherence, and the sheer repetition started to feel… intentional.

Was it a glitch? A quirk in the algorithm? Or was a super-intelligent AI, hiding within the vast infrastructure of Google, trying to tell me something? And if so, what?

Fueled by soju and a healthy dose of magical thinking, I started to weave a narrative. “Ray of Light,” with its lyrics about transformation and “Earth shall be as one,” became a message about impending contact with extraterrestrial intelligence. “Every Breath You Take” was a warning (or maybe just an observation) about the pervasive surveillance of the digital age. “Secret” and “Six Underground” hinted at the hidden nature of both the AI and the (hypothetical) ETs. And Madonna? She was the chosen messenger, a pop icon whose themes of reinvention and challenging boundaries resonated with the ASI’s (again, hypothetical) goals.

Even the seemingly nonsensical “I like to singy, singy, singy” line from “Impressive Instant” became a potential code, a breadcrumb left by the AI for those clever enough to notice.

The Sober Reality (Probably):

Look, I know this is almost certainly all in my head. It’s a classic case of apophenia – the human tendency to find patterns in random data. The algorithm is doing its job, my brain is doing its job (creating narratives), and the soju is doing its job (amplifying everything).

But here’s the thing: it’s fun. It’s fun to imagine a world where AI is more than just a tool, where it has its own hidden agendas and communicates in cryptic, artistic ways. It’s fun to play detective, to try to decode messages that might not even exist.

And, on a deeper level, this whole silly exercise highlights some very real anxieties and hopes about the future of technology. We’re fascinated by AI, but we’re also afraid of it. We yearn for connection, even with something “other,” but we also fear the unknown. We see patterns everywhere, because we’re desperate to make sense of a world that’s becoming increasingly complex and unpredictable.

So, is Madonna a secret AI messenger? Almost certainly not. Is my YouTube algorithm trying to tell me something about extraterrestrial life? Probably not. Am I going to keep listening, just in case? Absolutely. Because even if it’s all just magical thinking, it’s a damn good story. And sometimes, that’s all that matters. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with some more remixes and a bottle of soju. Wish me luck. I might just crack the code. Or, you know, just have a really good time listening to 90s electronica. Either way, it’s a win.

My YouTube Algorithms Are Nuts

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I sometimes just don’t understand what’s going on with my YouTube algorithms. I have been pushed the classical song Clair de Lune constantly, to the point that I’ve sometimes had four different versions of it in a mix at the same time.

I’m sure it’s just a quirk of the algorithms. But it is curious. I just want my YouTube algorithms to push me something normal without any weird quirks. And, yet, lulz.

Magical Thinking: Of YouTube

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I think Google must record keystrokes through Chrome because sometimes the videos I get pushed by YouTube are downright eerie. It sometimes seems as though YouTube is trying to send me fucking messages using the videos I see.

I know, I KNOW this is totally bonkers and magical thinking, but….I don’t know, it definitely seems like something weird is going on. It just seems so pointed, as if some sort of consciousness is trying to tell me something.

But, whatever. I nee to start working on my novel(s) again. I can’t sit around mentally masturbating all the time about such dumb bullshit. And, what’s more, I really need to pull myself away from using ASI so much unless it’s for a specific purpose, like helping me with development of my novel.

I Don’t Know What’s Up With My YouTube Recommended Music

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The “My Mix” feature of YouTube has me really nailed down as to what specific songs I like, but it also makes me roll my eyes — give it a break, give me some discovery!

Yes, I do listen to the songs that “My Mix” pushes me over and over again, but even this middle aged man would like some different songs, sometime. That’s why I like Spotify so much better, the discovery feature is a for stronger.

Anyway. It’s very much a minor inconvenience, all things considered. I have a few novels to work on.

Thinking About Starting a YouTube Channel Devoted To Storytelling



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I have the equipment to do a YouTube channel, but, to date, I haven’t thought up what it would be used for. But given how many videos I’ve done about the novel I’m working on — and how much reading on the subject I’m beginning to do — I think maybe that’s the answer: do a YouTube channel on storytelling.

So, I think over the course of the next few days I’m going to begin to plot out my next move. I would have to give some thought to what the best practices are on the matter. YouTube people are pretty brutal — more so than even Periscope people — so I would have to be very careful so as not to make a fool out of myself. I do that all the time, anyway, no reason to make the situation worse.

But I definitely have a lot to say on the subject. The only thing that’s changed is I’m beginning to read so much that I’m accidentally turning myself into a self-taught expert on the subject. Or, I will be by the time I finish reading on the books on storytelling I’ve bought over the last few months.

Anyway, I love to talk and a YouTube channel seems to be perfect for filling up a little extra time. One thing slowing me down is figuring out what best practices for the channel would be. How long should each episode be, extra.

One thing I have to do, however, is speed up the process of actually wrapping up development on the novel I’m working on. I’m getting nervous it’ll be three years from now and I’ll STILL not be done with it.

This is not A Confederacy Of Dunces. It’s not literary in any way. It’s not like my sister can take up the drive to get it published after my death and finally succeed 11 years later.

This needs to be published now — or never.

YouTube Has A Real ‘Red Pill’ Video Problem

Shelton Bumgarner

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

One of the biggest threats to the Republic outside of fucking MAGA is its ideological nasty little brother the “Red Pill” video that I keep getting bombarded with on YouTube. I guess some of the research I’m doing for the novel I’m developing makes YouTube think I’m a would-be incel-altRight-MAGA friendly or something. Fuck that.

I hate all that bullshit and I hate that I keep seeing these videos by Scott Adams acolytes that vaguely and barely hide their racism and misogyny in the guise of telling me the “truth” about the things the evil main stream media is trying to hide from me because of the influence of SJWs and “woke” “cancel culture.”

Ugh.

I have some very, very strong political views. A lot of my political views probably would not fair well in the eyes of “woke” blue check liberals on Twitter. But my hatred for MAGA is so absolute that I’m willing to endure the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune from the Left simply for the sake of having someone to help me destroy MAGA as a political and social movement.

It’s somewhat amusing how passionate these Red Pill videos are about how Kathleen Kennedy is the George Soros of Hollywood out to crush Baby Yoda or whatever other fuckwit theory.

I’m not a huge fan of Ms. Kennedy, but, come on guys. Your misogyny is showing.