A Hot Take On ‘Barbie’

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I was quite pleased with the Barbie movie for a number of reasons. It was pretty much the political sweetspot of what I generally believe about gender politics. I can see why conservatives might consider the movie “woke,” but, in general, it seemed like just a a good movie that told a good story.

That is what struck me about the nature of the movie — it was really good. I was impressed with Greta Gerwig’s storytelling ability. I have been a fan of hers since “Frances Ha” and I knew going into the movie that it was probably going to tell a silly story in an interesting way.

As an aside, I do think that the success of Barbie may — possibly — suggest that we’re about to have something to the mythical “vibe shift” that everyone was talking about in the recent past. It’s just a short jaunt to a more gritty mainstream movie. Though, I’ve given this a lot of thought and I just don’t think our society is at a point for the legendary type of movies of the early 70s to come back.

But it is at least possible that superhero movies are on their way out. We’ve had them dominate the box office for about 20 years and so it’s inevitable that something will replace them at some point. But what? And when? I just don’t know the answer to that question.

I still think it’s at least possible that AI is going to make all these musings moot when at some point — probably after we sort things out in a Fourth Turning — the very notion of “mass media” will seem rather quaint. We’ll just sit down in front of our TVs, have our faces scanned and out will pop a movie or TV show directly tailored to how we’re feeling at that specific moment.

That seems nearly an immutable force of history and technology at this point.

But back to Barbie — the movie, in my opinion, did what a good movie is supposed to do — tell an interesting story in a way that left you mulling what you’ve just seen once it was over. How the movie dealt with the issue of “the patriarchy” was really amusing to me and, what’s more, it was presented in such a way that young women might take heart.

Which, of course, is why that very element of the movie freaks conservative so much.

‘Living In Denial’ — #lyrics To #pop #rock song

Living In Denial
lyrics by @sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

the seas are boiling
but at least you’re close to me
things are getting hot
I wish we had somewhere to flee
but I’m afraid that has no
viability
but in the end you’ll be by my side
as we all slowly cook

living in denial
is enough to make one roar
we all know the score
the adults in the room
just want to zoom
’cause they’re
living in denial
living in denial
living in denial

don’t mean to rile you up
but maybe I do
if I think about it
don’t button your shirt
rather loosen your tie
we’ve got a lot to think about
given that we all may die
’cause we’re
living in denial
living in denial
living in denial

(bridge)
when things cool down
and see the return of seasons
maybe we’ll look back and laugh
at how it was all a gas
but I’m afraid Mother Nature
is going to have the last laugh

living in denial
is enough to make one roar
we all know the score
the adults in the room
just want to zoom
’cause they’re
living in denial
living in denial
living in denial

I Have A Lot Of Work Still To Do

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Now that I’m working on the third draft of this novel, I realize I have a lot of work to do that I didn’t really think about earlier. Not only is there a few characters that I really need to flesh out more, there is a whole ideology that I have to figure out.

And, this doesn’t even address some serious problems with the third act that I need to address. The third act needs to be completely re-worked. Not only do some elements just not make any sense, but I also need to totally rework the climax which is rather hackish.

Thankfully, I have another month built into the timetable that I can use to figure out how I can fix all of this. I really need to game out a number of different structural things about the novel in August before I sit down to really throw myself into writing agian.

But that’s part of the fun. I really want to prove that I am a good-to-great storyteller and all the haters who think I suck can fuck off. My writing and storytelling have improved a great deal in the last few years and I think with some more hard work I can take things to the next level with the third draft.

That’s the dream, at least.

I also have to start reading more books in my genre so I can “comp” them when I begin the querying process. I am well aware of how delusional I’m being to think I can — at my age and background — ever become a traditionally published author in any way. But, lulz, freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.

Is Tiny Fey Going To Take Over SNL After 2025?

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Much to my chagrin, I realized I miscalculated when it came to when the 50th season of SNL is. It’s not THIS season, but NEXT season. Anyway, that’s not really the point of this post — the point is: who is going to replace Lorne Michaels at SNL?

Apparently, the rumor is that the job is Tina Fey’s if she wants it. She would do a great job. She is my favorite pick, at the moment. But she is a really busy person with a lot on her plate and the case could be made that her career is too well developed for her to want the job, no matter how prestigious it might be.

There are two other people I think might be dark horse candidates — Seth Meyers and John Mulaney. Both of them are a little younger than Fey and could potentially be in the job a lot longer.

I could totally see Fey being something of a transitional figure for the show, only being willing to serve a few years before handing the gig off to someone else. If Fey doesn’t get / want the job, my bet is on Mulaney because he’s 40 and could grow into the job.

There is the risk, of course, that whenever Michaels retires, that will be it for the show. I’ve heard chatter that NBC suits hate the show for being too complicated and expensive. Of course, it’s possible that if NBC pulls the plug on the show that a streamer like Netflix might pick it up without a hiccup.

I Really Need To Visit New York City Again

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I really love New York City and, if I hadn’t blown out an emotional knee after South Korea, I probably would have saved up the money to move there when I came home the last time. But my mind was so scrambled at that moment in time that that just wasn’t practical.

So, here I am, at 50, longing to have enough money just to visit the Big Apple. The thing that really grates on my nerves is the cold, hard, fact that even if I blow up with my DJ money (sell a novel) that I can never be young in the big city. I’ll just be an old man whose peers are all middle aged empty nesters and here I am, an old bachelor.

But I’m not dead yet, as they say.

And, yet, it’s times like these that my age really hits home. I have all these dreams and aspirations for what I’ll do if I ever magically “make it big” but I have to accept that I just won’t get what I want. The entire context of any success I might have at this point will be totally different than what I want.

Not only will I have to explain why I haven’t done anything with my life for about 20 years, if I become as successful as I believe I should be, everything will be frame in the context of, “How does it feel to be a success later in life?”

But my age is really at the forefront of my mind these days. The clock is ticking and I really need to be mindful about how limited my time on earth is. Wish me luck.

‘Let’s Go Home’ #lyrics to a #pop #rock #ballad

Let’s Go Home
lyrics by @sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

in the still of evening
we see each other in greeting
I hold your hand
in the grocery store
with longing and a desire for more
so I turn to you and say
baby

let’s go home
stop our roaming
let’s go home
let’s go home
stop our roaming
let’s go home

the sun has set
making me regret
the distance of the day
when I fret that you may
have drifted away
with a co-worker
much to my dismay
baby

let’s go home
stop our roaming
let’s go home
let’s go home
stop our roaming
let’s go home

(bridge)
when we arrive home
we race to bed
so we can give each other head
we come to the conclusion
that this is the way
things are meant to always be

let’s go home
stop our roaming
let’s go home
let’s go home
stop our roaming
let’s go home

Having My Heroine Obsessed With John Lennon Is Adding Significant Richness To Her Character

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

After years of my heroine being a fluid “idea” or “mood’ I’ve finally begun to get a handle on who she is. She a little younger than I thought she would be and she’s also a lot more colorful and interesting. She definitely is no longer just an female, Amerasian version of me, but rather her whole different thing.

A lot of this has come from reading a biography of John Lennon. I should have done a lot of this research some time ago, lulz. Anyway, I still think having her obsessed with Lennon will really be a useful hook for not just audiences, but any eventual marketing of the novel.

I’m really leaning into every possible element of John Lennon I can when it comes to the nature of my heroine’s personality and worldview. Given that the more I read about Lennon, the more I’m reminded of how problematic he is, my heroine’s obsession with him definitely provides some much-needed distance between her personality and mine.

The additional ~20,000 words I’m adding to the novel are dealing a lot with onboarding, world building and character development. I’m trying my hardest to actually show things on the page to the reader so they can center themselves and actually care about the characters when shit goes down later in the story. That’s the vision, at least .

Anyway. Because I’m writing the third draft from scratch, I have a lot of opportunities to flesh out the heroine’s personality in ways I did not before. And I continue to find the idea that she is obsessed with Lennon very intriguing and a way to make her really unique in a way that the audience will find appealing.

The Third Draft Is Going Really Well So Far

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

While I continue to try to read as much as possible — especially about John Lennon — the siren call of writing the third draft has proven too powerful. I’ve begun to write the third draft about a month sooner than I had planned. But this has more to do with the abject failure — to date — of the Beta Reader process than anything else.

I also know that I continue to be in something of a surreal situation where I have “all the time in the world” to work on a novel and I just don’t know how long that is going to last. All good things must come to an end, and all that. I really need to focus on writing a third draft so I can turn around and have a professional or semi-professional read it.

All that will take time, so, as such, I think I’m probably looking at about a year from now before I can really start to query in ernest. Which, of course, will be just about the time either AI takes over all entertainment and / or The Fourth Turning happens and changes the entire context of everything I’ve been working on.

But if we do just slip peacefully into autocracy as I suspect, then the audience for this project will increase significantly, given that I use subtext to rant about how much I hate MAGA and extremism.

Anyway. I really need to focus. I need to get my shit together so I can actually not just finish this first novel but also begin to work out the specifics of the other five novels in the project. My age is really beginning to sink in and I know that even if I stick the landing, the first novel in this series probably won’t hit bookshelves until I’m in my mid-50s.

This generates no end of existential angst.

MAGA Has Gone Septic

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It continues to appear as though, baring something I can’t predict, 2024 is going to Be It. We’re going to make an existential decision — one way or another — as to the fate of our democracy. The 2024 presidential cycle could be the most historically significant since 1860.

But there is a lot still up in the air about what, specifically, will happen. There are four possible options, it seems. One is, Trump wins outright and we peacefully slide into autocracy. The next possibility is, Trump wins and there’s some sort of “Resistance Revolution.” Another option would be Trump loses and there’s a civil war when Red States begin to leave the Union. And then, of course, there is the least likely possibility — Biden or some other Democrat wins and we just punt things down the road again.

At the moment, I just can’t figure out which of those four options will actually become a reality. I’m always, always wrong, so it’s probably going to be some outcome that I just can’t predict.

But I do think that at the moment the most likely outcome is Trump wins again and smug liberals just leave the country. The United States will peacefully slide into autocracy and before you know it we’ll have a MAGA-induced Constitutional Convention and we’ll have some sort of MAGA Enabling Acts bolted onto the Constitution.

It seems to me that the United States will follow the path of Russia over the last 20 years in which we slide into autocracy. The big issue is, of course, will it be a “light touch” autocracy or will our new autocrat be so insecure that they begin to consolidate power in a way that it bumps up against the American self-perception that we’re a democracy.

That is the real crux of what we face in late 2024, early 2025. At the moment, I think people are just to blase and no matter how radical Trump’s incoming agenda is, nothing of note is going to happen in regards to any sort of resistance. We’ll become a MAGA-themed autocracy and that will be that.

And, yet, there is a greater-than-zero chance that if Trump’s incoming agenda is really as radical as we all fear, that something extraordinary might happen. And that doesn’t even begin to address the possibility of a civil war if Trump loses. I could totally see Red States — starting with, say, Texas — leaving the Union in late 2024, early 2025 if Trump loses.

But, again, it’s at least possible that we’ll just punt things down the road again. I just don’t know what is going to happen at the moment.

The Vision Thing For This Six Novel Project

by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

While it’s clear that I’m so old now that I could just drop dead at any moment and all my dreams will be very moot, in general, here’s my vision for the six novels I’m working on.

My heroine looks like a younger version of Olivia Munn.

The point of the six novels is you will get to see, over the course of 25 years, the arc of all the characters first introduced in the first novel. The last two novels are meant to be something of an allegory for modern America but yet they will be good enough at face value that you will enjoy them for what they are: techno mystery-thrillers.

That’s the dream, the vision at least.

These six novels are meant to be the precursor to an open-ended series of novels about an American Lisbeth Salander-type character who goes on global missions doing all kinds of Mission:Impossible and James Bond type stuff. The dream is, if these first six novels are a success that I will have the resources to, say, have a novel set in Asia or some such.

I know I’m being both delusional and extremely ambitious, but, lulz, freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose. I need something, anything to keep me going, keeping me breathing and a project as ambitious as this is exactly what I’m looking for.

But, as I keep saying, I also want to work on a scifi novel as something of a backup.

It will be interesting to see if I can pull off my vision for the main character of the first novel in this six-novel project. She is the heart and soul of the project, but her position in each of the novels is different. She is definitely at the center of the first three novels, but the last three she’s isn’t the protagonist anymore. But I hope I create an interesting enough character that people will be invested in her fate enough to want to read all six novels.

The heroine of the first three novels is a really cool. She’s been a lot of fun to develop and I think I’ve come up with a number of interesting quirks to her personality that will draw the audience in, want to spend some time with her. She kind of looks, in my mind’s eye, like a young Olivia Munn. But there are any number of women with a similar phenotype who could play her well.