That Silicon Valley Is Buzzing About Clubhouse Is Comical


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I have a sense of why Clubhouse is popular — you participate in a Zoom-like meeting while taking a dump. Or nude. Or whatever. So, that causes a lot of powerful people to want to participate. Throw in artificial scarcity and you have the makings of a very popular site.

But, bruh, where is my Mindcap?

If Big Tech would just admit that they can read our minds, then after everyone stopped being shocked, Big Tech could say, “Within 18 months we’ll be selling you Mindcaps for $1,200.”

And, yet, what’s got the attention of Silicon Valley? A digital version of a rural party line. COME ON. It’s all very strange. It’s strange that Silicon Valley is so disconnected from the Steve Jobs ethos of putting a “dent in the universe” that they’re screwing around with something as inward looking as Clubhouse.

Whatever. I have a novel to work on.

The Third Great Cataclysm


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner


It’s at least possible when the United States finally buckles, it will be up there will the fall of the two Romes in its significance. The reason is — the United States holds the entire world together.

If we’re too busy killing each other — or we just pull a Dr. Manhattan on world affairs — everything is going to go tits up pretty quick. The number of dead could get up into the 100s millions.

I just don’t think the average person realizes how rotten the American political system is. When America at last buckles, it will happen so quickly that we won’t be able to process it.

The core issue is — is the United States going to have a civil war or become an entirely inward looking autocracy? As of right now, I honestly have no clue which of these two possibilities will come true — but I do know it will be one of them.

A lot depends on if House Trump bungles the transition to Truamplandia or not in the 2024-2025 period. If there’s a smooth transition to the “Velvet Fist” of, say, Ivanka Trump / Tom Cotton or Lara Trump / Josh Hawley, then, well, we’ll be an autocracy. But if they fuck things up like they always do, then we’ll have a civil war.

As I say, get out the country if you can.

Think Bigger, Silicon Valley


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner


I only talk about this again because I can not believe that of all the things generating buzz right now fucking a digital version of the old rural party line — Clubhouse — is huge. What. The. Actual. Fuck.

Where’s all the talk of “disrupting” the way we live in fundimental ways? Meh. Give me a Mindcap like in Arthur C. Clarke’s 3001: The Final Odyssey instead of a tech weenie circle jerk.

But, I don’t see my vision happening. Even if Big Tech can read my mind as I suspect, no one cares,. I’m just a rando writing a novel. Though, to be fair to myself, I am using some of my allotted words to give people my personal vision of how some of the technology I believe SHOULD exist would be used in a practical fashion.

That’s one of the unexpected aspects of this novel — how much it’s veered off into practical scifi in ways I didn’t really expect. But I really need to just throw myself back into this novel again.

This weekend I kind of relaxed. Now it’s time write write write. Maybe I’ll inspire so nerd to change our lives again en mass.

The Post Rona World Is Upon Us: Summer Is Looking Good


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I’m calling it — it’s going to be a party in the USA on July 4th. That’s when I think Rona will finally be behind us and things will get back to “normal.” Everyone who wants a “jab” as the British would say will get one. Travel will get back to normal. Wealthy people will go back to making poor people like me “curse the bread” and doing secret back channels in the Seychelles.

It’s very possible that the 18 months of Rona will be completely value free. The only thing to come from it all will be a defeat of Donald Fucking Trump at the polls. Otherwise, it will go down the memory hole and we get to enjoy our Weimar America leading up to the final strangling of our democracy by the Nazi Republicans in 2024.

At least, that’s what it seems like.

Really, the only thing I’m nervous about is the age of some of the people in power right now. Prince Phillip is old as fuck. The Queen is no spring chicken. And Joe Biden is almost 80. I hope all of them live for many more years, but we have to be honest with ourselves at some point.

But anyway, the point is, by this fall, it’s very likely it will be like Rona never happened. Republicans, of course, will still be screaming about “cancel culture” and having absolutely no policies other than “fuck your feelings but my feelings are sacred.”

Our Zombie Republic: A Review of Ezra Klein’s ‘Why We’re Polarized’


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

It’s comical — in a tragic, macro kind of way. The United States is one presidential election away from tyranny and we’re all supposed to just sleep until it happens.

Remember, the issue is, the Republican Party no longer believes in politics as we conceive of it in a liberal democracy and see democracy as a means to either obtain or maintain power. That’s it. They have no policies other than screaming about “cancel culture” while they wait to take power again (then never let it go.)

Reading Ezra Klein’s “Why We’re Polarized” changed my (political) life for how it opened my eyes as to the crux of problems before us. It all boils down to white people are nervous about losing the majority and, as such, some basic concepts about the American experience that I assumed were just, well, the American way are actually all lie. (In a sense.)

The lie is — America is an idea and a melting pot so we race, while our original sin, is something we’ve gotten past on an institutional level. Psyche! Turns out the idea of “America is an idea” is, actually a phantasm. America is only an idea when white people feel comfortable with their place on top. Now that that’s changed, well, we have (waves hand) all this. It’s an idea when white people allow it to be an idea. Otherwise, fuck you, it’s blood and soil. Remember, in the 1850s, it was Germans that everyone was worried about! But, as I’ve written before — it’s also white blue collar men who now can’t get laid that are a problem in our politics.

Anyway, I loved Klein’s book but for one thing — the ending. The ending s u c k e d. The reason — all the solutions he proposed at the end of the book were useless. Me, a deranged anonymous crank on the Internet, have been able to come up with at least one solution better than all his pie-in-the-sky “solutions.” I propose that we institute National Service over the next four years if we want to save our Republic.

In fact, National Service is the ONLY way to solve our current long-term macro problems. If every 18 year old was absolutely fucking forced to live with someone from outside their state regardless of their education or life goals then our common sense of what it means to be “American” would be significantly re-inforced.

Klein’s solutions were the political equivalent of hoping Jesus Christ comes back.

So, if you can simply stop reading when you get the last chapter, I think you’ll really enjoy Klein’s book. It really, really helped me understand why were so totally, completely fucked.

The End Of Politics & The Looming Second American Civil War


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

Most of the traffic this site gets now is from people nervous about the possibility of a Second American Civil War. They have every right to be. American politics isn’t functioning anymore and either, in the end, the United States becomes an autocracy or we implode into civil war / revolution. At least, that’s the macro trend as of March, 2021.

I’ve been reading as much as I can about the rise of Hitler and, in general, tyranny. It definitely seems as though the recent Capitol Insurrection is just a sign of things to come. Only because Trump is a fucking lazy idiot are we not, right now, either in a civil war or in the final stages of some sort of autocratic consolidation of power.

But, here we are.

We’ve punted the existential threat the GQP don’t the road maybe four years. All the conditions are there for the GQP to, at last, strangle American liberal democracy in 2024. Republicans will control Congress in 2024 and since they hate democracy as much as they hate brown people and women with sexual agency, when the exact same thing that happened in 2020 happens AGAIN, well, we’re just fucked.

We either have a civil war or we turn into a MAGA-Qanon themed autocracy. As I keep saying, get out while you still can. If there is a Second Civil War, you would be a fool to think WMD won’t be stolen at some point and used. We’re going to nuke ourselves out of existence. That’s how civil wars are — they’re nasty and sometimes go in directions you can’t expect.

So, for the time being, we’ve punted the specific crisis of a civil war down the road. But when the time comes — around 2024 – 2025 — we’re going to be faced with the same choice we were faced with in 2020: autocracy or civil war?

WW2 Saeculum: Our American Zombie Republic


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

When I’m not writing an allegorical thriller about the Trump Era, I’m reading. A lot of that reading has to do with the novel. But some of that reading is about something I’m very nervous about — how the United States is careening towards a second civil war.

Remember, that second civil war would have already happened but for one thing, or person: Donald Trump. All the conditions were there in 2020 and by only one metric did we not either slip into autocracy or have some sort of civil war — Donald fucking Trump is a fucking idiot.

He was so fucking lazy that the fate of the United States, in a sense, turned on a dime. We faced the precipice and, in an almost cartoonish fashion, we turned around and walked back into an era of democratic norms.

So, in a sense, all my hysterical ranting about Trump was right but for one thing — when push came to shove, Trump was such a lazy fucking moron he simply was not able to do what 99% of the people in the world would do in his position — knock some heads to stay in power.

As such, here we are: we’re a zombie repubic.

We’ve punted the question of “autocracy or civil war” down the road four years. The United States is, on a macro level, extremely unstable right now. There are two historical analogies I could point to. One is 1860.

Imagine if some of the last ditch efforts to stop the civil war worked and they simply punted the crisis down the road four years. That’s what’s going on now.

The other is 1933.

We’re kind of if Hitler lost the election in 1933, but vowed to try again and just kind of lurked around waiting for his opportunity .

But the key thing you have to remember is — there is no narrative to history as its happening. It’s very, very possible that the Bad Guys will win and a lot of people — like me! — will die because we won’t shut up about the tyranny of MAGA. We won’t be around to see the downfall of the GQP because of their excesses.

There is a broader macro geopolitical issue to worry about — a stable United States is the lynchpin of the post-World War 2 Pax America we’ve all come to enjoy for the last 70 years or so.

Should the US implode into civil war or simply become an inward looking MAGA autocracy, well, it won’t be just the United States that’s fucked. And, surreally enough, such a massive clusterfuck might happen just about 100 years from the end of WW2. (And, remember there were about 100 years from the Congress of Vienna to the outbreak of World 1.)

So, I’m thinking maybe no later than the 2036-37 timeframe. (That would be 100 years from when Japan invaded Manchuria.)

Or, put another way — we’re just one election of a Trump-like autocrat away from the end of the post-WW2 era. World War 3 could very well happen and everything will be re-arranged in a rather blood and dramatic fashion.

Good luck.

‘Overtime’ — #Lyrics To An Adult Contemporary Song


I have no idea what I’m doing. But I stumbled across the Ariana Grande song “Motive” and for an adult contemporary song it’s damn good. But anyway, this song is meant to be about how “best things in life are free.”

Overtime
lyrics by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner
please give credit if you produce or perform

we ain’t go no money
baby we both know it’s true
but you’re rich in ways
that make the girls blush
so when you make it rain
in the bushes we take it slow
stroke, stroke, stroke

(chorus)
the jewlery may be fake
but the passion will be real
we’re working overtime, overtime, overtime
to heal the pain of keeping it real

I’m not prepared to be scared
we’re both broke it’s true
so our fun has to be free
you’re as strong as they come
which is what I do like clock work
one by one

when the dawn breaks
I’m all you can take
if I work back much more
you might break

(chorus)
the jewlery may be fake
but the passion will be real
we’re working overtime, overtime, overtime
to heal the pain of keeping it real

(bridge)
I ask you
when we win the lottery
will we still be in love
or will you leave me for a side chick
you just laugh and rub my head
tell me roll for another round

(chorus)
the jewlery may be fake
but the passion will be real
we’re working overtime, overtime, overtime
to heal the pain of keeping it real

(chorus)
the jewlery may be fake
but the passion will be real
we’re working overtime, overtime, overtime
to heal the pain of keeping it real

Lyric Writing Musings


by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner

I find myself feeling pretty good about the novel I’m working on. It’s not perfect and I’m just (again) at just about the end of the first act, but things are stable enough with it that I’m allowing myself to blow off some steam by writing song lyrics that will never, ever be performed.

But I think what’s going on is I like the challenges associated with at least TRYING to sell a pop song. I’m going to have to learn guitar, maybe buy some mixing equipment. And I’m going to have to study what makes a great pop song.

So, I find myself listening to the likes of Ariana Grande and….oh boy.

She can’t possibly be the horney little minx she tries to come off as. I guess the only reason why that is even an issue is her image is of a pre-teen. For her to be so raunchy in her songs…I mean…come the fuck on.

Anyway, one thing is clear about pop songs is they have to be open enough to interpretation that people can imbue the lyrics with their own, personal meanings. That’s what makes writing a pop song that isn’t 70s KISS song so difficult.

You have to both convey a lot of information but also the information is so vague in real terms that no one really knows what you’re talking about. But I think as a little bit of a treat to myself I may write a few song lyrics tonight just to stimulate that part of my mind after a long time of not doing so.

I’m well aware the whole thing is stupid since, like, what’s the point? But it is enjoyable in its own way to attempt to sort of write proto song lyrics that I might one day use as the basis for REAL song lyrics.

‘This City Doesn’t Deserve Me’ — #Lyrics To A Pop-Rock Song

The title of this song comes from something Tina Fey recounted one of her daughters saying: “this city doesn’t deserve me.” I know nothing about music, but I do enjoy telling stories using the economy of verse. And, honestly, once I finish the novel I’m working on, I may very well buy a guitar and see if I can sell one pop song before I croak.

I see this song as have a tune similar to this song:

This City Doesn’t Deserve Me
lyrics by Shelt Garner
@sheltgarner
Please credit if you produce or perform

skyscrapers surround me
keep me teathered
bound me
as I walk around Chinatown
not my fate to know yours
but I’m ready, ready
to test the ground
to become outward bound

(chorus)
this city doesn’t deserve me
I state as I flee the hate
this city doesn’t deserve me
I state as I flee the hate
why does it have to be this way
at this late date

(bridge)
love the energy of this ground
but it’s tough to get around
when it doubt run for the hills
maybe find some thrills

(chorus)
this city doesn’t deserve me
I state as I flee the hate
this city doesn’t deserve me
I state as I flee the hate
why does it have to be this way
at this late date