Category: Media

‘Honest Loyalty’ — Lyrics To Anti-Trump Ballad

One thing about Trumplandia is it constantly churns out song titles and lyrics. So, this would be a slow Radiohead type ballad of the OK Computer era. That’s the type of music I would like for this song, though the title does suggest something more akin to a mid-80s pop ballad or even a Bernie Taupin – Elton John type song. Anyway, I need to vent about Trumplandia in verse and you get this. This would be a romantic duet, the more I think about it. The whole Trump – Comey thing would be kind of a subtext.

Honest Loyalty
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform
@bumgarls

[her]
you want me to kiss your ring
make me only sing your tune
I refuse to give you want you want
nothing will change I’m afraid
though you ask for my loyalty

[chorus – both]
I’m only prepared to give you
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
take it or leave it

[him]
I vow to give you the world
if you give me your loyalty
give me what I crave
make it clear
you’ll always be mine
the rest will be divine

[bridge — both]
we thought we’d always be together
thought things would always break out way
but it seems as though only dismay
will hold sway

[chorus – both]
I’m only prepared to give you
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
honest loyalty
take it or leave it

‘Covfefe’ — Lyrics To An Anti-Trump Pop-Rock Protest Song

I have been reluctant to use this blog to write lyrics, but I enjoy writing lyrics too much, so even though for obvious legal reasons none of the lyrics I write will obviously ever be produced — the whole system of song writing is designed to prevent people like me from breaking into it — I have decided to write lyrics again anyway. The music for these lyrics in my imagination would be a peppy pop song. You would be so busy dancing that you wouldn’t really notice the lyric were kind of serious.

Covfefe
lyrics by Shelton Bumgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform
@bumgarls

walking down the street
smiling from my head to my feet
there’s a word that comes to mind
whenever I think of the blue wave
that will come crashing down on
our heads on election night my friend

covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
don’t let me waste your time
covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
what it means only we two know
late at night when love flows

but the people all around
think with my smile I’m a clown
I know, though, the cold hard truth
that only victory in November will do

covfefe means everything and nothing
as you can tell
it’s the word to wish someone well
when the blue wave reaches our shores
we’ll scream and shout and ask for more

covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
don’t let me waste your time
covfefe, covfefe, covfefe
what it means only we two know
late at night when love flows

[bridge]
what more can I do
what more can I say
but covfefe, covfefe, covfefe

things will soon be done
we’ll have our day in the sun
here’s what I want to exclaim
covfefe, covfefe, covfefe

While We’re All Distracted By Comey, Rome Is Burning

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

While we’re all eating our popcorn at the flaming dumpster fire that is the Trump Administration, the traditional social safety net that we’ve come to enjoy is being attacked in unprecedented ways. The issue for me is, regardless of whatever else is going on with Trump, his mere continued political presence is doing real harm to the American Republic.

An there is no reprieve in sight.

I say this because really, Trump is not going anywhere. The Vichy Republicans are so prostrate, so callow, so complicit in their support of someone — Donald J. Trump — who could be, in fact, effectively a foreign asset, that they are using whatever they can get to destroy important aspects of our government.

Or, put another way, it was inevitable that Republicans would again, at some point, be in power again by winning a presidential election and because of technology and the bullshit mountain known as FOX News, so the victory of Trump only, in a sense, sped the process up.

There is a more fundamental issue at work. That issue is because of tribal politics, we are, for the foreseeable future, going to swing back and forth in extremes. This all goes back to the question of, what exactly is the source of this. Why is the right so hysterical? Does it only have to do with the changing demographics of the United States?

The rise of Trumplandia is truly a nightmare scenario. That a major liberal democracy would fall under the sway of someone like Trump, for whatever reason, is pretty mind boggling. I am trying my best to avoid invoking Hitler’s name, but I can’t get around it. There is nothing else I can think of to compare it to.

Or put another way, the only thing that’s stopping Trump from being an American Hitler is he’s so completely incompetent that he can’t effectively impliment is more fascist, autocratic desires. That’s it, folk. That’s all that stands between America and fascism — Trump isn’t up to the job.

So, really, we are just going to have to wait until the mythical “Blue Wave” flips Congress before the pendulum swing back to sanity. It is to be seen how much damage Trumplandia will be able to wreak on the Republic. Probably significantly more than we ever imaged.

But I still have hope that once we finally do flip Congress that things will sort themselves out. But we have a long, long, long time to wait. We really need to just keep our powder dry and try to stay engaged. Don’t allow yourself to get burnt out from all the drama. That’s what Trumplandia wants. They want us to succumb to a “managed democracy.”

America has the strongest civil society in the world, so the cancer, the infection that is Trumplandia is being fought off as hard as possible by its antibodies. But there is only so much those antibodies can do. We’re just screwed.

At least in the near term, we’re screwed. Just try to stay engaged with people who disagree with you. That’s pretty much all we can do at this point. Trump’s sway over the nation is complete giving how Vichy the Republicans are and so for the time being he effectively has no check, no balance.

So try to keep focused on the real issues at hand. Keep an eye on what the Vichy Republicans are doing when it comes to Dodd-Frank and Obamacare. Once Trumplandia is finally vanquished, we’re going to have a lot of work to do to make America great like it was before Trump became president.

A Hot Take On James Comey’s Testimony

by Shelton Bumgarer
@bumgarls

While in some ways today lived up to the hype, in other, more fundamental ways I found it rather underwhelming. I found it underwhelming because the thing I had hoped for — some sort of iconic statement that would prove the final death knell of the Trumplandia experience simply did not happen.

And, alas, it seems as though it just isn’t going to happen.

What is really beginning to sink in — yet again — is how difficult it is to get rid of an American president once he’s in office. So, as long as there are no tapes — be they of a pee nature or otherwise — I have a growing fear that Trumplandia will be a fixture of the American political landscape for at least two years, if not much, much longer.

It seems to me that we’re in for a chronic case of Constitutional Crisis that will flair up every once in a while for the forseeable future. We’ve entered the age of tribal politics and the Republicans are so Vichy, so callow, so complicit in the rise of Trumplandia that they simply won’t do anything to ameliorate the situation until they are absolutely forced. It will nearly take the hand of God himself for Vichy Republicans to look past the base and put country over party.

It’s a sad fact, but given how it seems as though the GOP is hellbent on dragging James Comey’s reputation through the mud that that is exactly what is going to happen. There just aren’t any easy answers to how to fix the problems associated with Trumplandia. We’re stuck with it.

So, while the Comey hearing was dramatic and riveting, it did not really give me the political release that I was looking for. I didn’t get that perfect moment that could be used to end the cancer that is the Trump Administration.

If anything, it reminded me that we’re barely at the end of the beginning when it comes to this scandal. And, remember, to date, most of the damage inflicted on the Trump Administration has been self-inflicted. So, even though a fish rots from its head, it is almost inevitable that Trump will eventually untangle this clusterfuck of a presidency enough to survive, if not prosper.

Really, all we need is a war with the DPRK or Iran and suddenly everything will have worked itself out and the Tsar-a-Largo problem will be put on the backburner to such an extent that we won’t even remember it. And, remember, if a hayseed rube like me out in the sticks and see that possible out, then definitely Steve Bannon sitting in the White House can see it.

Thus anyone who is getting all excited about the prospect of getting Trump anytime soon should chill out. It’s just not going to happen for at least two years. That is the bare minimum. He could be around a lot longer than that. Much longer.

Therefore, all I can say is if you really want to end the Trumplandia Era, you need to engage, not rage against people who disagree with you politically. That’s it. That’s the only way it’s going to happen. It will be tough and you’ll be called a cuck and much worse by members of Trumplandia, but in the end it will be worth it. I swear.

Trumplandia As The Singularity’s Political ‘Event Horizon’

By Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

It seems very possible that the source of all the fear and “social anxiety” that has allowed an unstable racist, misogynist, bigot demagogue to rise to power in the United States might be laid at the feet of some sort of slow-moving technological singularity.

The reason why I suggest this is there must be some sort of reason for people being so afraid of the changes taking place in society. Those changes are happening so fast, in part, because of technology. So, maybe things are going to hell in a hand basket so quickly because, well, things are moving too fast for normal civil society to process it.

One could make the case that both Communism and Nazism came about by the fast pace of change that took place in the early 20ths Century. A lot happened technologically in the 1910-1940 period of time and since, say, about 1990 things have really begun to speed up again.

I have given it some thought, and the modern era really began with wide-spread adoption of the smartphone. And, really that’s the thing that allowed modern social media to take off. And this, of course, doesn’t even address the secondary effects of this slow moving technological Singularity that I suggest is taking place. I mean, self-driving semi-trucks haven’t hit the road yet, but we all know they’re coming.

Additionally, things like 3-D printing and nanotechnology will bring even more political change in the coming years. It isn’t too difficult for someone to wrap these technological changes up in an ideology and use them as a blunt force against the traditional post-war neo-liberal capitalist system.

The only thing that has saved us from that potentially destructive thing happening right now is Donald Trump and by extension Trumplandia doesn’t have an ideology.It’s just a rage against all change and it would make sense that the change it’s raging against is, in fact of a Singularity-like change.

So not only are people raging against the fast pace of social change caused by us approaching the Singularity, their rage, in a sense, is being channeled by the very technology that’s causing the trouble in the first place. Social media is not only causing great social change, it is also causing a Darwinian battle in the market place of ideas whereby only the strongest, most extreme ideas thrive.

Thus, the tribal politics that has infected American civil society could best be described as tech-tribal politics. In a way, one could say that while we’ve not reached the Singularity by any means, we have reached its Event Horizon. We’re now finally eternally locked in its gravitational field. Or put another way, we might, in a 100 years, look back and say the election of Donald Trump was the moment when the soon-to-come Singularity started to warp civil society in a demonstrative manner.

To go back to the issue of how this might be used in an ideological manner, it would make a lot of sense if today’s Trumplandia turned into something even more destructive, even more corrosive and even more dangerous to the world order. The barbaric populism and nationalism of Trumplandia might eventually evolve as we grow ever-closer to the Singularity into something more akin to technologically Maoism or Trotskyism. That these long-dead and horrible ideologies might pop back up is shocking to thin about, of course, but I doubt any of us have really given the political power of the Singularity a lot of thought.

We’re so busy daydreaming out how we’re going to upload our minds into computers and live forever, that we totally miss the idea that a demagogue like Donald Trump might lead a nation like the United States down a dark and scary path once the Even Horizon of the Singularity has been reached. You can tall about a Universal Basic Income all you like, but given the tribal politics of the United States, it’s highly unlikely to ever happen, even once automation and robotics take all the jobs.

That is, of course, when we all look at each other and ask, “Now what?”

Answer that question will be the biggest problem faced by modern liberal democracies in the years and decades to come. There just isn’t an easy answer and into that void someone like Trump — or hell, even Trump himself given how fast things are moving now — will come crashing in and lead us all into a dark, scary time not seen since the 1930s.

Interestingly enough, once this process is over, the very idea of the nation-state may fade and the world will be divided into ethno-spheres. But the process of cracking the existing order to do that might involve huge numbers of people dying.

Hopefully the process will be significantly less destructive than what brought about today’s existing order, but there are no assurances. Trumplandia has sped up our political hurdling towards the technological Singularity and we all have to be prepared for the shake up that is to come.

We live in extraordinary times and Trump isn’t going anywhere. By the time the system finally gets unglued, no sooner than two years from now, some truly momentous things may have happened. Weirdly enough, for a movement build on rejecting the fast pace of change during the Obama years, Trumplandia itself is now set to really shaking things up in a manner that may take decades for us to process.

Shelton Bumgarner is the editor and publisher of The Trumplandia Report. He may be reached at migukin (at) gmail.com.

Testimony or Trump Speech? That Is The Question

By Christian Howard

I like many other Americans are facing quite the predicament in my schedule on Thursday. For weeks I had been anticipating James Comey’s testimony, but it seems our dear president will be delivering a speech at the Faith and Freedom event. Isn’t that rather coincidental?

Comey will begin testifying at 10:30 A.M. and Trump’s speech should commence at 12:30 P.M. Now I’m going to put a rather bold prediction out that Comey will still be testifying against Trump in court long after Trump’s little speech. It can’t be too long that Trump rattles on before running out of words. Hey, maybe I’ll even be able to tune into both.

In all seriousness however, I’m anxious to hear what the former FBI director has to say. Scattered comments and stories have come out across the news from Comey, but now he will speak on a direct platform in a court of law. Did Trump really attempt to obstruct justice? Probably. But the real question is if Trump will face the consequences for his actions. This election and administration has drained my optimism and I doubt Trump will be charged despite any amount of evidence.

Besides what actually happens if Trump is charged, more evidence is uncovered, and an impeachment hearing proceeds? If Trump does face impeachment the national will gain a much more competent president and one that can effectively push their destructive agenda. Our president is currently making a mockery of democracy, defacing our ties with other countries, and has ultimately made us an international embarrassment, but without really achieving anything he set out too.

The wall isn’t constructed, the travel ban is locked up in legality, and ISIS is still running wild after his ingenious 30 day plan. Really the area he has been most effective in is simply just blocking and negating progress. As seen from his refusal to sign the Paris Accord, work with other leaders, and a possible NAFTA withdrawal. I guess I have to give Trump credit where it’s due and also declare him a Twitter master.

Speaking of Twitter, if you aren’t able to make Donnie’s speech because of the Comey hearing, he may have set up a nice, interactive activity for the viewers. Insiders from the White House have informed the press that Donald is planning to be live tweeting during the Comey testimony. I’m assuming this is just in case Comey attempts to spread any fake news and old Donald has to set him straight.

Trump’s lawyers are urging him not to take to Twitter, though he seems pretty adamant on doing just that. I for one hope Trump rightfully defends himself on social media and is able to expose the truth behind the investigation. Honestly though, I just can’t wait for the goldmine that is Trump’s Twitter tomorrow if he does follow through with this and seeing if Trump can actually get himself into trouble while actively trying to avoid it.

America has finally fully embraced its celebrity and reality television culture to the whole to the point where Donald Trump is my president. Well now I guess I sit back and watch and see what spicy drama stirs up after tomorrow. I urge all to watch Comey’s testimony and have a look for themselves at what our president is hiding.

Let’s Play Pretend: What If The Russians Really Did Hack The Election?

By Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I am not one of those who thinks the Russians managed to actually hack into our election booths and throw the election, and, yet, it is kind of weird that Hillary Clinton lost Pennsylvania and Florida. Spooky weird.

So, let’s play pretend.

What could we do, after the fact, if we proved 100% that Russian hackers had managed to hack into our election systems and throw the election for Donald Trump. Then what?

Well, the short answer is: WE ARE COMPLETELY FUCKED.

There simply is no effective method to nullify a presidential election. It’s not like we can recall the Electoral College and tell them to vote for someone else. That ship, as they say, has sailed. It is not a bug, but a feature of our system that it’s so difficult to get rid of a president once he or she is in office. It’s that stability that has helped us weather any number of catastrophes over the centuries.

I mean, even if we got rid of Trump, we still have Pence who is not as bad as Trump in some ways because he’s at least sane, but worse in others because he has an ideology that he adheres to when it comes to his absolute world view. And there is zero possibility that the Vichy Republicans would impeach BOTH Trump and Pence, and even if they did, we have Paul Ryan to deal with, who is a gutless stooge to Trump if ever there was one.

So, really, there’s nothing we can do. The revelation that the Russians had successful hacked out election would probably cause a epic, if momentary, Constitutional Crisis, but the thing that people like me want — a center-Left president who does what Hillary Clinton would have done had she become president simply is completely, totally impossible. It simply is not going to happen.

We’re stuck with Republicans for a sold two year and they can do all sorts of damage to the traditional welfare state between now and 2019, which would be the earliest we could start to fix this problem and that only works on the assumption that a Blue Wave might flip the Congress Democratic.

And, really, the only scenario that comes anywhere near being a reality is in 2019 the Democratic Congress manages to impeach both Trump and Pence, blocks Pence from naming a successor and then we endup with President Nancy Palosi. That’s pretty much an impossible scenario for various reasons, in large part because the hysterical 30% of the population who hates Hillary Clinton would hate Nancy Palosi just as much. America has some serious fucking problems in its political system and they ain’t going no where anytime soon. Let that sink in, folks.

So, dry your tears. Pull yourself up. We’re fucked. Really, the only thing we can do is, as I keep suggesting, engage people who disagree with us. Try to overcome tribal politics as best we can and try to heal the bizarre wounds that risk tearing the nation asunder.

The Struggle Is Real: How To Address Trump In Art

By Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I am working on a novel, or at least trying to, and I’ve decided to make the dystopian world that Donald Trump seems to want to create as my playground. But it’s tough. Things are moving so fast in reality, that it’s difficult for me to grapple with how to address Trump in fiction.

I don’t know. I just don’t know. Maybe that’s why Hollywood has been so slow to talk about Trump directly. It wants to sit things out a little bit before it tries to help us collectively process things. But we’ll see, I guess It will be interesting to see how things play out.

Hollywood, Take Note: Isaac Asimov’s ‘Mule’ Is An Allegory For Donald Trump

By Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

I keep talking about and feel like I’m shouting out into the void, but here I go again. The reason why I keep talking about how Isaac Asimov’s character in The Foundation Saga, The Mule, is Donald Trump is because Trump isn’t funny anymore.

For nearly two years, we’ve spent a lot of time joking about Trump and it’s time we stopped falloning Trump and started to take him as the tragic, Shakespearean character that he is. Trump is doing real damage to America both at home and abroad and it makes a lot of sense for Hollywood to stop lashing out randomly at Trump and start to weld its cultural power in a much more constructive manner.

Hence, a movie that dealt with just the portion of The Foundation Saga that deals with The Mule would be pretty cool and culturally powerful because for much of the novel, The Mule is something of a comic character. It’s only later, when his true identity is reveled that he becomes dark and sinister.

I feel like we’ve reached the point in the Trump saga when if you made a reasonably faithful adaption of The Foundation Saga that you might have a pretty big hit on your hands, on a par with A Game Of Thrones. Of course, given how much Star Wars copped from Foundation, you would have to be pretty creative to to make the universe seem fresh.

But if you simply made a movie about the specific part of The Foundation Saga that deals with The Mule, I think you could pull it off.

The Madness Of King Trump, Redux: How Will History Judge This Era?

by Shelton Bumgarner
@bumgarls

Maybe we’re all missing the point. Maybe the only way to save the Republic was, at least for a short time, to burn it to the ground. What I mean by this is maybe if Hilary Clinton had won things would have been even worse than they are now — that even seems possible.

My only hope is maybe all of this will burn itself out. Maybe only by proving the point — that Trump was and is completely unqualified to be president — that is the only way we can dig ourselves out of this whole. If Trump was out of power at this point, he’d be spouting off and riling people up without the consquences of being in power.

With him in power eventually, inevitably, there has to be, just has to be some political consquences to pay. He can continue to live in his own lala land forever. At some point — it may take a lot longer than I’d like — we collectively as a nation will reject Trumplandia and everything will go back to normal and we can forget about this horrible, surreal turn of events.

That, of course, is the most hopeful spin one can put on this disaster. I guess you could have made the same case about Hitler in 1933. But this is the United States, not Germany, so I’d like to think our civil society is stronger than theirs was during the rise of Hitler.

So, I guess what I’m saying is this could either be just a hiccup in our nations journey, or it be that this is when the final dystopian reality descends on the United States for good. I guess, really, it all depends on us as individuals which one it is.

But I’d like to think our civil society is stronger than the madness of one leader. But maybe I’m deluding myself. Maybe it isn’t. Maybe power has been concentrated in the hands of the executive to such an extent that there’s no going back. And given how the Vichy Republicans are completely complicit in all of this, it seems as though this is a wilderness we’re not going to get out of easily.

It goes without saying, I think, that there are many, many books to be written about Trumplandia in the years and decades ahead. I would like to think this is just a blip. That Trumplandia will, in fact, burn itself out. I have to have that hope, otherwise I get depressed and don’t engage.