What If Pence Testifies To The January 6th Committee?

by Shelt Garner

There are rumors that Mike Pence is seriously considering talking to the January 6th Committee. Before we all get too Mueller, She Wrote level of excited about this, we need to put some context to what we might be able to expect from such a historic event.

The thing that Pence SHOULD do, which is the John Dean of the MAGA movement, is just not going to happen. I say he should do this because the only way that man is ever going to be POTUS is as part of a Unity Ticket of some sort. He doesn’t have to become Democrat, he just has to become a MAGA apostate to the point that he inflicts serious political damage to the movement.

Or, put another way, Pence would have to “change the question” when it came to what he was supposed to do. Instead of the question in his mind being, “How do I become president?” the question needs to be, “How do I change the political equation I face so dramatically that being president is even a possibility?”

Because, as it stands — Pence is never going to be a MAGA Republican President. I seem to recall MAGA wanted to hang him, at some point in the immediate past. So, if Pence really wants to be POTUS at this point, he has to burn everything to the ground. He has to flip the circuit breaker do a hard reboot of the American political system.

In the carnage that results from him destroying the Republican Party, he could very well end up on top. Liberals would be so grateful for what Pence had done that they would vote for him at least for one presidential cycle, even if they hate everything else about his politics. This is not hard. The easiest endgame for Pence is also the most painful — but it would work.

At the moment, I just don’t think Pence has it in him. He would pray about it a lot and God would tell him to give the January 6th Committee just enough information that he could still feel as though he might have a chance to be a MAGA POTUS.

Because, just from my casual conversations with my Traditionalist relatives, they hate Democrats and liberal-progressive with such a white hot rage that they can’t even imagine a situation where someone like Pence would do country over party and for the specific purpose of saving the Republic, align himself with people he didn’t agree with politically. They’re so busy thinking of the center-Left as Satanic groomers that they’re completely blinded to even considering the idea of saving America’s democratic birthright.

So, at the moment, I have very low expectations for Pence should he testify.

Pray, Mike Pence

by Shelt Garner

I read the huge Truman biography some time ago, and there’s passage where he recounts how at some point around the Korea War how Truman met Gen. MacArthur in the middle of the Pacific. Apparently, after Truman fired the general for wanting to nuke China, he mused that had they died around the time of that meeting each of their legacies would have been far, far different.

Another relevant anecdote is the very well known one about how Steve Jobs seduced John Sculley to leave Pepsi to join Apple. He said something along the lines of, “Do you want to continue to sell sugar water the rest of your life or do you want to change the world?”

So, with that in mind, let me ask Mike Pence a question, “Do you want to be joke or do you want to be a Great Man?” You can change your legacy from the guy with the fly on your head who almost got hanged by your own supporters to the Great American who saved 250 years of American democracy not once, but twice.

Pence is very conspicuous about being a man of God. I was raised in the church and I’m well aware of how important prayer is to people like him. As such, I would suggest to Pence that he take a long, long walk with the Good Lort to get some advice as to his next move.

Here’s where things stand with Pence at the moment. After doing the barest minimum necessary to keep American democracy alive, Pence is well on his way to being fading into political oblivion. Pence, as it stands, will be a joke to the center-Left and a traitor to the MAGA New Right.

And this is where the power of prayer comes in.

I totally disagree with 99% of what he believes politically — but I agree with his faith in American democracy. So much so, that it is very, very obvious that if Pence continues to have any hope of being POTUS one day, he has to change the question.

The question is no longer, “How do I win the Republican nomination?” but, rather, “Am I willing to risk switching parties to be part of a 2024 unity ticket?” The cold hard fact is — Mike Pence is never going to be POTUS if he remains a Republican. By saving American democracy, he has destroyed his political career as a Republican. To be a Republican now, by definition, means to be an autocratic fascist.

So, Pence has a very, very stark choice — drift into political oblivion and or have a greater-than-zero-sum chance at having a bust of him placed in the Capitol Rotunda at some point in the not-so-distant future.

All Pence has to do is do a lot of praying and testify on live TV, under oath before the January 6th Committee and explain what he saw from Election Day 2020 to Certification Day 2021. It might help if he told the public, on a personal level, what it felt like to have his own supporters scream “Hang Mike Pence.”

He would instantly become the Democratic front runner for 2024. The public’s perception of him would change instantly. And, what’s more, he would not have to change a single policy belief. All he would have to do is define himself as defender of American Democracy and be willing to run as part of a Unity Ticket with, maybe AOC as his veep.

Throw in some sort of pre-election power sharing agreement and the rest takes care of himself. Both sides of a very, very politically divided America would be EXTREMLY ANGRY at this arrangement, but for the 100,000 or so people across five swing states who decide American elections, such an arrangement would be catnip.

Independent swing voters — who really decide elections at this point — would love the idea that “both sides” were being represented under such an agremeemt.

Now, there are obvious risks.

One is, that this would be simply not be something that the American political system could process and Pence WOULDN’T be seen as the Democratic front runner as part of some sort of Unity Ticket. Biden is old, but he’s not dead. And he remains very popular within Democratic ranks.

But in 2024, America faces the existential choice of a MAGA Republican themed autocracy or a civil war. And, while Liz Cheney could also serve the purpose of Pence on a Unity Ticket, Pence is the big kahuna. He really could do something amazing and instantly change his legacy — simply by telling the truth.

I do not honestly believe any of this is going to happen. I mean, lulz. But it’s just so frustrating that a solution to the existential problem that faces America is right in front of Mike Pence and yet, even with a walk with the good Lort, he won’t do it.

The Case For Mike Pence To Testify Before The January 6th Committee

by Shelt Garner

If Liz Cheney is any indication, Mike Pence could dramatically change his political fortunes if he dropped a H-Bomb on Washington and agreed to testify before the January 6th Committee at some point before its televised hearings wrapped up.

Just do it, Mike.

As I’ve said before, in one simple act, Mike Pence would go from political has been to the potential Democratic 2024 front runner. It would be a jaw dropping, astonishing event in modern American political history. It could also single handedly save American democracy — or at least give a little bit more breathing room.

But why? Why should he do it?

The chief reason is the Trump anti-democratic infection has gone septic — the very thing that destroyed Pence’s MAGA career is now the only thing that could save his political career. He just has to pull a John Dean and testify live and under oath as to what he saw in the lead up to January 6th.

That one simple act would make the Liberal Elites swoon. He would be a Great Man on historical terms because he could be the one person who could manage to save democracy in 2024 because he would be EXTREMELY CONSERVATIVE and yet a Democrat. (He would have to, of course, pick someone like AOC as his veep and agree to some sort of extensive power sharing agreement, but, still.)

Of course, there is a huge amount of risk involved. It could be that what I propose wouldn’t be enough to redeem Pence in the eyes of the very woke Democratic Party base. That’s a very real possibility.

But two things. One, I hate all of Liz Cheney’s political beliefs, but damn if I wouldn’t vote for her for POTUS given the chance. I’m so desperate for principled leadership from someone who believes in democracy that I’m willing to hold my nose if it means defeating MAGA in 2024. The same applies to Mike Pence — if he testified for a few hours (days?) before the January 6th Committee and explained exactly what he knew of the conspiracy, then, yes, I would probably vote for him if he was the head of a Unity Ticket with AOC as veep.

The other issue is the historical significance of Pence doing such a thing. If he marketed himself as a defender of small-d democracy — if that was the cornerstone of why he was running for POTUS In the first place — we’re talking Great Man territory for Pence.

And, I think Pence needs to reflect on the fact that the faction of MAGA that wanted to hang him on January 6th is now the dominate faction. Within MAGA ranks, he’s growing more and more irrelevant. And the only way for him to avoid simply fading into political oblivion is to do a Hail Mary Pass and to go full John Dean on Trump and MAGA.

But no one listens to me. Oh well. I guess we need to go back to thinking about what we’re going to do in 2024 – 2025 when we either have a civil war or turn into an autocracy.

Mike Pence Is Too Delusional To Realize That His Position In The Republican Party Grows Untenable

by Shelt Garner

Mike Pence finds himself in a unique historical position. He can remain a Trump toady and fade into political oblivion and become a political footnote in the context of the rise of A Very American Autocracy — or he can become MAGA’s John Dean and change history.

It’s up to you, Mike.

This is an example of how the fate of a nation can hinge on the quirks and personal foibles of one — one! — person. The Great River of History is rushing the United States towards either great change (autocracy) or destruction (civil war) and Mike Pence on a personal basis has the means, motive and opportunity to change that flow.

Mike Pence is playing the part of Dr. Manhattan by simply doing nothing even though he could potentially buy American democracy time if he just became a MAGA Republican apostate. Maybe, with extra time we could figure out some way to solve the existential problems that face the nation so we don’t start murdering each other in cold blood for political reasons.

It’s all very, very frustrating. Pence has the means, motive and opportunity to be a Great Man….and he is too much of a toady. Even after his boss said he was cool with him being hanged! If that isn’t an indication that this is The Before Times of American politics, then I don’t know what is.

When people are more devoted to a demonstrably deranged idiot because he’s an avatar for the rage of white American rather than do what is right for American democracy, then, lulz, what the fuck?

Get Woke, Mike Pence

by Shelt Garner

In the book, “How Democracies Die,” they propose a solution to prevent a democracy from dying outright — the other, non-autocratic parties have to bond together for the sake of the nation.

Now, this solution is extremely problematic for America. The country is too big, unfocused and divided for any sort of “unite for the sake of the nation” plan to work.

And, yet, there is one person who could make such a plan a lot closer to being real — Mike Pence.

All he has to do is one fucking thing and he is SOOOO CLOSE to be the Democratic Union (or whatever) Party nominee in 2024: become a MAGA apostate (a John Dean-type character). He doesn’t have to change any other policy view other than turning on Trump and MAGA.

Pence would never do this, of course, because he’s a fucking coward, but if he did, he would suddenly be throw into the rarified ranks of Great American Men because, he could, single handedly give American democracy some breathing room if he teamed up with, say, AOC.

But he’s never going to do it. He somehow thinks he can play it safe and may a charge at MAGA King Trump and somehow succeed (fun fact: no.) So, Pence really faces sinking into political oblivion with both sides hating him equally for different reasons.

Or, he could get woke get pretty damn close to becoming the next POTUS. Of course, if he did run with AOC, there would have to be some sort of power sharing agreement. The whole thing would make America’s government seem rather schizophrenic, but at least it would probably avoid a civil war and probably keep the country a functioning democracy for one or more additional election cycles.

Mike Pence Is Such A Coward

by Shelt Garner

The brass ring is right there for Mike Pence and he’s such a fucking coward that he won’t grab it. All he has to do is become a #NeverTrumper and he instantly becomes a darling of the center-Left to the point that there will be talk of him heading some sort of “Unity Ticket” in 2024.

Or not. Don’t listen to me. I’m just some doofus in the rural part of a flyover state.

But the case could be made that if Pence did some domestic realpolitik assessments in his mind that it would be clear that the only way he will ever and I mean EVER become politically relevant again is to become a #Never Trumper. And as Liz Cheney has shown, you don’t even have to change your otherwise antediluvian conservative views.

He would get a pass from the center-Left for all his other brutish conservative views simply because he turned his back on Trump and MAGA. He already has the means, motive and opportunity to do it and…yet he won’t do it. He is beginning to kind of do things on the edges, but in general he’s still towing the MAGA line.

I will note, however, that if there is some sort of Second American Civil War that Pence definitely might change his mind on being MAGA. In fact, I would go so far as to say him jumping ship to Blue State leadership would be a sign that we’re about to have a second American civil war.

Yet, of course, I still am reluctant to believe we’re going to have a civil war in the first place, even though it’s a definite possibility. Blue States just don’t have it in them to leave the Union, especially given their lack in leadership — unless, of course, someone like Mike Pence becomes over to their side.

Talk About A Vibe Shift: Imagining Pence As A #NeverTrumper

by Shelt Garner

I continue to believe that we should not sleep on the potential significance of the #NeverTrump movement. I say this because even though at the moment they’re a very, very small collection of Republicans, they are all usually really smart and articulate leaders.

And should things get as harry as I fear around 2024 – 2025 what Blue States are going to need is leaders.

As such, at the moment, the person who is most likely to be forced, by history, to rise to the occasion is Liz Cheney. It would be extremely ironic, but if Blue States got fed up and left the Union, Cheney is just the type of person who would step into the leadership void that currently exists with the center-Left. The center-Left is so divided and deluded for various reasons as to be useless.

But there is another person who could really shock us all if he would simply do the obvious and become a #NeverTrumper — Mike Pence.

Let me be clear — I absolutely fucking hate Mike Pence’s political beliefs. I despise them.

But I swear to God if that motherfucker confessed everything he knew about Trump and Trumplandia and I would be the first in line to vote for him in 2024. I’m so enraged by the impending return of fucking ding-dong Trump in 2024 that if the only way to save the Republic was to vote for motherfucking Mike Pence I would do it in a heart beat.

The thing about Pence is while he’s crazy conservative, he’s enough of a traditional American conservative that he would probably stay within the bounds of the Republic’s norms at a minimum. And he would definitely stay within the spirit of Constitutional law – he did do that, after all, when he was required to on Certification Day 2021.

If Pence was to become a #NeverTrumper it would throw the American political system for a loop. It would be most shocking political event of this new century, up there with the election of Obama the first time and the election of Trump — and the January 6th Insurrection.

Pence would completely, and totally, rewrite his political fate in an instant. He wouldn’t have to change a single political view other than his fidelity to Trump. And he would be within shouting distance of being the Democratic nominee as part of a 2024 Unity Ticket.

There would be, of course, a huge amount of risks to such a Hail Mary pass. If he got any traction, MAGA would want to kill him. But, come to think of it, they already want to do that, now don’t they. He would become the most hated person in America for about 38% of the electorate.

But since Blue Check liberals have proven that they’re all fools, they would love Pence with all their heart and he wouldn’t have to change a thing. Of course, I just don’t see Pence doing any such thing. He will never rise to the occasion and be a hero of the Republic by giving the center-Left the leadership it needs.

Oh well. I wonder if my re-education camp will have wi-fi and a shower.

Mike Pence As America’s (Potential) Great White Hope

by Shelt Garner

It’s beginning to dawn on me that Mike Pence has a rendezvous with history — if he so choses. There is no way that man is going to be POTUS if he stays safely within the MAGA family. If he leaves MAGA cold turkey and confesses everything and I mean EVERYTHING he knows about Trump and Trumplandia, then he has a pretty good chance of becoming extremely culturally and politically culturally again.

Now, obviously Pence is never, ever fucking going to do this.

But it’s beginning to eat away at me that he won’t and so I find myself needing to write about it.

One question is, of course, when would Pence turn on MAGA? My best guess would be just after the the results of the 2022 mid-terms are known and we find out if Trump is going to run again. If Trump does run again — which obviously he will — Pence might, just might decide that the only way he can possibly ever be president is as an Andrew Johnson type figure.

Andrew Johnson was a royal asshole, but for Lincoln at the time of the 1864 election, Johnson served an important purpose as a War Democrat. Or, put another way, Pence would instantly be seen as a liberal darling by easily seduced Blue Check liberals who have learned nothing from Bob Mueller and various other false hope conservative Republicans.

So, the moment Pence joined the “Resistance” in a very public manner, he would be fawned over by Blue Check liberals who would believe the he, at last, will be the one to save us all and allow them to continue to write long breathless Twitter threads instead of doing any of the hard work in the real world.

Anyway, I don’t know what to tell you. I don’t see any way out of our existential choice of autocracy or civil war around 2024 – 2025. But it’s extremely annoying that Pence won’t show any leadership at all.

Mike Pence’s Only Option Is To Become MAGA’s John Dean

by Shelt Garner

It is comical how dumb Mike Pence is from a political standpoint. He has the means, motive and opportunity to become, overnight, a liberal political hero and, yet, he’s so beholden to Trump he can’t bring himself to do what he has to do — become MAGA’s John Dean.

Let me explain.

Despite their protests to the contrary, modern Blue Check liberals like the “Mueller, She Wrote” Twitter account really do still believe in the system and really do believe that somehow, magically, Trump and his ilk will be, at last, held accountable. They write breathless Twitter threads about the latest MAGA scandal, leaving their audience with a warm fuzzy feeling of justice just on the cusp of being served.

Now, this is the point where Mueller, She Wrote calls me “a terribly negative person” who “mischaracterized” her work. Uh huh. But why is the account itself named after the delusional belief on the part of Blue Check liberals that life-long Republican Bob Mueller was going to somehow — you guessed it — save us from ourselves?

What’s more, people like Liz Cheney have proven that liberals are willing to fall all over themselves with support for you — even they otherwise disagree with you on everything else — if you just are willing to stand up to the MAGA New Right.

So, as such, the case could be made that if Pence became a MAGA apostate that he could potentially throw himself into the ring as — gulp — the Democratic nominee in 2024. Or something. Something like that. At a minimum, he would be in a far better political position that he is now.

Rather than run away from the fact that the MAGA base hates him and wants to “hang Mike Pence” he would be far better off politically to reverse polarity and embrace the #NeverTrump movement.

Why doesn’t he do such an obvious thing?

I dunno. It’s one of the biggest political mysteries of our time. The brass ring of political relevancy is right there in front of him. And, in real terms, he wouldn’t even have to change anything he believes other than stop being a Trump sycophant.

I mean, Liz Cheney is till a tough as nails conservative I don’t agree with on anything, but if she ran for president, I would seriously think about voting for her out of desperation for the fate of the Republic, if nothing else.

Pence switching sides would be not only the biggest political event of the decade, it would breath a huge amount of air into our failing Republic. All he would have to do is totally, completely disavow Trump, confess everything he knew about that malignant idiot.

He could keep all is horrible political views, otherwise. People — especially Blue Check liberals — would be overjoyed at what had happened, that they would ignore the rest of his brutish policy beliefs. The fact that the MAGA base actively wanted to murder him has not been enough to dislodge him from MAGA is, well, it’s something else.

Mike Pence’s Potential John Dean Endgame (Which He Will Never Do)

by Shelt Garner

It is a testament to how fucked things are in America right now that the thing that should happen, Mike Pence shiving Trump politically, isn’t probably going to happen.

Pence is never going to be a modern day John Dean.

Pence is the one person with the means, motive and opportunity to play John Dean in the Trump Show. If he were to politically immolate himself and turn state’s witness against Trump as some sort of Hail Mary pass to position himself to be the 2024 Republican nominee, then I would feel a whole lot better about where we are headed as a country.

But I think to think that this is in any way possible is to fall into the now-dead post-Watergate narrative where someone, somewhere breaks and does the right thing for the country out of guilt, or shame or principles or whatever. That just isn’t going to happen.

Watergate, it turns out, was a very specific set of circumstances. A lot of things went wrong for Nixon on both a political and personal level that simply are not practical. The press after Watergate became so cocky and started to believe it’s own…press…that they thought any major political scandal going forward would follow the same narrative.

After the Mueller Report was a bust, that was proven to be total bullshit. Trump is now above the law politically and he’s just as likely to become Speaker in 2023 as he is to be elected president in 2024.

So, while it would otherwise make total sense for Pence to be a modern day John Dean…just don’t see it happening. I say this, even though logically the only way Pence has any shot of being president is to rebrand himself as a Trump slayer and change the political equation so he is a more palatable option than the fascists of DeSantis, Hawley, Pompeo or Cotton.

If he could somehow destroy MAGA, then Pence a ticket of Pence / DeSantis makes a huge mount of sense. But we’ve passed the tyrannical event horizon. There is no stopping MAGA other than a civil war at this point. But that high risk, high reward option is so horrific I don’t like to think about it.