Month: August 2020

The Cultural Heatsink That Is Taylor Swift’s Album ‘Cardigan’



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Where to begin on this one. Taylor Swift is an excellent lyricist and among the most influential performers of her generation. And, yet, her latest album seems to be fan service.

There was all this buzz among the faithful, but I haven’t seen any buzz about it beyond that. I had to go out of my way to listen to it on Spotify. What I’ve heard of it so far is pretty good. Nothing unexpected. Pretty much what you would expect from someone like Taylor Swift at this point in her career.

It makes you wonder what this means. It seems like the lack of buzz for the album says more about the modern state of pop culture than it does her. And, really, what I might be noticing is she didn’t drop a video for any of the songs. Typically, a video would get some press over and above what one might expect from the usual Taylor Swift places.

I have to note that Taylor Swift sent Cara Delevingne and Kaia Gerber a two person cardigan to wear in honor of the album’s release. What the what? It’s surreal that no one has pointed out the obvious implications of this. Sounds a lot like if there is a romantic relationship between Ms. Delevingne and Ms. Gerber it’s obviously well known enough that Swift sent the two women such a gift. And, again, maybe I’m drawing a conclusion that isn’t supported by the facts. I’m more than willing to admit that possibility. But, let’s be honest, folks. Is it really credible to believe that someone like Ms. Delevingne would shoot a platonic selfie with a catch like Ms. Gerber? REALLY? In a two person cardigan of all things? REALLY?

Anyway. No one listens to me and they probably shouldn’t.

Back to Swift. I still wish she would assemble a female super group and go straight rock with it. But apparently, rock is dead and gone, never to return. Lulz?

DPRK & The American Mad King (A Scenario)


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It’s demonstrable that the president of the United States is just barely hanging on to his sanity. Trump is very unstable and erratic, especially on Twitter which is apparently a direct link to his Id. But, to date, he’s managed to keep it together enough that nothing TOO dangerous has happened.

Now that we’re in August — which is a pretty shitty month for news — let’s think up a scenario whereby Trump’s craziness goes from malevolent uncle to destroyer of worlds.

There are many, many scenarios one can think up. But the one that is the easiest to plot out is something to do with North Korea. It’s generally believed that only a crazy person would poke that particular bear unless their was an absolute reason to do so.

To date, Trump’s bonkers behavior has gone the exact opposite direction — he’s be a real suck up to the worst tyrant on the planet. And, in a sense, that’s been for the best. At least we’re not worried about a limited nuclear exhange.

But, let do that now.

The thing about this scenario is it could happen at any point while Trump is president. It could happen today, it could happen two years into Trump’s stolen second term. It’s not like history gives a shit about anyone’s particular political agenda. There’s a reason why they say, “Death be not proud.”

Anyway, for the purposes of this scenario, this happens sooner rather than later. Like August 2020. What prompts Trump finally losing his mind is his absolute need to win re-election smashes into his realization that while he is obviously going to successfully steal the election, it’s going to involve a lot of work and he’s lazy.

So, let’s say he REALLY snaps and he turns his eyes to the DPRK.

The first thing that would happen is we wouldn’t know it had happened. Trump’s been so unstable for so long that the America media works pretty hard to hide it from the public. So, it’s likely if he really did snap and started to see war with the DPRK as an easy way to win re-election “fair and square” we would think he was “joking.”

If something happened and Trump felt offended by Little Rocket Man, he might start to rant about the need to whip the DPRK off the planet. Or he would pull out all American civilians associated with AFK, which would seriously spook the North Koreans.

Once he actually started to do something demonstrable like that, people would sit up and take notice. This wouldn’t be “joking,” this would be serious. The major miscalculation Trump would make — because he’s stupid — is he would see a bloody three month war with the DPRK as simply something he had to do to win re-election.

What he wouldn’t think about is the DPRK, if it felt it had an existential threat on its hands, would likely shoot off a few ICBMs with H-bombs on them our way. And I have no confidence in the DPRK’s guidance equipment. Just because it’s supposed to hit, say, DC, doesn’t mean it won’t veer off course and hit, say, gulp, Richmond.

Anyway, the point is, Trump screwing up a war with the DPRK and being blamed for it is pretty much the only way I can possibly see Trump ever leaving office for any reason.

Trump Is Playing With Fire With The Bogus Durham Investigation



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It wasn’t supposed to be this way. Trump was supposed to lose the popular vote and win the Electoral College just like in 2016. Just after his acquittal by callow Senate Republicans he was giving a very loud standing ovation by these same Republicans in a private meeting.

Trump knew all he had to do was absolutely placate the MAGA base and the rest would take care of itself.

Then COVID19 happened.

Now things are a bit more tricky. Trump’s natural inculcation is to use the bullshit Durham Investigation into the origins of the TrumpRussia investigation to indict Joe Biden and be done with it. He would kill two birds with one stone — he would “prove” that TrumpRussia was a “hoax” and he would knock out Biden so he easily wins re-election.

I am fully prepared to state that this may still work. In fact, it will work. If we’ve gotten this far down the road to tyranny, then something as simple as brazenly indicting Joe Biden for political gain is a lulz. All they have to do is indict Biden a just the right moment so there’s some confusion about it all as people go to the polls. By the time everything gets straightened out, Trump will be ranting about the need for a Constitutional Convention and MAGA will simply dismiss people people’s rage at what happened as the usual “Orange Man Bad” liberals being “triggered.”

As an aside, I think we might be willing to think outside the box a little bit — what if Durham waits until AFTER the election to indict Biden and the whole thing is used as a negotiating tactic to make sure TRUMP isn’t indicted after he leaves office? The only reason why I’m not prepared to accept this as a possibility is Trump is a fucking moron and his actual personal political skill is little more than a grunt.

Anyway, there is a least a tiny chance that while indicting Biden as the “October Surprise” gets the job done, it might also be something so outrageous and on the nose that even people who otherwise “don’t have time for politics” might, at last sit up and take notice. It’s not likely, but it’s possible — I mean, if you’re cool with “tender care facilities” what’s a little election theft between fascists?

But it is possible that some pretty unexpected things might happen if Trump gets too greedy and indicts Biden directly. If he was smart — which he is not — he would get really close to Biden, but not indict Biden himself. But MAGA people are so absolute in their bloodlust when it comes to the Durham Investigation that I could totally see them lulzing this and making a significant strategic error.

I’m not prepared to get my hopes up, though. More likely than not, the country is simply too divided. And, if anything, history books will count the indictment of Biden as the moment the United States, for intents and purposes, finally became a fascist state.

I keep trying to come up with solutions or what people can do on a practical level to combat this, but I guess I’m not smart enough. Everything I can think of involves getting at least 3.5% of the population to participate in mass protests and general strikes.

The United States simply has no political history of something so big — we’re not France, after all, so lulz.

America In Brown & Red



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I know way too many fucking fascists in real life. I, personally, have come to accept that not only has fascism taken over the country I love, but that Trump is going to brazenly steal the 2020 Election. What’s more, about 38% of the electorate is going to embrace this theft rather willingly.

There a number of significant macro trends that make all this possible and they all express themselves in the guise of one Donald John Trump. He’s an avatar for some pretty intractable problems in the United State’s body politic. What bothers me is a lot of Twitter liberals who should know better are deluding themselves about what’s going on.

These Twitter liberals are so busy scoring points on social media with memes they think will “destroy” House Trump, that they are totally oblivious to what’s going on in the real world. Many, many people are too busy raising their kids and paying their mortgage to “have time for politics” and, as such, they have only a vague awareness of what’s going on. All they know is, on an abstract level, Trump is protecting them from violent progressives (Communists) who want to “destroy the sanctity of marriage” and burn Federal court houses.

What’s more, their abstract fears about what these evil liberal progressives (Communists) MIGHT do are so all consuming that they honestly don’t care about the very real fascist things House Trump is actually doing right now. And so when House Trump inevitably indicts Joe Biden in late October as part of the bogus Durham Investigation, they’ll lulz it. And if they do ever get around to figuring out the whole thing was done to steal the election, it’ll be so long after the fact as to be politically pointless.

Then these very same people will simply shrug and tell people like me to “shut up if you know what’s good for you.” These Good Germans will get upset when people protest (if they do) when Trump steals the fall election in an extremely brazen fashion.

As I’ve mentioned before, what Trump wants to do is throw so much interference at the 2020 Election that we will struggle to pinpoint what, exactly what the thing that did it. That’s what he wants. He doesn’t want to do anything so absolutely brazen that American’s self-perception kicks in an people realize what he’s up to.

And, yet, with things like the Durham Investigation, he’s setting himself up to do just that. The whole thing is fucking bullshit and when Durham indicts (or whatever) Biden in late October the whole thing is going to be a little bit too on the nose for a lot of people. And, yet, there is such absolute bloodlust for just that on the part of the entire Republican Party that the whole thing may get out of control.

Not that indicting Biden isn’t going to work — it obviously will. And, generally, most people are just going to take the indictment at face value and Trump will cruise to victory. But there’s at least a greater than zero chance that people who otherwise might not care might sit up and take notice. It’s possible, not probable.

Remember those macro trends. The problems that caused Trump in the first place aren’t going anywhere. So, even if somehow we magically are able to frog walk Trump out of the White House at some point, he’s going to be seen as a political martyr by the Right. They are going to do everything in their power to bring down the Biden Administration as soon as possible.

There are no easy answers to this problem. The reason is — if Twitter liberals finally stopped trying to score points on Twitter and took the actions necessary in real fucking life to actually halt the ascent of fascism in the United States there will be blood, as they say.

Republicans have already crossed the Rubicon into fascism — they’re ready to make the jump from insane rhetoric on FOX News to murdering people in cold blood for political reasons. Should the center-Left get woke to this cold hard fact, well, I guess we’re going to have a civil war.

But I’m reluctant to say that.

The center-Left in the Untied States is so fucking weak that what’s more likely to happen is simply the bad guys will win and after the shock of Trump brazenly stealing the election wears off, we’re going to get used to people getting pushed out of windows.

That’s probably going to be the last stage in our transformation to a “managed democracy” like Russia in the sense that Trump will have to purge the media first to get away with it. Can’t very well make people mad by pushing people out windows if no body knows about it because OANN now owns CNN, now can you?

If Russia is any indication, what will happen is pop culture in the Unites States will decouple completely from politics. Only people like me will scream at the top of our lungs as to what’s going on (and get pushed out a window for doing it.) The average person might take note that suddenly CNN and FOX news are indistinguishable, but that’s about it.

Because of macro trends, this is the future of America. There might be the occasional hiccup because Trump is such a fucking incompetent, moronic self-own artist, but the general we have to wait until the Graying of America crosses the Browning of America before any of this changes. And, given that the entire point of MAGA is to STOP the Browning of America, lulz, maybe it will never happen.

I don’t have any answers as to how to prevent any of this. I would, however, suggest that we’re now in the part of America’s transition to a fascist state where you what you do in real life matters. Scoring points, or thinking up a powerful meme doesn’t mean shit when Little Green Men are snatching people off the street or, later, pushing people out windows.

I used to think Americans weren’t Russians and, by definition, would not allow a fascist, autocratic “managed democracy” to happen here. But I realize now I was being naive. It can –and will — happen here.

Phone Polling Adventures


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

As we lurch towards Trump finalizing his fascist consolidation of power in the United States, I find myself becoming a sucker for political phone polls. Something about this small — but important — aspect of recently bygone era when what the population of the country actually thought is appealing.

One thing I’ve noticed is most of the polls I’m getting are obviously from Republicans. All of the polls I’ve taken recently were pretty fucking warped. They don’t seem like polls at all, but rather being used as a focus group for Republican oppo research.

But none of it matters.

The Durham Investigation is going to indict Biden in late October. If that doesn’t work, the slowing of the mail will. And if THAT doesn’t work, the Russians will live up to their part of the bargain associated with Trump removing 1/3 of our troops from Germany and hack directly into our election systems.

As I keep saying, we really, really need to accept that the United States is now a fascist state. The whole snatching people off the street will soon enough be pushing people out of windows.

There is no hope.

Fascist America: Everyone Needs To Do A Gut Check



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

The fascists have won. I say that because Trump is assembling about a dozen different ways he’s going to steal the 2020 Election. If it’s not the Durham Investigation indicting Joe Biden the weekend before the election, it’ll be the post office essentially becoming an arm of the Trump Campaign. And those are just the most obvious ones. There will not be a free and fair election.

And, even if somehow Trump manages to self-own to such an extent that Biden actually does manage to be win the electoral vote, Trump is going to challenge the certification of the popular vote at ever stage. In the end, his criminality and his insanity will fuse and, well, lulz, he’s not going anywhere.

So, with that in mind, if you’re not MAGA, you need to do a gut check as to what you believe. It is very, very easy to write a witty tweet that goes viral. But it’s going to be a lot different when ICE starts snatching people off the street or pushing people out windows in the real world.

What do you believe on an existential level? Are you really willing to face indefinite incarceration in an ICE camp or the risk of simply being pushed out a window for your opposition to Trump’s fascist tyranny? Nearly everyone can talk a good talk on social media, but when you’re shoved into an unmarked van by a member of PACT or ICE, you might simply turn into a quivering mess.

There’s going to come a moment very, very soon — probably in 2021 — when we’re going to find out who is willing to pledge their “lives and scared honor” for the America that existed for about 240 years before Trump. While a few bonkers people like me, with nothing to lose, will take a stand and tell Trump’s goons to fuck off — and be murdered accordingly — most people are going to take the advice of MAGA people who will tell them, “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll shut up.”

I don’t have any easy answers for you. I can’t tell you in practical terms what to do or how to prevent the inevitable from happening. I hate violence and I hate guns. Usually, it takes a war of some sort to end a fascist regime. There’s no one to invade us. I mean, who’s going to do it? The EU?

All I can tell you is the final official transformation of the United States into a fascist state is going to happen in fits and starts and then EXTREMELY RAPIDLY. Get out of the country if you can. Start thinking about where you might hide.

But the issue is — ranting on social media about Trump simply isn’t going to cut it anymore. You’re going to have to think about your career, your life and your family in the real world. Fascism is the ultimate “cancel culture,” if you will.

Darkness has fallen. There’s no going back. If it’s not Trump who does it, it’ll be Mike Pomepo or Tom Cotton. The macro trends simply aren’t on our side. And while there may be rolling political violence this fall and winter, I just don’t see there being any type of organized civil war. Though, I would note the only way we’re ever, EVER getting rid of Trump is the country will have to be on the verge of a revolution. That’s the only way I can think of that the political fault lines might shift just long enough to physically frog walk Trump out of the Oval Office.

Even then, this would be only a brief reprieve. Trump would immediately become a political martyr in the eyes of MAGA and he’ll find some fascist ghost writer to write his own “Mien Kampf.”

We’ve reached the end of the United States as we’ve known it.

Countdown To American Fascism: ‘Vichy America’



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

When major macro historical events happen, it’s often very difficult for the people living through them to understand what’s going on. This is the case with what’s happening in the United States. Several existential macro trends are happening all at once in American society, such that what’s really happening is almost complete obscured to us on an everyday basis.

The only thing I can compare modern America to is Vichy France. The French leadership in 1940 decided they would rather be “brown than red” and simply gave up when confronted with defeat at the hands of the Nazis. It makes a lot of sense now, but at the time, I suspect a lot your average Frenchmen were astonished at what was going on around them.

The key to understanding these macro trends is Trump. He’s the Rosetta stone for the fall of the American Republic. That Trump continues to have a base of about 40% is all you need to know about the rise of American Fascism. Trump is America’s Putin to an eerie extent. Or, put another way, if he’s not America Putin, he’s the guy who broke the seal on tyranny and allowed that person to come to power.

Really, the only thing stopping Trump from attaining the level of power that Putin has in Russia is, well, Trump. Trump is such a incompetent moron that all he can do is destroy the norms necessary to get us to the point that Mike Pompeo or Tom Cotton turns us into a fascist authoritarian “managed democracy.” On a macro level this is an absolute. Our fate is sealed. There’s no turning back.

What this means is, the Republican Party no longer sees democracy as legitimate and while Democrats are thinking of killer memes that “destroy” Trump on Twitter, the Republicans are assembling all the real-world tools they need to destroy democracy for the next 30 to 40 years, if not forever. It’s possible that this is it — whatever democracy arises from the ashes of the United States won’t be called the United States.

And, really, there’s very little we can do at this point. It’s all over but the shouting, as they say. Trump is going to brazenly steal the 2020 Election, call for a Constitutional Convention and then start pushing people out of windows in quick succession.

Something about Obama’s second term turned the Republican Party into rabid fascists. All you have to do is turn on Fox News any night and the level vitriol directed against anyone who stands in the way of The Dear Leader is pretty astonishing. Twitter liberals too often clutch their pearls and say, “Oh, that would never happen” because they have deluded themselves into thinking Republicans give a shit about anything but power and greed.

As I keep saying, we have to wait until the demographic trends of the Graying of American crosses the Browning of America at some point in the next 20 to 40 years before we have a chance to do anything about American Fascism. Fascism is here in America now. We’re a fascist state for no other reason than one of the two major political parties IS FASCIST.

I wish Republicans would embrace their status as fascists. Such unexpected honesty would make life easier for everyone involved. Then we wouldn’t have to quibble about what they really mean when they say the United States is a “Constitutional Republic.”

On a practical level, because of the Overton Window, what’s probably going to happen is Trump’s brazen theft of the 2020 Election will be seen as the final dead knell of the United States, even though the American textbooks of the future will likely say this happened when Trump was acquitted by the Senate. Once Trump realized he could get away with anything, the rest took care of itself.

Darkness has fallen. Really, at this point it’s just an issue of how long it takes before ICE begins pushing people out of windows like the Russians do. I predict that will begin to happen no later than 2023 if Trump doesn’t finally lose his shit. And maybe about 2025 if we have to wait until Mike Pompeo or Tom Cotton finishes the job Trump started.

I can’t predict the future, but the macro trends in the United States say this is absolutely going to happen. It’s cold hard fact of life. There’s no going back now.

Of The Coming Constitutional Convention



by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Again, form follows function. Trump calls his good buddy Putin about once every two weeks these days, so it’s safe to say that if the bullshit Durham Investigation doesn’t help Trump steal the 2020 Election, the Russians will.

We therefore have to accept that it’s an absolute fact of life that Trump is going to “win” re-election by stealing it in a rather dramatic fashion. There will be a lot of angry tweets by the so-called “Resistance” but not a lot is going to happen where it actually matters — real life.

For months, twitter “thought leaders” will fight over what, exactly, allowed Trump to win. While all that’s happening, of course, Trump is going to start ranting about how big the budget deficit is and how we ABSOLUTELY have to call a Constitutional Convention to solve that problem.

We will then go through what is now the routine. At first, Trump will tweet about it and everyone will be shocked. Republicans will universally say Trump’s just joking and we’ve all fallen for his “master troll.” There will be a lot of talk about how people like me are being hysterical, as usual and that “Orange Man Bad” is all I have to contribute to the conversation. Then, of course, Trump will make it absolutely clear that he’s very, very serious about this proposal.

This will lead to a lot of ever-so-serious discussion about the need to balance the budget and how the only way to enact this long-needed addition to the Constitution is via a Constitutional Convention. The Fox News propaganda machine will be all in. While Twitter Liberals gnash their teeth about what a bad idea a Constitutional Convention would be, Fox New’s will articulate a very simple case for why it’s needed.

The momentum will begin to build in the mainstream press. Soon, there will be talk of the possible liberal benefits of such a Convention. Who knows, maybe the ERA will be passed! There will be a pitched battle for much of 2021 as to if this is a good idea or not. Maggie Haberman will coo about what a brilliant political mind Trump is.

Ultimately, of course, we’ll get the 5(?) state legislatures we need to have it called up. As I understand it, precedent would suggest that delegates to this Convention will be surprise! picked by state legislatures which are overwhelmingly MAGA Republicans.

The moment the convention assembles, it goes rouge. Some of that might be from Trump ranting at it everyday on Twitter and some of it may be just Republicans, by definition, hate liberal democracy. When the process is completed a slew of American Enabling Acts are drawn up. Birthright citizenship will be eliminated. Trump will be able to run for as many terms as he likes. Hell, maybe they’ll figure out a way that Trump can simply rule by decree because, lulz, nothing matters.

After a lot of debate, 3/4’s of the State legislatures pass these American Enabling Acts and House Trump’s power is codified into law.

That’s it. That’s our future.

Trump’s Coming Second Term Purge of Late Night Hosts


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Form follows function, so it would make a lot of sense that once Trump brazenly steals a second term that one of the first things he’s going to do is purge late night of all the hosts he doesn’t like.

Remember, by this point, Trump will have crossed a number of Rubicons in his successful efforts to steal the 2020 election, so he’s going to do some pretty jawdropping things that even he might not have thought about doing before. There are two ways I could see him getting rid of late show hosts he didn’t like.

One would be direct — he tells the heads of the majors media companies to do it or else. He’ll take their broadcasting license or whatever. This probably will happen behind the scenes, but when the boom is dropped it will happen very rapidly. We’ll all find out what he did, but lulz, nothing matters.

There’s another way he might do it — he might convince “German Industrialists” to buy up stock in various media companies and get them to pressure media execs to get rid of the hosts that way.

Whenever this happens — and it WILL happen — there will be a lot of gnashing of teeth by media types. We’ll learn all about the Smothers Brothers and LBJ. There might be some isolated protests. Many a “successful” meme will be launched on social media that “destroys” Trump. (Ugh.) But, in the end, nothing will happen. Absolutely nothing. Trump will win and there will be a new crop of late night hosts. It could be a number of these new hosts will be women or minorities in a sop liberals. But, oddly, none of these new hosts will talk about politics at all.

Meanwhile, the purged late night hosts will get new deals on Netflix or Disney+. They will all start a number of successful podcasts.

But an era will be over.

Soon enough, a similar purge will take place in TV newsrooms across the country. It’s even possible that Rupert Murdoch will be encouraged to buy The New York Times and or CNN. By the time Trump ramps up his efforts to get a Constitutional Convention called up to “pass a balanced budget amendment” the media in the United States will be nothing more than a lap dog to House Trump.

I believe barring a pretty enormous self-own on the part of Trump himself (which is obviously always possible) this is our future. It’s an absolute law of nature at this point.

Dear Seth Rogen: Here’s The Plot of Your ‘Alien Test’ Movie


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Working Title “Radar Love”
The first thing we see before the opening credits is a microscopic spaceship slowing down as it enters our solar system. It lands on the moon. Soon a bigger — but still small — spaceship shoots out of the lunar surfance, heading towards earth. This small ship finally enters the earth’s atmosphere and lands somewhere rather non-descriptive in either LA or NYC. After a few moments, the spot where the little ship landed begins to shift and bubble.

Opening Credits

Act I
We open with our Hero walking into work at his 80s radioshow in LA (or NYC). We’re introduced to the zany characters of his show. We learn a little backstory. He’s recently broken up with his long-term girlfriend and he’s feeling a little sorry for himself.

But once he’s on air, he switches gears and is very much a Robin Williams in “Good Morning, Vietnam.”

Inciting Incident: Our Hero wraps up the broadcast for the day and is told by his secretary that there’s someone to see him. He notices a well dress ethnically ambiguous woman standing in the foyer waiting for him. He’s taken aback that someone so hot would want to talk to him. After some pleasantries we cut to the two having coffee.

The woman acts as if she’s been listening to his 80s rock show avidly and yet there’s something a little off about her. She finally looks at him and says there’s something she has to tell him. She places her hand on his and there’s a 2001’s star gate sequence that we see happening in his mind.

He wakes up on a cot in a strange windowless room. He searches his mind for what happened and is boggled by the amount of information he now knows. The woman he met for coffee appears again and asks him if he’s ready? Ready for what, he asks. Our meeting, she says.

Act 1 ends with our Hero realizing he’s in a huge spaceship floating over Washington DC. He and the woman go down the steps of the ship and ultimately meet POTUS.

Act 2

This portion of the plot involves our hero coming involved in a huge planet-wide struggle. Everyone is upset that some nobody has been chosen by aliens to take a huge test that will determine humanity’s fate. There’s lots of efforts to discredit him. The aliens are absolutely clear — they love the music he plays and he’s their guy.

Midpoint: Because no one believes the aliens when they say they can move several hundred million humans to a new solar system, our Hero has to test out the technology. He takes a pill and wakes up in a pod on the other side of the planet.

The rest of this act involves the bad guys trying to screw up our hero’s attempts to take the test in question. He ultimately takes the test — it’s simply a test of his musical knowledge — and he passes with flying colors.

The “all is lost” moment of the second act is when it seems clear that humanity is too divided to take advantage of this amazing offer. The aliens get fed up and leave earth. In desperation, our Hero plays rock music at his radio station in a desperate hope to convince them to come back. (He talks to them via the titles of rock songs.)

At the very end of the act, it seems All Is Lost.

Act 3
Surprise! The aliens come back. Act three involves the process of moving people off the planet. The last scene is our Hero waking up on the new planet and realizing humanity has a second chance to get things right.

Of course, you need to throw in some romance somewhere along the way…maybe with the alien girl who is some sort of synthetic human?