My heroine has the general phenotype of Corrie Yee. I’m giving myself about a day to kind of chill out before throwing myself back into the novel. I do this every once in a while. In the past, when I had more money, I would go to NYC for a little Writer’s Retreat.
Alas, I now live in abject poverty.
Anyway, here are a revised first few scenes of the third draft. I’m well on my way to revising them, but this will give you some sense of where things stand.
It’s time. I have got to start to push myself when it comes to wrapping up this third draft. I have a fairly stable first two chapters of the third draft, now is time to zoom through the first act. Once I hit the second act, things SHOULD move even faster.
My heroine looks a lot like Corrie Yee in my mind. I have written and re-written so much of this novel, that once I get the new beginning of the novel done, then, zoom, I hope to wrap up the third draft no later than maybe April. I know full well that if I don’t keep and eye on the calendar, it could be fall 2024 before I finish the third draft and the whole world could be being coming apart at the seams.
Anyway. It’s officially put up or shut up time. I have got to finish this third draft ASAP so I can piviot to the next step in the process – querying.
Now that I have pretty much built the cornerstone of the third draft by having a stable first chapter, I can get down to business. There is the issue of a ‘canon.’ To date, I have kept canon up to date in my mind by simply reading and re-reading what I’ve already written.
Heroine of my first novel looks like Corrie Yee, phenotype wise. But that has led me to grow very unhappy with what I’ve written and, as such, rewrite everything. This has obviously slowed me down a great deal. But I took a look at the new version of the first chapter today and realized my heart wasn’t in it. This is a good sign — I can now throw myself into finishing the rest of the first act.
And what SHOULD happen once I finish the first act is things go very, very fast. That would put me on track to finishing the third draft of the novel no later than, say, around April 1st. That’s the hope, at least.
President of Hollywood, are you out there in the aether, reading? Then I would have all summer to figure out how to afford a professional manuscript consultant to look at the novel before I query in in the fall — just as my world — and everyone else’s — is thrown up in the air because of a potential “perfect storm” of the Fourth Turning and a some sort of Petite Singularity.
Or we might actually punt our problems down the road such that I can try to enter the querying process in peace and quiet. If I legitimately thought someone in some way connected to the Hollywood industrial complex was interested in this novel I MIGHT post the stable first chapter of the novel just to give them a taste of what I have.
But I am well aware that by saying that outloud that some asshole will use a proxy to make it SEEM like someone with Hollywood connections was lurking out there in the aether reading this blog.
So, lulz, not going to do that.
But the first chapter is shaping up to be really, really good. I rewrite a lot of it recently because I used AI to give a sense if it was any good and it told me “not enough tension.” So, I reworked it to make the things a bit more tense and give the thing a bit more of a flow.
I am well aware that many, many other people are doing the same damn thing I’m doing and they’re not drunk cranks. I know anyone doing due diligence on me would probably conclude I was too much of a freaky weirdo to give a old drunk crank like me a chance.
The moment I think I have a stable first little bit of this third draft of the novel, everything collapses. So, I dunno. I guess I have a stable first chapter? Maybe? It’s possible? I really like what I’ve come up with, regardless.
Yes, President of Hollywood, I’m working as fast as I can. I’ve reworked the first scene YET AGAIN, this time so it has more tension in it and is more focused. But the changes I’ve made in the story have now forced me to rewrite everything that comes after it. This. Happens. All. The. Time. I think that’s a sign that my storytelling ability is getting a lot — A LOT — better.
I hope.
Anyway, I continue to fall apart on a physical basis. I have some real concerns about the state of my teeth. I don’t know what I’m going to do about that in the near to middle term. I have a fear things are going to get really, really bumpy, only to sort themselves out in a way I can live with.
It’s just going to suck in the near term. Ugh!
I hope I can sprint between now and Christmas when my next de facto deadline is. Christmas is when some relatives will return who I will feel compelled to show at least the first scene to. They were quite pleased with the last version I showed them, then I asked ChatGPT about what I had written and it said, in effect, “This sucks — no tension.”
So I went back to the drawing board and gave the first scene more focus and more tension. I’ve learned a lot of my problems come from simply having too fucking much going on in a scene. Just by cutting long, meandering scenes into shorter, more focused scenes, I fix a lot of problems.
I have also realized I have to hurry up. I can’t keep screwing around. I have a limited amount of time — I’m NOT going to live forever. I’m already in my 50s and not only may AI make all my hard work moot, the prospect of a significant political crisis in the United States starting in late 2024, early 2025, is a “not great, Bob” type situation.
I fear there is going to come a moment in the very near future where the context of me writing a novel will change dramatically. I have written and developed this novel in a rather idyllic situation but all good things must come to an end. If nothing else, this knowledge encourages me to work as hard as possible to finish the third draft of this novel ASAP.
The thing about these fears is it could be that things will suck for a while…then turn out alright. Even if my teeth problems worse and I lose a few because I’m poor and can’t afford a root canal….then maybe I’ll sell this novel and have enough funds to fix that particular situation?
A guy can dream.
Anyway, I’m also old. And at the same age Stieg Larsson was when he dropped dead (50.) But he had sold three novels at that point. I, on the other hand, don’t even have a third draft finished.
The meaning of (my) life. But this third draft will be the last structural draft. Any drafts beyond this will be just for editing. Though if I somehow magically find the funds to show this third draft to a manuscript consultant…I suppose I might have even MORE structural changes to implement.
Yet I know — KNOW — that this is a great story. The story is probably going to be closer to The Girl On The Train’s ~140,000 word count that the ~100,000 word sweetspot for a first novel. But, lulz, I’m hoping all the “spicy” scenes in the first act will get people interested enough to finish the fucking thing.
One thing I’m leaning into is how people can change over the course of 25 years. This is one of those things where even though it’s felt like I’ve been spinning my wheels for months, I actually am slowly stumbling across some new, important elements to the story.
Among these improvements is significantly better characterizations. I have two secondary POV characters that have gone from just meh “vibes” into really unique people with sharp edges that make them really, really interesting. I have long written on character specifically with Jessica Chastain in my mind as I write the character.
I really liked her in Zero Dark Thirty and, as such, in the last two novels in this six novel project I have a hardass FBI agent who drives my hero nuts. But now that I’ve been really rooting around in the events that lead to those last two novels — which are meant to be an allegory for how fucked up modern America is — I realize that there is a lot of interesting avenues I can go.
As such, we meet this future FBI agent as a 90s Riot Grrrl. This makes her transformation 25 years later even greater. So she goes from being depicted in the novel like this:
To this:
I think that’s pretty cool! So, over the course of six novels — and 25 years — we gradually see this character morph from a passionate Riot Grrrl into a very conventional, serious FBI agent who drives the Hero of the last two novels crazy with what an asshole she is to him.
People love, love, love to pick on male authors for all being a bunch of clueless hornytoads when it comes to the female characters that they write. I’m so self-conscious of this issue that I over think everything to do with my female characters.
My heroine looks like Corrie Yee. Then, of course, I turn around and turn my heroine into a part-time sex worker (stripper.) And given that I often write from a female POV, I find myself in a situation where I just can’t avoid talking about T&A, even though that’s the very thing that the fucking “woke cancel culture mob” things I have no right to describe at all as a CIS white middle age male.
But I dunno. It’s typical of my lot in life that I would inevitable gravitate straight towards the most problematic situation possible. And given that I’m a smelly CIS white middle age male, for some members of the “woke cancel culture mob” there just isn’t anything I can write that they would validate. So, fuck it, why not just endure the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and see what happens.
I like to THINK that I can write about women as a male author that won’t be embarrassing or cause women in the audience to want to throw the book across the room. But the whole sex worker element of the novel definitely makes it a provocative novel in the context of how sexless the “woke cancel culture mob” tends to be.
I’m happen with what I’ve come up with. I know people will really enjoy this novel once I finish it. The question is, of course, will the liberal white women who are often literary agents be cool with not just the contents of this novel but the fact that it was written by a smelly CIS white middle aged male.
I measure the development of this novel not in words but in scenes, with each scene being about 1,000 words. So, I’m aghast that my first act has ballooned to 60 scenes. If you assume 60 + 50 (25 + 25) + ~30….oh boy. If I assume 60 scenes for the first act, then about 50 scenes for the second act and maybe 30 scenes for the third act…I got a problem on my hands.
“I can’t wait forever!” — President of Hollywood I have a real problem on my hand. That would be ~140,000 words. And, yet, maybe not. A lot will depend on how long each scene is and I wildly miscalculated that issue with the second draft. I came in at 80,000 words after allotting myself 100,000 words. The issue was that all many of third act scenes were really, really short.
There are three ways to solve this issue.
One is to just accept that I’m going to blow past the sweetspot of ~100,000 words and take comfort in the fact that The Girl On The Train is about 140,000 words. Another is to hope that I’ve totally misjudged things again and the story will somehow magically fit into the around 100,000 word range. And, last of all, is the most drastic — cut the thing into two.
I think my best bet at the moment is it just finish the novel then take an assessment. If I fall within around 140,000 words, then I think I’ll just fight for that vision and try to pick a novel of that length.
Or I might write another — maybe scifi — novel that DOES fit into the ~100,000 sweetspot and then once I sell that use the success of that novel to sell my first, longer novel.
The point is to 1) finish the novel 2) tell a good story.
Just as I got finished writing a post about how I was paring back some of the more unique elements of my heroine’s appearance, I completely reversed myself. This happens all the time and it’s part of my creative process. I get really insecure about something, change my mind, then change it back when I grow more comfortable about whatever it was that was bothering me.
Anyway. For the time being, I know what my heroine looks like — Nicole Scherzinger in her early 30s. It’s not a perfect one to one, but, in general, that’s the general image I have in my mind as I write. And I’ve sprinkled in some magic fairy dust to make flesh out that general phenotype.
The reason why my heroine has a tattoo is specifically to tell the reader that a specific thing is REALLY important to her. Because it helps with plot and character, I’ve decided to put it back in, even though there was a moment there when I thought I should take it out.
Yes, President of Hollywood — time for me to put up or shut up. But I’m really pleased with my heroine. I think she’s really engaging and interesting and people will want to spend some time with her — at least long enough to finish the damn novel.
I have very, very low expectations for this novel — no matter how good it is — because, lulz, I’m a bonkers middle age CIS white male living in the middle of no where who has never gotten anything published before.
Maybe it won’t be this novel, but my NEXT novel that I get published. But finishing this novel and it not suck will be the greatest accomplishment of my life to date.
If nothing else, my heroine is very unique and interesting. She’s definitely her own thing. And yet, she’s obviously influence by a combination of Lisbeth Salander, Fleabag, Mare of Easttown and Jlo in Hustlers. You know, the good stuff.
Now to finish the novel and bring her into the hearts and minds of (millions?) of people.
Things are going really fast with this novel. But there’s one thing I find myself suddenly pondering in an unexpected way — what my heroine looks like. I had all this stuff about her thought out then something hit me. And that is the “hat on a hat” problem.
My heroine looks like a younger Nicole Scherzinger in my mind. I know how this happened — the moment I put her in a position where she might be seen stripping “to relax” everything else needed to be rethought. As such, I’m pretty sure I’m going to pare back some elements of her appearance. She is already going to be “the girl who strips” and it would be a little too much for her to have a SECOND weird thing about her in the guise of some sort of tattoo that would serve as a mental marker in people’s minds.
I don’t like the idea that reviewers would simply say I was turning Lisbeth Salander into a stripper. Ugh.
So, I think any tattoos that my heroine has will be far more discrete than I originally imagined.
But I will note that I have a tendency to say one thing then do another when it comes to this novel. And, yet, I am starting to understand a number of elements of this novel a lot better. I’ve really fleshed out a number of secondary characters that before were rather meh.
I’m leaning into the idea that, lulz, a lot can change about a person over the course of 25 years, so it’s ok if I introduce a character one way and then they endup totally different at the end of the six novel project.
Anyway, because of personal and emotional turmoil caused by Thanksgiving, I fear I won’t get nearly as much work done on this novel as I’d like. Ugh. It’s so frustrating that I have to pause the novel while I wait for a private storm to pass.
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