Tag: expat life

‘It Was 20 Years Ago Today…’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I could probably check my email to see exactly when the ROKon Magazine saga started, but it was definitely around this time (August) in 2006. I met the late Annie Shapiro and my life totally changed.

Pictures of me even look differently — there are the before Annie Shapiro photos and there are the after Annie Shapiro photos.

Anyway, it was a long time ago and nobody cares anymore. Though, in the last few days, I have felt a mental pull towards South Korea as if someone — or a group of people — somehow connected to my time in Asia is / are thinking about me at the same time.

It’s all very curious.

I go back and forth regretting the whole drama that was ROKon Magazine. I think, however, in the end, the point is not that it kind of bashed one of my emotional knees so much as it did, for a brief moment, give me the opportunity to be “cool.”

I did everything wrong, of course. And think that’s the main reason why I grieved so much about what happened. Everything that went wrong with ROKon Magazine was *my fault*.

So, now, I just do nothing but feel bad about what happened. I’ve wasted so much of my life just doing nothing. I half-assed wanted to move to, say LA or NYC at some point but unless the Singularity happens and massive improvements in anti-aging technology happens I’m kind of screwed.

But there’s always hope.

ROKon Magazine Was Just About 20 Years Ago Now

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The event that totally changed my life, ROKon Magazine, was just about 20 years ago now. It started when I got an email from the late Annie Shapiro while I was in the Philippines.

It was a long time ago and nobody cares anymore.

I don’t even care that much, other than how much the whole thing changed my life. But, looking back, the thing that I’m still amazed about is that there is a time limit to how long one can stay in South Korea as an expat.

Some people it’s five years, other people it’s 11. But it comes for everyone eventually.

The Dog That Hasn’t Barked

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I must have taught 100s of little South Korean kids while I was there and yet, to date, I haven’t had one of them as a grown up try to contact me. I’m very indifferent about this — it’s no big deal if they don’t.

And, yet, looking back at how fucking weird I was while I was in South Korea, I’m a little worried some day soon, randomly, one of those now very adult little kids will track me down and want to have a long conversation about how I changed their lives.

I think if I was in South Korea still it would be different. But, lulz, I’m very much not and haven’t been anywhere near Asia in close to 15 years now.

It was a long time ago and nobody cares anymore, as they say.

RIP Dave Hat

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

When I “divorced” the late Annie Shapiro at the end of my version of ROKon Magazine, she got “Talking Crap.”

Talking Crap was a little group of would-be Algonquin Roundtable expats who drank a lot and did really funny, interesting things. They were way ahead of the curve in these little videos they used to make with their digital cameras.

Me with the late Dave Hat a long time ago in Seoul.

In hindsight, Talking Crap would probably have been huge during the social media age.

We lost a member of Talking Crap recently, Dave Hat.

Dave Hat was a great guy. He and I were, at least in my view, two sides of the same coin. And his unexpected death has really gotten me thinking about my own mortality. I’m not going to live forever and I really need to put up or shut up.

It Was A Long Time Ago & Nobody Cares Anymore, Redux

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

We are slowly creeping towards it being 20 years ago that the late Annie Shapiro and I started ROKon Magazine. Not a lot has happened in my life since then, sad to say. I’ve been in emotional neutral since about April, 2007.

Ugh.

But, there are signs of hope. I’m hoping to wrap up some sort of novel by spring 2026 and start to query it not later than maybe Sept 1st. I just don’t know, though. It will be interesting to see.

The premise of the novel is pretty good, if a bit dark. But I’m so moody when it comes to working on a novel I don’t know how much of that thinking it’s “dark” comes from I just sometimes don’t feel like working on anything at all for long stretches of time.

Anyway. I keep thinking about what happened to me way back when in South Korea and how I would do everything different if I had a second chance. I learned what NOT to do, that’s for sure.

Don’t fall in love with your co-founder, if you start a magazine, is one big issue. And also don’t be afraid to accept defeat and start over again in a different way.

And, yet, I think the key thing, the biggest thing, that I didn’t realize about the whole ROKon Magazine rigmarole is there is a time limit for 99% of the expats who live in South Korea. And you have no idea what your time limit is. It just strikes and you HAVE TO GO, no matter where you might be otherwise in your expat expereince.

Sigh.

I’m so much older now that if I ever return to South Korea (the way it’s going it will have to be the fallen DPRK that needs English teachers that will be how I get back) that it just won’t be as much fun. Maybe no fun at all. Sigh, sigh, sigh.

If I Was In Seoul Now, I Would Totally Start An Expat Podcast

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

So, about 20 years ago now, I started ROKon Magazine. It is the greatest story never told, in my opinion. Anyway, if I was an expat in Seoul now, I would start a podcast.

What I would do is, we would have a regular podcast — maybe once a week — and then as part of that podcast, we would have a regularly updated Website that would have content that would otherwise be in a magazine.

There would be a symbiotic relationship between the podcast and the Website.

Too bad the only way I’m ever going back to Korea it looks like at this point is if North Korea collapses and there’s a dire need for English teachers there. Otherwise, I will be 80 years old before I can return (unless I somehow finish and sell this novel I’m working on.)

I Still Really Miss South Korea, Redux

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It has been a very long time since I was in South Korea. And, in all honesty, I don’t really think about it that much. At least, until, of course, I see someone from South Korea did something like search my name on LinkedIn.

Then I start to remember all that fun (and bullshit.)

Going to South Korea really, really, really changed my life for both the better and the worse. There is definitely a before South Korea me and an after South Korea me. You can even see it in the photos of me taken before, during and after that time in my life.

Anyway.

The way it’s going, I’m going to be in my 60s or 70s — if even then — before I ever get out of the country, much less back to South Korea. I sometimes muse that if North Korea ever collapsed the country would be so desperate for English teachers that even a bad English teacher (at least for little kids) could get job there.

But I probably shouldn’t worry about such things. I have to accept that barring something REALLY unexpected, that I’m never, ever going back to South Korea. It was a long time ago and nobody cares anymore.

This Is A Surreal Situation

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Not since that brief moment in Seoul when ROKon Magazine was the only English-language magazine in the city (for the average expat) have I felt this much promise in something creative I’m involved in.

The idea that I would be actually ahead of the curve when it comes to writing a story about sort of an android Annie Hall (who at some point becomes a stripper) is rather surreal. The big question is will there be a flood of such android manic pixie dreamgirl *wink* stories in 2026 to the point that while I’m querying this novel this little sliver of opportunity I have will be all very moot before it’s over with.

I just don’t know.

The key thing is I’m writing a novel, not a screenplay (even though if I was 25 years younger that’s exactly what I would be doing.) So, as such, the dynamics are a little bit different.

If there was a movie made of this novel, I think Rachel Sennott would be perfect as my female (android) romantic lead.

It could be that there will be room enough in the zeitgeist for a flood of such movies and novels and just because my idea is one of many, doesn’t mean it can’t be sold traditionally.

But I would be lying if I didn’t admit I am feeling very anxious about hurrying up. I really need to bhali-bhali as a Korean would say — hurry, hurry. I really want to wrap this AI-assisted beta draft up ASAP so I can turn around and have beta readers review it for me and tell me how to improve it.

There remains a chance that I really will wrap this thing up in the general April-May 2026 timeframe and will be able to query it then. What I *wish* would happen is someone in Hollywood would, in good faith, contact me and want to read what I’ve written so far so maybe we could speed the process up some.

But that’s being delusional.

It’s kind of every storyteller for themselves at this point and I’m just an old(er) loudmouth crank slaving away in the middle of nowhere.

At Least In South Korea People Cared About Me

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

At lot — a LOT — of pretty dramatic and shitty stuff happened to me while I was in South Korea. Horrific stuff on an emotional basis. But as I continue to have lingering grief over all that bullshit, one thing remains — at least people cared about me back then.

Now, not so much.

I sometimes fear I that my time in Asia is kind of it. The highpoint of my life, period.

I have a lingering desire to return to South Korea one last time. Just to walk around my old haunts.

And, yet, I also know that, lulz, everything will have changed if I go back. To the point that it will be all — on an emotional basis — moot. Only a few South Koreans might remember me and that’s about it.

I still idly daydream about going back, though. And, sometimes, on occasion, I have a hunch that someone in South Korea is thinking about me really hard. And, what’s more, occasionally, someone from from South Korea pings this blog.

It doesn’t happen as often as it used to, of course.

Now, I just think about how all that craziness was a long time ago and nobody cares anymore.

It Feels Like Someone In Asia Is Thinking About Me A Lot

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Sometimes, I find myself thinking about South Korea a lot and it feels like it’s because someone there is thinking about ME a lot. I’m not one to believe in such things, but it is interesting that randomly, and seemingly for no reason, I’ll just start to thinking really intensely about my time in Asia.

It’s been so long since I was in Asia that if anyone was thinking about me a lot, it probably would be a South Korean. I was a man on fire for much of my time in South Korea and I’m sure I made some very memorable experiences for a few South Koreans here and there.

Anyway. I don’t know why I even wrote any of this. It’s just magical thinking. I really do hope to visit South Korea at least once before I drop dead.