Tag: am querying

Querying My First Novel Will Be Brutal

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Tomorrow, the day after my birthday, is kind of my January 1st. I have vowed to myself that this will mark a new era in my life where not only do I lay of drinking so much, but I also really buckle down with the novel.

I’m watching House of Cards a decade after everyone else.

I have something of an idyllic situation on my hands when it comes to developing and writing a novel and it could change literally at any moment. Then I’m going to look back at this moment in my life and be smarting that I didn’t take more advantage of it when I had the opportunity.

And, yet, having said all that, I know, just know, that once I transition from the delusional la-la land of developing and writing a novel into the cold, hard reality of querying that I have to prepare myself for A LOT of disappointment. I’m already preparing myself to piviot to a few scifi concepts while I query.

The biggest problem I can sense about this novel is it’s just not dark enough. Not enough fucked up, twisted things happen. But, having said that, I have come up with more than one reason for people to keep reading during the really long first act — there’s intrigue and lots of sex — some of it kinky, if consensual.

My heroine has a sleeve tattoo similar to this one on Megan Fox, even though I thought of the idea before I saw this.

I like the idea of talking about kinkier sex in a mater-of-fact, consensual way, even though it’s easy for it to be all rather funny. But, I can’t help myself. That’s just my nature — to be kind of droll instead of dark, twisted and scary.

The Final Countdown (For The First Act Of The Third Draft)

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

As far as the first act of the novel goes, I’m just about to the point where there — hopefully – won’t be too much change on a structural basis. As such, that will really aid in editing and writing the rest of it out.

My novel is meant to be a homage to Stieg Larsson’s Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.

Once I reach the second act, then things will slow down again because even though I know, in general terms, what the story is, I’m far from locking things down. But the general “Fun & Games” part of story — the first half of the second act — is, in general terms pretty stabilized.

One structural problem I have is the first half of the novel may be significantly longer than the second half. I don’t quite know what to do about that. And I’ve had at least one Reader suggest that my chapters are too long. While I understand where the person is coming from, they were the only person to complain about the length of the first chapter and Stieg Larsson’s chapters were about the same length — if not longer — than what I showed them.

And, really, shit to do with chapters is something that can be figured out in post-sale, post-production.

I just need to get the story done. And the word count is something I really worry about at the moment. I hope that I can come in at no more than 140,000 words — the length of The Girl on The Train — but I fear it will be closer to 160,000 words, which would be about the length of a Larsson novel.

My heroine looks like Nathalie Emmanuel as I write her.

But, in general, I’m very pleased with what I’ve come up with. One concern is how much sexxy time there is in the first act, so I’ve decided to embrace the issue by suggesting my heroine is a sex addict. So, rather than, being coy about that particular element of the story, I hope readers will simply accept — “Oh, ok, I should accept a lot of sex in this novel.”

The whole second half of this novel is in a great deal of flux. Especially in regards to the third act — I have only the vaguest idea of what is going to happen.

But, in general, things are moving a lot faster than they have been. I have to admit that I’m kind of embarrassed by how fucking long it’s taken me to get to this point. But, I’ve been doing all of this in a vacuum and that slowed me down a great deal.

I Suspect Hollywood Will Love The ‘Part-Time Sex Worker’ Element of This Novel

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Whenever I get a little nervous about having my heroine be a part-time sex worker — stripper — I remind myself how freaky most Hollywood actresses are. And, what’s more, I don’t even really have anything all that bad happen to my heroine compared to, say, what Stieg Larsson puts Lisbeth Salander through….Jesus Christ.

So, I think that while a certain portion of the reading public will be turned off by this particular element of my heroine’s character, the people who might actually one day adapt it into a movie — if it ever became that popular, natch — will really dig it.

Having her occasionally strip to relax adds a lot of complexity to her character and evokes an emotional reaction of some sort, which is what all good storytelling does. I am well aware of how some people will want to throw the book across the room the moment they realize that it’s a smelly CIS white male writing from a female POV instead of an undocumented trans woman, but, lulz, slings and arrows and all that.

It will be interesting to see what happens, regardless.

General Videos From Me

Once I Stabilize The First Three Chapters Of The Third Draft Of This Novel, Things Should Move Really Fast

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I am so close to stabilizing the first three chapters of this novel to the point that things might start to go really fast. One huge problem I face is I’ve so forked the story from what it was intended to be in the second draft that I have a huge amount of writing, rather than editing, ahead of me.

My dream is to write a novel as popular as Stieg Larsson’s The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.

I’m going to have to just throw everything up in the air and reimagine a lot of the novel on a specific basis, with the third act really being something I have to work on. The third act of the second draft s u c k e d. It was horrible. So these days I spend a lot of of my time thinking in the back of my mind about how I can straighten out some serious problems in the third act.

Anyway. My storytelling and writing ability have both gotten significantly better. Some of it is I’ve being using AI some to help develop the novel — but not write it — because I’m doing everything in a vacuum and I have nothing to go on but my gut.

And sometimes my gut just doesn’t cut it.

But, in general, I’m very pleased with what I’ve managed to come up with. One key thing I have to do is stop being such an absolute perfectionist. The point is to finish a third draft THEN go back and edit it some. This business of forking the Goddamn thing all the time has got to stop.

Uh Oh

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

So, I was in Richmond yesterday, finding random people to hand out a draft of the first three chapters of the novel to when something happened that stopped me cold. I told a young woman who was obviously a liberal white woman the more “edgy” elements of the novel — that my heroine owned a strip club — and she immediately shut down.

This does not bode well for how the liberal white women that I imagine make up the majority of literary agents will respond to that same “edgy” part of the story. I was talking to the young woman in question, having a friendly conversation about the novel, but the moment I told her about the strip club part of the story — she shut down and wandered off.

My reaction to this is multifold.

On one hand, it definitely is a tap on the shoulder to have a back up plan of some sort. I really need to work on a back up novel. I have three solid scifi concepts I can work on.

The heroine of my novel, in my imagination, looks a lot like Corrie Yee.

My other reaction is, fuck it, we’ll do it live. If “Barry” can be produced to success, then my weird little story can potentially be a success, too. I just have to buckle down and get this thing done.

I continue to be concerned about word count, however. I really need to be prepared for the novel to be in the 140,000 – 160,000 range which is just way too fucking long. That gives me another reason to pause and work on a backup plan

An Issue Of Verisimilitude

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

If I ever needed a clear sign that, in general, no one takes me seriously, it’s my overall failure to get anyone from my past life with the press industry to answer my call for help about something. (I finally got one person, but that’s really not very many given how many people I reached out to.)

The issue is, I really want to make the situation I’ve come up with for my heroine — that she owns both a strip club (where she occasionally strips to relax) and an alternative weekly — as real as possible. Like, how would that REALLY work out, especially in mid-1990s Richmond, VA?

I’m WELL AWARE that because of human nature and the needs of marketing, that there is a real risk that this novel would be reduced down to two tropes being fused together — “hooker (or sex worker) with a heart of gold” and “sexy slutty assassin” solves a murder mystery.

I think about this even more given how many men my heroine beds in the first act for the purposes of the plot. All the sexxy time is not gratuitous and definitely serves the overall plot. And, in general, I don’t even really show the spicy stuff that much. I do show it some, but it’s hopefully not so much that people get turned off.

And, what’s more, I’ve cut back the sex in the second act. I don’t know, but I think that best practices for storytelling is you delay sexxy time as much as possible. But, lulz, I never do anything the right way.

But the story is getting much, much better in general. I’m really pleased. But I have to prepare for people to attack me for how much sexxy time there is in the novel. While I’m very sex-positive and don’t see my heroine’s sexual activity as “slutty” I’m afraid there will be some people who think I’m replicating Debby Does Dallas with how my heroine seems to have so much sex on the fly.

Ugh. Anyway. Wish me luck.

Still Dreading Querying My Novel & ‘Comping’ It

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m something of a long-term, strategic thinker so even though I’ve not finished my first novel, I find myself dwelling how hard it will be to query it. My biggest concern is of course, that any literary agent who does “due diligence” on me is going to be aghast at how often I’ve gotten drunk and ranted about things that don’t quite jib with the mainstream media narrative.

My dream is to write a novel a popular as Stieg Larsson’s “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.”

Another big concern of mine is how I’m going to “comp” this novel, given that I don’t actually read that much fiction! I just keep re-reading Stieg Larsson’s The Girl Who Played With Fire and when you comp a novel in your query letter, you’re SUPPOSED to comp — or compare — it to something a little bit more modern.

Ugh.

As such, I’ve forced myself to buy some novels that AI have told me are similar to Larsson’s work. I suppose I could read some of the more modern faux Larsson novels, but they’re so fucking bad. Though there is the most recent new one that has, in its own way, some of the same elements of my novel, so I might buy THAT one and use it as a comp to my novel.

I hope I’m not too bonkers to be a successful novelist.

Maybe.

Anyway, I’m feeling pretty good about where things stand. Now, I just hope the country I love so much doesn’t collapse into chaos because of “vibes.”

I Think About Women Readers A Lot As I Write This Novel

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I do not purport to have any special insight into the female mind, but I do, at least, try to cater to that segment of the reading audience as I write this novel. I do this especially given the edgy, loaded nature of the novel.

I hope to write a novel that is as accessible as The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.

It’s not every day that your heroine is a part-time stripper.

Now, of course, if I was, say a transgender women writing this type of novel, then I probably be hailed as the second coming of Jesus Christ. But, alas, I’m just a smelly CIS white male — a middle aged one at that! — and, as such, slings and arrows and all that.

I have a vision for this novel and, as such, I’m prepared to take shit for what, of course, will be reduced down to “stripper solves a murder mystery.”

Ugh!

That’s not what’s going on! But no one is going to listen to me. Anything to do with sex and women — especially something out of the ordinary — is the thing that people will focus on. And that doesn’t even begin to address the issue of how Hollywood would market any adaptation of the novel should that miraculous thing somehow happen.

Anyway.

I’m really self conscious about how women readers might react to this novel to a fault. I have a few women “advisers” that help me when I feel a little bit nervous about this or that thing that I might broach in the novel while writing from a female POV.

But, like I said, I can only do so much. I’m a smelly CIS white middle aged male and a vocal minority of the reading audience will dismiss the novel the moment they see what I look like.

I Keep Fucking Forking This Novel As I Write The Third Draft

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Things are getting really, really good with this novel. I’m very pleased. But as I make my way yet again through the third draft’s first act, I keep subtly changing it so it forks.

This sucks.

But I’ve come up with a very interesting new take on the general story that I’ve been working on for years now. The thing about writing a novel is you sometimes find yourself asking yourself some pretty surreal questions. Like, for instance, if this or that sexual act is more “kinky.”

I have everything sorted out on that front — at least to my satisfaction — but I still have a little bit of concern that being so matter-of-fact about things is going to make people giggle.

This is an example of how different I am as a writer than Stieg Larsson. He was too often very dark and twisted whereas I have a far more sex-positive take on some of weird, freaky shit he broached.

That, by definition, makes for a very different type of story.

My biggest fear is, of course, that the novel just won’t be dark enough for its intended genre of mystery-thriller. But, I do keep forking it, so, who knows, by the time this third draft is in Beta, it might be a lot more dark.