The VergeCast Podcast Sucks

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I am well aware that the guys of the VergeCast podcast are far more knowledgeable about technology than I ever will be. But they really need to up their game.

I am growing to hate the VergeCast because there’s no there there. They spend what seems like 20 minutes mentally masturbating about the minutia of their wealthy lives and they just drone on and on about things that are only tangentially connected to technology.

My realization of this kind of snuck up on me. It wasn’t until they had those guest hosts in the middle of the summer that I realized what trash the VergeCast was. Those guest hosts were so completely vacuous and idiotic with their tech hot takes that I vowed to boycott the show until the regular hosts came back.

The last time I check in on the show, though, man, was it boring. Get to the point, people. I come to you for thoughtful, meaningful tech discussions not rambling monologue’s that exemplify how wealthy and out of touch you are.

Anyway, live long and prosper, guys. Ugh.

An Update On My Scifi Dramedy Novel For Oct. 22, 2025

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I did not get nearly as much work done on this novel today as I should have. I was just feeing meh and did not want to do anything all that productive. But there’s a chance I may get a second wind this evening and get more done.

I’m trying — trying — to write at least three scenes out a day. That’s the goal.

And I’m getting pretty good at doing that. But I have a lot more scenes to write and there’s always a risk that the whole thing will collapse in on itself AGAIN and I’ll have to start from scratch.

Usually, the whole collapsing in on itself happens because I realize something about the novel’s structure that causes me to stop believing in it.

Anyway, there’s always tomorrow. I’m growing more more nervous that if I don’t get this thing done by spring 2026 that something will happen to dramatically change the context of the whole effort.

My dream, of course, is to sell the novel in 2026, make enough money to get the fuck out of this tyrannical MAGA country and never look the fuck back. But that would be like winning the lottery.

As it stands, I’m probably going to be dodging bombs and bullets like everyone else whenever the country implodes because of fucking Trump. Uh. He’s America’s Hitler.

Colonizing New Worlds: Building a Society from Scratch on Earth-Clone Planets

Imagine waking up on a distant planet, an Earth-clone with breathable air, familiar gravity, and untamed wilderness. You step out of your pod with nothing but a blanket, a multi-tool, a fire-starter, and a water purifier. Your old life on Earth is gone forever, and your new home is a blank slate—except for the advanced telecommunications linking you to fellow settlers on two other planets and detailed maps provided by a mysterious galactic empire. This is the reality for the first wave of 3,000 pioneers, tasked with building a new human civilization from near-zero. Here’s how they’ll do it, from constructing forts in weeks to managing grief and laying the foundation for a gold-backed economy, all while ensuring the “wheels don’t pop off” their fledgling society.

The First Wave: Elite Pioneers Trained for Survival

The journey begins on Earth, at a sprawling university campus with a capacity for 60,000 students—think Ohio State or Michigan, repurposed as a training ground for humanity’s boldest. From billions of volunteers stored in a digital “database of humanity” (a kind of suspended animation via mind/DNA scans), the empire’s AI selects 10,000-15,000 candidates for rigorous vetting. Over 6-12 months, these hopefuls—30% aged 12-25 for energy and longevity, 60% 25-50 for expertise, and 10% over 50 for wisdom—are whittled down to 3,000 pioneers (1,000 per planet, split into 2-3 settlements of 300-500 each).

Training is intense and tailored to a near-zero start:

  • Survival Skills: Settlers practice building forts in 7-10 days using minimal kits (blankets, multi-tools). Teens learn lightweight tasks like gathering vines; adults tackle heavy labor like cutting timber. Everyone drills in foraging, fire-starting, and water purification, guided by empire-provided maps pinpointing resources like rivers or gold deposits.
  • Psychological Prep: Grief is inevitable—Earth is gone, and the loss will hit hard. Counselors (5% of settlers, ~15-25 per settlement) train in trauma care, running VR sims to process “end of Earth” shock. Teens get peer-support roles to keep morale high.
  • Governance and Tools: Trainees practice biometric gun protocols (weapons only fire for approved users, stored in fort armories with return slits) and mock councils to resolve disputes. They master inter-planetary comms, simulating cross-planet tips like “We found clay 2km north—try it for bricks.”
  • Young Settlers: Kids and teens (12-25) are key—they bring vigor and future-proof the colony. Training includes age-appropriate tasks (e.g., kids sort food, teens pan gold) to ensure everyone chips in.

By graduation, these pioneers are ready to land, build, and survive, with maps and training minimizing chaos.

Day 1-14: Building Forts in a Week or Two

Upon landing, each settlement of 300-500 hits the ground with purpose. The empire’s maps—detailing topography, gold deposits, timber, and hazards—guide them to defensible sites (e.g., hilltops near water). With everyone pitching in, including teens, here’s how they build a fort in 1-2 weeks:

  • Days 1-2: Teams form—adults cut logs, teens gather materials, elders plan layouts. Maps ensure quick resource finds (e.g., “Timber 500m west”). Blankets double as tent roofs; comms share early wins (“Planet 2: Vines make strong bindings”).
  • Days 3-7: A ~1-acre palisade rises—wooden stakes or mud walls, with a gate and a slit for returning biometric guns. Historical precedents like Jamestown’s 1607 fort show ~200 workers can do this in a week with clear plans.
  • Week 2: Reinforce walls, add watchposts, and build a central armory for guns and gold storage. Teens weave roofs; adults dig trenches. Comms keep planets aligned (e.g., “Planet 1’s mud-and-straw mix holds up in rain”).

Counselors hold nightly group sessions to manage grief, ensuring emotional stability as settlers work. Teens lead morale games, keeping younger kids engaged. By day 14, each settlement has a defensible fort, protecting against wildlife or disputes while setting the stage for growth.

Managing Grief: Keeping the Wheels On

Leaving Earth forever is a gut-punch. Grief could destabilize even the best-trained settlers, risking fights or despair. Counselors (~15-25 per settlement) are the glue:

  • Daily Check-Ins: 30-minute group talks post-work normalize loss. Teens share stories; adults vent. Comms let counselors consult across planets (e.g., “Planet 3: Your grief circle format cut distress—share details”).
  • One-on-One Support: Counselors handle ~20 settlers each, offering private talks for acute cases (e.g., panic over lost families). ASI monitors comms for distress signals, flagging risks early.
  • Year 1 Goal: Reduce severe grief to <10% by month 6. By Year 2, counselors shift to teaching or farming, staying on-call for flare-ups.

This keeps the society cohesive, channeling energy into fort-building and survival rather than chaos.

Seeding an Economy: Gold, Androids, and Fiat

With forts up, settlers need a system to trade resources beyond barter. Gold, abundant on Earth-clones (per maps), becomes the anchor for a fiat currency:

  • Month 1-3: ~30 settlers per settlement pan gold at map-indicated streams, yielding ~1-2 kg initially. Empire-provided androids (1-2 per settlement) collect and store gold in armory vaults, preventing hoarding. Teens join panning, fulfilling the “everyone chips in” ethos.
  • Month 3-6: Issue tokens (stamped metal) backed by gold—1 token = 1 gram. Settlers trade for food, tools, or services. Comms ensure planets standardize values, avoiding rivalries.
  • Years 2-5: Gold reserves grow; digital credits emerge via comms-based ledgers. Androids deactivate by Year 2, handing control to human councils. Maps guide new panning sites; comms share tech like sluices.
  • Years 6-100: As new waves arrive (500-1,000 per drop, no university training), pioneers teach panning and trade. By Year 20, planets hit 10,000-20,000 each, with robust economies. By Year 100, billions are settled, trading gold, crops, and tech across planets.

Androids keep early gold secure, tying into the biometric gun system to prevent takeovers. Maps ensure efficient resource use, and comms unify economic policies, keeping the wheels on.

Scaling Over 100 Years

The first wave’s forts and systems set the template:

  • Years 1-5: 3,000 pioneers (~1,000 per planet) build forts, manage grief, and seed economies. Comms share successes (e.g., “Planet 2’s waterwheel design doubles output”).
  • Years 6-20: New settlers zap in from the database, joining forts and learning from pioneers. Economies grow; comms prevent inter-planetary drift.
  • Years 21-100: Mass migration scales planets to millions, then billions. Towns replace forts, with gold-backed fiat supporting trade. Comms foster alliances, ensuring no planet dominates.

Why It Works

This plan balances a near-zero start with practical support:

  • Training and Maps: Pioneers are prepped for every challenge, from fort-building to grief, with maps cutting trial-and-error.
  • Grief Management: Counselors prevent emotional collapse, keeping settlers focused.
  • Economy: Gold and androids create trust in trade without breaking the zero-start ethos.
  • Comms: Inter-planetary knowledge-sharing ensures no settlement fails alone.

The galactic empire’s gift of maps and telecom, paired with human grit, turns 3,000 pioneers into the seed of a new civilization. By Year 100, billions thrive across three worlds, proving humanity can rebuild from nothing—blankets, courage, and all.

No, I Don’t Have Any Knowledge of Pictures of AOC in a Bikini

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

If you want to drive traffic to your little site all you have to do is put “AOC” and “bikini” in a title and watch people trickle in. People REALLY REALLY REALLY want to see photos of AOC in a bikini.

Now, as I’ve said, it’s rather sad that she can walk around in a bikini — and be photographed — without it being A Big Deal. She’s a beautiful woman, she should be able to wear a bikini like any other hot woman.

But, no, if there was even a hint of available photos of AOC in a bikini, Fox News would spooge so hard it may have a heart attack. Then all the Right would do is post the pictures online any time AOC wanted to make a serious policy point.

Ugh. It sucks, but that’s the systemic misogynistic world that we live in.

My Hot Take On Trump & The Epstein Files

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m of the opinion that there is no there there when it comes to Trump being in the Epstein Files. I think Trump knew damn well what Epstein was doing and did nothing.

But he did not actively participate in the evils that Epstein was doing on his island or whatever. So, all this bruhaha over the files is kind of like how Saddam would not like WMD inspectors into the country to poke around, even though there were no WMD there to be begin with.

It’s all ego on Trump’s part. And a paranoia that whatever is in the Epstein Files will make him look bad in some way. But not in the way we all hope where the Epstein Files are some sort of silver bullet for fucking MAGA.

I really hate MAGA. I really do. Bunch of fucking cocksuckers.

Update On My Scifi Dramedy Novel For October 21st, 2025

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m currently cruising towards the end of the first act for my latest attempt to write this scifi dramedy novel. My biggest irritation at the moment is I really want to show the first few scenes to some people, and yet, no.

It’s kind of bad luck to show people what you’re working on before it’s beta-draft ready. I say this in the context of in the past whenever I’ve shown any of my work to people either I don’t really like what they have to say one way or another or the whole thing collapses after they’ve looked at it so their advice is moot.

Ugh.

But my goal at the current moment is to just finish the first act. Usually, the most problematic issues with filling out an outline comes with the transitions between acts. For some reason that’s when I’m most likely to realize I’ve made some horrible structural mistake and I have to start all over again.

Anyway.

I really need to stop drifting towards my goal. I really need to focus and see working on this novel as something akin to my job. Until, that is, I have to get a real job.

Which is a very real possibility because of fucking Trump.

But I still have a few months — I think — before my life will change so dramatically that that becomes a necessity. As such, I really need to put up or shut up. I need to shup and and write, as they say.

Any Second American Revolution or Civil War Would Probably Make Our Lives Like The Movie ‘Threads’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I just don’t think the human mind can comprehend how horrific a Second American Civil War or Revolution might be. If things got as bad as I fear, we would be living in a real world ‘Threads’ movie.

Society would collapse, there would be Killing Fields, camps, extensive use of WMD by both sides. It would just be horrible. And, yet, here we are, with some on both sides chomping at the bit to have at it.

I just hope we muddle through. I really do. Even though I write all the time about civil war or revolution, I don’t actually want such a thing to happen. I’m just trying to make my abstract fears concrete.

Anyway. I have my doubts about us making it through 2026 or 2028. In both instances, I fear Trump will severely fuck with the Federal elections to the point that the country collapses in on itself.

Ugh.

We Need Something To Unite Us

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It would be so nice if there was some sort of Big Thing that could help unite humanity. Like, it would be cool if it seemed like a big asteroid was headed towards us and we spend a few years stewing about it but ultimately we discovered we were safe.

Something like that. Something where we would all be on the same page for once.

As it stands, the only thing that might cause something like that to happen is a revolution or civil war in the United States. That certainly would focus our collective minds, huh.

Anyway. I hope that doesn’t happen. That would suck.

I’m Not A Narc, But…

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I continue to be shocked at how much porn there is on Twitter. If you know what you’re doing, you can find high-quality (ha) extremely explicit porn on Twitter in a few seconds.

It’s pretty wild.

I keep double checking — for research purposes only, of course — and sure enough, within a few seconds I’m seeing graphic hard core porn. It’s really wild that no one else has notice this or make it an issue.

Surreal, even.

The Return (?) Of Hyper Femininity

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The rise of musical acts like Addison Rae has me wondering maybe hyper femininity is making a comeback. Rae has a really specific type of cutie-patootie persona that I find endearing.

It certainly would be nice — and a bit relaxing — if there were a few public figure women floating around like her. I’m not saying all women should adopt her hyper femininity, but just having that around as an option in the public space would be nice.

And I’m sure it’s all just an act. It always is. No one can be that girlie naturally. Anyway, no one listens to me. Carry on.