‘Dear Jong’ — #Lyrics To A Woke Pop Rock Song

I’m just screwing around. This would have the same vibe as XTC’s “Dear God.”

Dear Jong
by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

Dear Jong
greatly appreciate your time
didn’t mean to make you think
we wanted to bomb, bomb, bomb
but don’t mind
we don’t want to turn you into slime

dear Jong
dear Jong
dear Jong

we made coins for the event
now they’re not worth shit
wish we could still meet
without missing a beat

dear Jong
we remember Otto Warmbier
and what you did to him
and what you did to him
and what you did to him

we don’t think you’re satan
but if you keep calling Pence dumb
we’re going to have you on the run
what can I say but you’re really lame
dear Jong

dear Jong
we remember Otto Warmbier
and what you did to him
and what you did to him
and what you did to him

[bridge]
when you’re not around
we’ll have you on our minds
as we bomb you to hell
’cause we think that’d be swell

so now we’ll start a war
with a mighty roar
don’t come knocking on our door
we’re going to mop you on the floor

dear Jong

‘Brooklyn Bridge’ — #Lyrics To A Pop Rock Song

With this one, I’m trying to tell the story of the time I was walking from Brooklyn to Manhattan on the Brooklyn bridge and something somewhat amusing — at least to me — happened. This would be a fun dancable pop rock song like Pulp’s Common People.

Brooklyn Bridge
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

with Brooklyn behind me
what I should appear
but something I hold so dear
a sexy minx walking towards me
with Manhattan in the distance
she got me hot and bothered I’ll admit
we locked eyes and for a bit
I thought she would smile my way
mid-way on

Brooklyn Bridge
where dreams come true
Brooklyn Bridge
don’t look down
Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge

as I got closer I was ready
ready to smell her perfume
I imagined it was high class
just like her
she might exchange a word
I hoped as I prepared for the event
two ships passing in broad day light
on

Brooklyn Bridge
where dreams come true
Brooklyn Bridge
don’t look down
Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge

[bridge]
don’t get too excite
things can change
turn pretty lame
quicker than a heartbeat
you just want to flee
on

Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge

before we could meet
she turned away from me
with a shock
she soon clocked out
finding a way
to avoid our date with fate
she looked at me sly
but all I could do was laugh
at her misguided sass
on

Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge
Brooklyn Bridge

‘Woke Bill Kristol’ — #Lyrics To A Punk Song

These are just a silly lyrics I’ve written so I don’t do anything else that might be considered productive.

Woke Bill Kristol
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

woke Bill Kristol
he’s here to break it down
woke Bill Kristol
hasn’t sold his soul to Trump
he’s ready to rock
breaking it down for the masses
don’t get confused he on a short fuse
woke Bill Kristol
he’s able to defend his views
from all you fools

may have been an neo-con when it was cool
now he’s woke as can be
talks about MeToo on TV
making my eyes bug out with his positive views
what has happened to the rules

woke Bill Kristol
woke Bill Kristol
woke Bill Kristol

[bridge]
don’t sleep on the truth
get woke real quick
woke Bill Kristol is waiting
for you, you fool

we’re all in trouble
that no one can deny
Trump’s in town
wreaking havoc in the land
when will it all end
I don’t know
but keep an eye on woke Bill Kristol
he’s putting on a show

‘Spygate’ — #Lyrics To A Woke R&B Pop Song

This would be in the same vibe as Drake or The Weeknd. Chuck D used to say music was the CNN of the African American community and as such this song would be a way to slip in some politics into a song that had a smooth beat.

Spygate
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

it’s criminal what you’ve been doing
I see you walking around the neighborhood
rushing around with your new friends
what does it mean
why do you just want to flee
you used to be the one for me
now it’s crime against man
it’s a

Spygate (x6)

we’re all in this together
why can’t we fly up into the heavens
like we used to do
when we were in love
I have to spy on you here and there
bigger than Watergate
you’re doing it on the fly
leaving me just to sigh

Spygate (x6)

[bridge]
nothing has changed
in my heart
you make me want to dart
where to start

I don’t know what it all means
will we ever be as one
late at night wearing only love
or am I doomed to be
all alone

‘Criminal Deep State’ — #Lyrics To Woke R&B Song

Guys, the president is insane. But he does have a way with a turn of phrase. So, in honor of this on-going political horror movie we’re all forced to watch, here are my ham-handed effort at trying to tell a story in verse. The beat to this would like something you might find with The Weeknd. At least, that’s my vision for this.

Criminal Deep State
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

you leave me with my head in my hands
sitting on the side of my bed
wondering about this deep state I’m in
was it all a dream
all that living in sin
it’s criminal what you did to me
fucking with my head again and again

it’s a criminal deep state
out to get me
it’s a criminal deep state
spies all around
spies all around
spies all around

when you told me you loved me
did you have to rub the pain in
with salt from your tears
the state of mind you’ve left me in
fills me with dread
I know I could have done better
but once you left me light as a feather

it’s a criminal deep state
out to get me
it’s a criminal deep state
spies all around
spies all around
spies all around

[bridge]
but you’re gone now
at least I think
sometimes I think I see you
but it’s just the criminal deep state
you left me in

I hope it’s all a dream
the birds I hear tweeting to me
I don’t know when it will end
this nightmare you’ve left me in
but all I know it’s criminal
the state you’ve left me in

it’s a criminal deep state
out to get me
it’s a criminal deep state
spies all around
spies all around
spies all around

‘Not My Type’ — #Lyrics To A Pop-Country Song

There’s a purity to writing song lyrics simply for the joy of telling a story in verse. At least, that’s the mindset behind me writing lyrics today. I should be working on my novel, but I can’t quite bring myself to get into the frame of mind yet. So, I’m relaxing by writing song lyrics. These lyrics would go to a slow country music song where the lyrics are clearly understandable. This is written from a woman’s point of view about the effects of a bad break up.

Not My Type
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

see a smile from a mile away
but it’s not going to sway
I’ve been here before
but I don’t mean to bore
struggling to figure it all out
what it means without a doubt

you seem kind
maybe even divine
we could settle down
start a little family
but I can tell right away
much to my dismay

you’re not my type
you’re not my type
you’re not my type
and that ain’t right

you’ve got hair
place on your head by God on a dare
a stare that leaves me weak
when are we going to meet
I ask myself every time I see on the street
my imagination runs while
but after a while
I understand how it’s going to end
with me saying under my breath

you’re not my type
you’re not my type
you’re not my type
and that ain’t right

[bridge]
when I think back
at the hurt
I wonder how it’ll all end
will I get over him
or will I just wallow in my sin

one more time
one more time for the road
I’ll wait by my house
knowing you’ll never arrive
you’re just a memory
too good for me

‘Incel’ — #Lyrics To A Rock Song

I find the whole notion of the “incel” to be completely ridiculous. It’s just dumb and an excuse that misogynistic assholes wrap themselves up in to avoid their own responsibilities. Anyway, I’m in a lyric writing mood, so here you go. These lyrics would go to a hard rock beat like something you might find with Limp Bizkit. Absolutely no one cares about anything I write lyric wise, so this is just me relaxing before I settle in to work on my novel.

Incel
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

can’t get laid
so who’s to blame
yo, not me
how could that be
I’m the master of my fate
while I sit here and masturbate
look around all I see is hotties
none of them are for me
that’s why they call me

incel (x6)

girls walk on by
and lie
tell me I’m not their kind of guy
when I know the truth
who wouldn’t want to knock boots
with someone as fly as me
I’m everyone’s kind of guy
I sigh while I stroke my AR-15
I’ll show you all one day
you’ll look back and say

incel (x6)

[bridge]
girls come and go
but don’t you know
I know one day I’ll get my way
if I don’t
there will be a price to pay

when they think of me
they’ll know I’m great
doesn’t matter that it’s all in my mind
I know the plan
just wait and see
one day you’re all going to be

incel (x6)

‘D.C. Shuffle’ — #Lyrics To A Woke R&B Song

I love me some Prince and I have the whole bonkers Shera Bechard — Elliot Broidy — Donald Trump issue on the brain, so these lyrics are me trying to tell that potential story in verse. I don’t really have any beat to go with these lyrics, but it would be a fast Prince song like in my imagination.

D.C. Shuffle
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

she fell in love with a powerful man
who told her he had the fate of the world
the fate of the world in his hands
they met in L.A. as you do
they were dancing with the bunnies
who had sin in their hearts and in their eyes
before the night was over he was between her thighs
they were doing the

D.C. shuffle
the D.C. shuffle
you know it by heart
once you get a taste of power
the D.C. shuffle is your thing
the D.C. shuffle will make you sing

she told soon enough she was in trouble tough
needed his help ’cause she her finances were rough
he told her not to worry as long as she kept her mouth shut
brought in a buddy who was willing to take the fall
before you know it they were dancing
dancing the the beat of the K Street beat
they were doing, doing the

D.C. shuffle
the D.C. shuffle
you know it by heart
once you get a taste of power
the D.C. shuffle is your thing
the D.C. shuffle will make you sing

[bridge]
now don’t get confuse
she’s doing just fine
got $1.6 million smiles
will the truth come out?
who knows

so the next time you see her
the next time she passes you by
know she’s doing great
’cause of her touch with fate
she got all she wanted and more
doing the

D.C. shuffle
the D.C. shuffle
you know it by heart
once you get a taste of power
the D.C. shuffle is your thing
the D.C. shuffle will make you sing

‘Blame Game’ — #Lyrics To A Woke Pop-Rock Rap Song

I’m just screwing around. No one cares about any of these lyrics I’m writing, but it’s relaxing. This would be a uptempo rap song that would be pop enough that it might get radio airplay. I’m thinking this would be something a modern day equivalent of Public Enemy might sing. But, like I said, this is just me screwing around.

Blame Game
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

our children are dying high school halls
the powers that be
want me to believe thoughts and prayers
will solve the issue
when I demand more from them
they play the blame game

they blame
abortion
doors
Ritalin
the media
and a
culture of violence
but when they play this game
they won’t blame
guns
guns
guns
guns

when will thing change I wanna know
I don’t mean to be crass but
when will they stop blowing smoke my up my ass
we’re all going to have to stop the debate
start thinking of ways to fix the blame game
we need to act in some way
because this blame game is getting pretty lame

they blame
abortion
doors
Ritalin
the media
and a
culture of violence
but when they play this game
they won’t blame
guns
guns
guns
guns

[bridge]
just give me facts
let’s fix this issue
with action that works
stop sending me your thoughts and prayers
I have no fear

we’re going to take great care
to demand the change that is clear
but it won’t be easy to come by
when the NRA is in our way day and night
let’s stop giving thoughts and prayers
we need the strength to make things right
stop playing the blame game
stop playing the blame game
stop playing the blame game

’13 Angry And Conflicted Democrats’ — #Lyrics To Woke Pop Country Song

It used to be, there was a significant subset of country music which can only be described as “hippie redneck.” They talked about gun control and smoking pot a lot. That, alas, is long gone. But these lyrics would harken back to those days. At least, that’s my goal.

13 Angry And Conflicted Democrats
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls
please give credit if you produce or perform

our president’s lost his mind
it seems kind of sad I have to admit
time doesn’t seem to be on his side
one of these days thing will come around
he keeps ranting about Mueller
when he should just stay quiet

13 angry and conflicted Democrats
they may be our only savior I’m afraid
13 angry and conflicted Democrats
Mr. Mueller knows what he’s doing
13 angry and conflicted Democrats
they’re just doing their job like me and you

the president thinks everyone is out to get him
it’s sad, I know
but if he hasn’t done anything wrong
why does he act so guilty that’s a fact I want
but he just tweets up a storm
yelling into the sky hoping something will change

13 angry and conflicted Democrats
they may be our only savior I’m afraid
13 angry and conflicted Democrats
Mr. Mueller knows what he’s doing
13 angry and conflicted Democrats
they’re just doing their job like me and you

[bridge]
when will this all end
I say over yet another drink
when will Trump leave the Oval Office
that’s what I want to know

we’re stuck with Trump
at least for a little bit longer
it’s sad to say
when will he go, go, go
that’s all I ask
wish he was already gone
don’t you?